Why does your W's behavior make sense to me? Because it is so similar to how my W is. I don't believe she would keep me on the accounts after the divorce though. Money and control are too important in her family. But the behavior is so similar.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Men going through MLC are a totally different animal to women going through a MLC. I'd take on a Man's anyday over a Woman's. That would be scary. I'm female, I understand their motivations and maneuvers.
X and I had a blowup yesterday. Haven't had one since June (about two months). This was a pretty good one. Went from 0 to 120 in about 30 seconds. That fact causes me to think there were other factors involved: OMH was out of town as he often is and I think this is wearing on X. Poor thing.
X wants to switch the weekends we have the kids and I said no. She immediate blew up and went into a tirade about issues from the marriage and separation she blames upon me. She finally said she was calling her lawyer and would let him deal with this since I was being so "controlling". I replied, "Well you have fun" and hung up.
There really was no reason for her to become so angry so quickly.
Oh well, I'm tempted to go put HER lawyer (or another in his office) on retainer so she can't use him again.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
I think you're right, it sounds like XW is not very happy with the new life that she chose. Oh well, sometimes there are consequences for your actions.
Do you really think she'd call a lawyer because she had a tantrum over you not switching weekends with her? I would think a lawyer would set her straight...
I'm pretty sure when she calms down, she'll realize by the time a lawyer could do anything, IF he'd do anything, the weekend in question would be over. And yes, it sounds as if her new life hasn't made her very happy.
My H's ex was always pulling that "I'll call my lawyer" crap. Never happened.
Her new life is not as perfect as she envisioned it would be.
OMH's work schedule has changed and he is out of town MUCH more than before they were married. The kids mentioned them fighting over this when it began a year ago. There is a seasonal aspect to OMH's work and X mentioned to me last night that one season just completed and another season was about to begin. This comment was in context of her requesting again that we switch weekends. When OMH is out of town he cannot help her with the kids (or anything) and she is totally on her own.
Would she call a lawyer? I dunno. Surely she realizes she has no grounds for such a frivilous (as the court would see it) change. On the other hand there was a time when I didn't think she would call a lawyer and go through with a divorce. Boy, was I wrong about that one.
The frustrating part is I will be the one to catch h#ll regardless of what she does. In her mind any difficulty due to the D is my fault because its my fault we're divorced. The legal costs are all my fault because the D is my fault. It's my fault if she has to hire a lawyer because if I would just give her what she wants instead of being "controlling" she wouldn't have to go to a lawyer and spend the money. ANY "negative consequences" for any action she has taken is ultimately MY FAULT.
I just hope OMH catches a little of this angst from time to time.
Last edited by sleeper; 08/17/1011:52 AM.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
My guess would be that OM/H catches a LOT of her angst. And that's not good when he's only there every other weekend. From a personal standpoint, if that was the case is my situation, I would be grateful to have the time alone with my spouse, not worrying if he's there to 'help with the kids'. Seems kind of backwards to me.
I'm female, I understand their motivations and maneuvers.
OK, so what does this mean in femalemotineuver?
A couple of days after I asked X if I was still on the personal and business accounts, she writes me a check from the business from a new account at a different bank with her AND OMH's name on it. Her's was in large print with his in smaller beneath it, LOL.
Was that a coincidence?
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
Methinks something smells in paradise. Unless she's starting her own business, I can't imagine why she would have her checks that way, unless it was a way to pacify him but open a seperate account.
