MINDFULL... Time to proceed w/the Big D...

[mindfull]

You know me if you're here.

I have requested a lock on my old thread...

UPDATE:
So, I got the boys off to school (Tuesday), after a few tears, and some phone calls to teachers (asking for grace on a few assignments). I then spent the day in Madison.

Thank you, Ferg. You are a true friend. HUG

I came home calm, and energized, and ready to face the kids again w/a positive spirit.

NOTE: On the way to Madison, I talked to my very best male friend (and his wife, who I am very close to, as well). I gave them the news of a pending divorce, and they were truly shocked. I asked my very best male friend if he would come w/me to my attorney appointment on Wednesday am, as I thought I needed some advice from someone who knows me, knows Paul, knows a bit about our finances, and is incredibly smart (he's a highly successful businessman). He agreed immediately, and we hung up. He called me back a few minutes later, and asked me to seriously consider switching attorney's. He had made a phone call, and had agreement from the best D attorney in the area to take my case, if I want him to. The very best male friend thinks he is the only one that will drill down to the bottom of our "messiness," and also has resources within his office to handle the financial aspect on-site. The attorney only takes four or five cases a year, and thinks mine is one he would love to handle. (Nice. I feel special being in that elite group. NOT)

So, the very best male friend and I are going at 9:30am.

And, last night, I had the chance to tell a few more of my IRL support moms about the D, and I have full support and help from them whenever I need it. (Funny, when we talk, they all want to go for a walk... Wonder how much more weight I'll lose walking and talking...?)

Good evening at home w/the kids, though. I got a flurry of spew txt's from H during the night, which I handled calmly, and requesting support and compassion for the kids... I can't help him. I can't encourage extended spew either. So, mark my words... LESS is MORE when communicating with him.

[Awoken]

Hi Mindful,

I just waded through your previous threads. Wow, you've been through a lot. When I got to the end, and read how your H told your kids he was divorcing you, I teared up.

I've lurked your threads for a long time, never commenting. Today I just wanted to tell you I was out here reading, and wish you the best.

[courageous wife]

(((MF))) Sounds like you have great friends and a wonderful support system in place!

[BobbiJo]

Come here so we can walk and talk!!!

So glad you have such a support system. I think one of my biggest mistakes was trying to hide our separation and D from everyone. In hindsight I know why I did it, because I wasn't DONE and hoped if we could fix things that nobody would ever have to know...it was six months after he moved out before I told anyone other than my mom and sisters. For real! What was I thinking! So having support up front is great.

Good luck at your attorney meeting. I had a great one. Very nice and calming during our first meeting but also let me know he could turn on the 'bad cop' persona if my ex got out of line...

Madison is lucky to have two great guys living there...

[cbih]

As you know, I have kept up with your sitch for months even if I don't have anything to contribute. The recent turn(s) of events have my head spinning so I can't imagine how you must be feeling.

I will be thinking of you today at 9:30. You are handling an extraordinarily difficult situation magnificently (not that I ever believed otherwise) and I, too, am so glad you have such an awesome support system in place (and again...how could it be otherwise?) Best of luck today and always.

[pearlharbr]

Definitely see the shark D attorney, it never hurts to get a second opinion and the best fighter for your sitch. This is not an area where you want to skimp, especially with your complicated finances.

If H is spewing at you through text then just ignore them. There's no law stating you have to respond. You shouldn't accept that type of behavior from anyone. End of story.

It snowed here last night so my motivation to get outside is zero. But I did go to the 6am PB class so that's something!

[newmama]

(((MF))) Sending you strength and comfort. You have such amazing friends! I am glad that they are taking good care of you.

[Serenity13]

(((((Twin))))))

You are in my prayers my friend...You have my number if you need anything

[Virtually_Handsome]

((((((Mindfull))))))
Nothing really to add. But definitely thinking of you. HUGS!

[sandycay]

Hey Sweetie,

I hope your STBXH will stop the spew but don't hold out hope. You've rocked his world and he is not in control. He doesn't do that well.

I am glad you are telling that is one of the hardest parts of it because soon you don't know who knows what. I was sitting at a Softball game the other day and one of the moms asked me where my H was? (Mind you, that FGG has attended a few of these games and sat right beside me) I had to tell her we were divorced. She was blown away. She said right in front of FFG.... Oh, I thought this was your H's brother. Awkward and they couldn't look any different as I have upgraded! LOL

Make sure yours is an upgrade as well. Okay that's not nice. My BFF after the first bomb pulled me out every morning for a walk. It's good for the soul!