ok I bite, how do you know that she contacted him????
Don't want to question your behaviour / attitude because you have every right to be carefull.....but I understand why he wants to "protect" Maria. Pardon me for making this comparison....if i get heat everytime I go golfing from my wife, why should I tell her if I sneek away? It is only going to result in an argument and I went during my workday so why should it matter to her???? You see what I am saying....he is protecting you, himself and the relationship. Sorry that is how we men think...
Great that he's trying to be reassuring. So good that he acknowledged that he read your e-mail and heard you even if he hasn't figured out how to take action yet.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Why can you not believe that "a R ends, a R so strong and passionate like theirs, just like "that". " ???
Thats EXACTLY how R's like that end !!! Its a 'false' love, so it often ends just like that and is done.
- Remember Gra and Cher? Wow, he was like obsessed with her for 2 years..he has now ended it and they both told us, they literally never want contact ever again with one another.
- My OM.. passion? We felt like we wanted to climb inside each others skin!...he stopped contact dead with me. I never heard from him again and I can only assume he is very relieved about that.
- My ex who I thought I loved..once it was done, I felt if I never saw him again, it would be too soon. He once turned up at my house 2am banging the doors.. I called the Police and left via the back door.
- I had to drop H at Helen's office this morning (euggh!) I asked him if he was nervous of seeing her, he said, do you know what? No, not at all, I couldnt care less anymore.
You drive yourself mad making things up in your mind. Maybe just learn to 'blow off' these negative thoughts, or look at the facts. HE ended it. That was a long time ago. He's told you he's done and that he loves you. What happened about the voice recorder?
As for the part-time relationship you are in with him, I totally agree, you cant go on like that. I really feel for you every time you post about it. My LL is quality time, I literally couldnt bare to not see H Sun-Thu, I would find that incredibly depressing and hurtful over a period of a few weeks, neverlone if that were a permanent arrangement. It must be awful for you, so yes, stick to your guns.. I hope he takes you seriously this time sweets. You cant go on like that, its no way to live huh... xxx
Sorry, I meant to add, if this is how you feel its how you feel, of course. But is it really doing you any good to keep focusing on it? Whether she contacts him or not (she may) its done, I dont see that as the issue anymore, or threat to your R. The threat seems to be from lack of QT together, the fact that makes it harder to really trust him (?) and his inability to take you seriously when you tell him that you cant go on like this and he has to change something. Perhaps he feels so secure with you and how you have stuck by him this past 13/14 years that he thinks no matter what he does, you will always be there.... xxx
Hey Ali, I think you hit the nail on the head. Let's face it, after having been discovered and let back in, I am sure there is a feeling of security on his part. Not outwardly or cocky but it has to be in his subconscious somewhere. There is also another "danger" that I sense; the boy who cried wolf syndrome. How many times can you tell someone that the status quo as it pertains to quality time is not working before he simply brushes it off as background noise. I know I am not offering solutions here. Just trying to put myself in his shoes .... As far as Maria's concern about ending what she describes as a passionate relationship cold turkey, I tend to agree with her. In my opinion something as passionate if not more has to replace it.....only K knows if he is living that with her. From what is described here, it is not the case. I have a hunch however that K puts a negative spin on things regarding hubby here (and in her real life) for self preservation purposes and honestly who could blame her.
I can understand being cautious but not being negative. You get back what you put out there. Ever notice how bad things seem to happen to the negative guy/gal over and over again? Somehow when you have a more positive way of looking at things, the bad things just don't seem so bad. Stuff happens, roll with it, fix it and get back to thinking good stuff.
Got a case of the sun in Leo!! lol
hugs, kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Well, the sun here didnt help much today. I am done with accepting the way he wants us to handle it: forget it. I told him so, he asked if I am OK. I may be bipolar who the f@ck knows?
I am mad at him for all the things he did. I am mad because he isnt taking care of me, he tries to avoid trouble. I am mad becasue I see nothing of all the things he gave to her happening to me/us. I am mad I am supposed to be a better person, take the high road etc etc. I want to be a bitch, I want to scream and shout, hit and kick him, I want to pour ALL this pain out of my chest and unload it on him, make him see it, force him to face it. I cant find love in my heart. I wish..., I wish I was nemo's friend with no memory.
I am mad all the things he does do, cant stop my heart from bleeding. I keep expecting to feel relief and I dont no matter what he does. I think this is a lost battle.
I am PMSing K
He answered questions. He got her pregnant by just...risking it because of the passion. WHAT IS HAPENNING TO THEIR BRAINS???????????????????????????????????
Oh and his best friend, our best man, the guys I've spent years with on vacation, etc etc knew this even before he had moved out. JERK!!
