Sunny, I dont know what to say except that sometimes luck or life or whatever you want to call it, fill some pieces of the puzzle, gives us -some at least of- the answers...
So your H is being more honest with you than with the OW... How sad these men act and are.
About the text jumping around when typing: there is a button on the tool bar when you are replying. The down area makes the text area larger and then it doesn't jump around. You will see it the next time you reply to a message. The up and down arrow thing on the right. Didn't that just sound so technical???
"Is there a benefit for you to allow the divorce to stretch out so far over time?" @Gypsy
At this point, there really is no disadvantage, except, of course, that I'm not quite married & not quite divorced. It has also allowed me to get my ducks in a row, taking care of all our dental work, car repairs, wardrobe renewal, etc., while I can.
I have a really strong attorney that I'm using for our MSA, although I represented myself (you know what they say about that:)when he took me to court for child custody. I came out very well on that front, however, I do know my limitations.
So, while I'm not fighting him on getting a D, I'm not doing any of the work either. Just living my life to the best of my ability, and honestly, I find that I don't think of him much anymore. (Or is that think much of him?)
@Kalni-Yes, funny how pieces of the puzzle come by you, even when you're not looking! In a city the size I live in, it's amazing how many connections there really are.
@Cynmad-Thanks for the text bouncing info, it's made my typing much more calm!
Off for the beach...my kids are still out for Easter break.
What I didn't add about the strange meeting w/OW's friend, is that he told me he had been married for 20 yrs, then engaged to someone a few yrs back. After the "aha" moment, I find out it was OW he was engaged to, until she broke it off about 4 yrs ago. About the time she set her sites on my H, I'm guessing-;)
He asked me if I'd like to get together to talk further. I told him I'd get back to him after 48hrs, so yesterday I sent him this;
E HO `I KA WA`A; MAI HO`OPA`A AKU I KA `INO.
Make the canoe go back; do not insist on heading into a storm.
--Mary Kawena Pukui
Apparently not direct enough, because he sends a response telling me we need to get together due to the "beshert" forces @ work. Besides, he's really attracted to me & thinks we need to explore that. Right.
I don't think I want to know anything more about her, them, him. I've let enough of my life be taken up with OW. It begins to feel like if I continue giving her pieces of it, I'm allowing her to steal slices that I can't get back.
So, I don't think a response is necessary, or advisable.
@Kalni>>Actually, I have somewhat of a desire to know more, but it's out-weighed by other considerations, by far.
So, H is all of a sudden showing up everywhere. Yesterday at a B-Day party @ Chuck-E-Cheese's (started @ 9a.m. ), I turn around, & there he is again, just stopping by on his way back from surfing in Mexico. Later that day, calling to say he was driving right by the house on his way to our friends house for tacos, what are we up to the rest of the day. Can he come by to pick up S7. Calling again, he's on his way home from friend's home.
Thanks for the offer, we already have plans all day. I tried to sit at the other end of the baseball field Saturday, but he has another chair set up right beside him. I feel nothing, although I do occassionally almost put my hand over on his arm. Maybe just from habit.
Anyway, nothing's really changed. It took me a while to get to this place & I'm not going back. If he wants to changed anything, it's going to be him doing the work. I think he's starting to get that it's not his decision any longer.
I just got a call from a friend of mine, his wife "...just decided she didn't want to be married anymore." I don't know why this stuff shocks me, but it does. He says she was telling him she was happier than she's ever been in their 21yrs together, just 3 weeks before that. I asked if there was OP, "oh no, I don't think there's anyone else, why do you ask?"
I remember first coming on here & someone asking that question. I had the same response.
This is kinda along the lines of, "How much do ya really want to know."
I'm a friend of my S17 on Facebook. On one hand it's good to have some kind of contact point, as he doesn't share a lot with me now-a-days, if you KWIM.
So, my question is, "Is it worth the sick feeling I sometimes get from some of the things on his FB page?"
@Gypsy>>>"Were you effected/affected? by the quake in Baja?
What bothers you?"
Actually, the only way the earthquake effected me was reading on my son's FB; "That wasn't an earthquake, it was me with your mom." To his credit, that was removed pretty quickly.
It gets pretty crude & obnoxious, sharing on a whole new level than I anticipated, and I'm not easily offended.
I really enjoyed talking with you the other day, by the way, you're pleasurably engaging on many levels. We'll have to do it again!
@Kalni>>>"...it is worth it if you ask me."
I think I'll take a break from keeping up with him for the time being. Could be that it's hard to read things about your child, just as I'm sure it is for him to have TMI about me.
), I turn around, & there he is again, just stopping by on his way back from surfing in Mexico.