Most R/o are good at 300 feet and i would put your kids and wife on that one i had to fight a false one that the judge threw out and told the ex he didnt want to see her again.
Me 37 Waw 32 son2 bomb 8/11/09 O/M 12/25/09 Divorce filed 8/25/09 divorce finale 6/16/10 Divorce putt on hold 6/16/10 Divorce postponed STBXW idea 8/8/10
Don't blame, don't be snarky, just go on a fact-finding mission and ask questions, like a reporter.
She may say vague things like, "I feel trapped" or "I hate all the obligations," etc. Ask her HOW she feels trapped and WHAT obligations. Dig deeper. You're trying to get inside her head.
Again, don't judge, don't condemn. She's acting this way for a reason, and you're trying to get to the root of the problem. She may not be able to articulate what the problem IS, may not have the right words for it, but this exercise might give you some insight.
How do you win someone to YOUR way of thinking? By seeing things THEIR way first (Dale Carnegie, "How to Win Friends and Influence People").
Don't blame, don't be snarky, just go on a fact-finding mission and ask questions, like a reporter.
She may say vague things like, "I feel trapped" or "I hate all the obligations," etc. Ask her HOW she feels trapped and WHAT obligations. Dig deeper. You're trying to get inside her head.
Again, don't judge, don't condemn. She's acting this way for a reason, and you're trying to get to the root of the problem. She may not be able to articulate what the problem IS, may not have the right words for it, but this exercise might give you some insight.
How do you win someone to YOUR way of thinking? By seeing things THEIR way first (Dale Carnegie, "How to Win Friends and Influence People").
NOT WITH AN ADDICT, who is still "using."
Ordinarily, I'd agree, Red, and that book is probably THE most influential book (other than the Bible) I've ever read (first read it when I was 17). But you can't reason with an addict when they're still in contact with the source of their addiction. Ken's wife feels "trapped" and "hates marriage" because she's having an affair, her brain is awash wit PEAs, and she sees her husband as THE main obstacle to getting her fix, unencumbered.
In light of what Pup and Allen are saying, I'll hold off on the pursuit for now. Pardon my ignorance, but what book are we talking about?
I got Father's day gifts from the kids this morning and W is planning to go visit her sister (who incidentally is going through a divorce) in Puerto Rico for a week leaving the kids here. And that's fine with me. I really see a problem with it.
My wife is asking for a divorce and I don't completely understand why.
"How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. It was written in the 1930's.
Originally Posted By: ken5140
W is planning to go visit her sister (who incidentally is going through a divorce) in Puerto Rico for a week leaving the kids here. And that's fine with me. I really see a problem with it.
Originally Posted By: Allen A
Unless OM is on a plane there as you type this it should be fine ya...
That was my first thought. Unfortunately, your SIL will side with your WW and lie for her if he IS there. Check with OMW to see if he's on a trip this week...
