Call bull$hit on that one. Cause that is EXACTLY what it is: I (WA) want out and you (LBS) won't beg me to stay. You won't allow me to manipulate you anymore, therefore, you must be cold. Don't fall for it.
Agreed. It's a double standard, the very things you wan to do, beg, plead, change overnight, are the very things a WAS NEEDS to self justify and break the gravity from the LBS. When that is cut off from them, things change, they are not in control of the situation as they thought they'd be. Thus, you are doing the right thing.
Me 35/XW 33 S13 & S12 M: 10/17/98 OM & S: 07/08 D final 06/09/09 12/03/09 - 06/13/10 "Piercing" 06/13/10: Engaged to Re-marry 10/17/10 06/25/10: Expecting baby #3 2/14/11
That's always been my biggest concern with the LRT strategy in terms of spouses who have felt neglected. I know that often when I pull away, my W has felt like I'm cold and withdrawn.
Hang in there dSH. It's not over til the fat lady sings.
Call bull$hit on that one. Cause that is EXACTLY what it is: I (WA) want out and you (LBS) won't beg me to stay. You won't allow me to manipulate you anymore, therefore, you must be cold. Don't fall for it.
Oh I recognize it now. But before I became a Jedi, I fell for it everytime.
She has no clue how bad this could really become. Our credit has been shot due to my business with my partners and the fact I have not received a steady paycheck in months. We have no equity in the home we are in, thanks to the market, and she put in the papers she wants to stay in the house with the kids, but she cant afford it. I have enough money set aside to go rent a new place tomorrow. I am going to go get the kids and hit the gym, she had the nerve to ask me to stop by her work so she can give the kids a treat, UMMM I just got served papers, is it normal for her to be on her high horse right now seeing me in shock? it is not even phasing her one bit?
You should have 30 days to file an appearance (or your attorney that is). Then, as noted above, a good attorney can slow this down or speed it up as you wish.
Be careful about moving out of the house. In some states it is viewed as abandonment.
Re the LRT - all I can say is it is working for me. My H hadn't actually filed, but he gave an attorney a retainer and I received a letter stating that was what was going to happen.
He: WAH Me: LBW Precious: DD
~ I'm grateful for every day I have to improve the way I relate.
This is happening really fast, 1 month ago she was sending me pics of her and the kids, saying "we love you" now papers? I am going nutz need to go throw weights around, and I need a kick in the @ss from Robx????
Go read Divorce Remedy. Go right to the LRT section. You have at least a month before you have to file anything (it should say that in the papers) and also find out if your state requires mediation. States often do when children are involved. That's usually a great delay tactic.
He: WAH Me: LBW Precious: DD
~ I'm grateful for every day I have to improve the way I relate.
I guess my first reaction was F her, if this is what she wants she can have it. Emotions, emotions I believe she did this off of emotions, and not really thinking it through. The last few days I have been distant and chipper, which I am sure pissed her off, thinking he doesnt give a sh!t so I will show him?? Like PMA said, its a pissing contest. I have told her its not what I want, and when she gets home I wont bring it up. I will wait a few days and see if she brings it up?
