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The OM had no issue speaking with me when I called him. His admissions are he should had never started to talk to her about personal issues and let it go on as long. He would like for me to believe that he is avoiding her as much as he can. He tells me he is sick of walking on eggshells at work and this whole situation has caused more problems then it was ever worth. He expressed to me several times how much his son means to him and the thought of losing his family is not something he can bare.

My W on the other hand does not see what she was/is doing would be considered an A. She think she was "talking to someone who listens" and made a friend. My wife has no friends to be honest as mentioned in a previous post we had done everything together for a very long time besides our work places we had no social life (more so her). I have a group of friends who I hung around with, I play sports as well. She had work and then her home life. So when her only friend (me) hurt her she desperately seek someone else to talk to and vent and she ended up finding it in him since he could relate to her situation.


M: 27, W: 25
Together since: 01/31/00
M: 10/4/09 (8 Months)
ILBNILWY: 01/24/10
EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted).
Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10
Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
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OIN, sounds like your W needs to find a good core group of female (marriage friendly) friends.


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Seeing how your friend works for the OM and has the ability to monitor his interaction with your wife......I wouldn't do anything that could eventually put heat on your friend! Use his eyes and ears. Your wife is the pursuer of this friendship!

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OK OIN, lt me ask this then... Cops are usually pretty good at spotting when someone is BS'ing them

Do you think OM is lying to you at all or do you think he's being completely sincere? I am just wondering if he's hiding anything from you at all...

I just don't know if he's trustworthy here... and your wife clearly isn't

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Originally Posted By: Allen A
OK OIN, lt me ask this then... Cops are usually pretty good at spotting when someone is BS'ing them

Do you think OM is lying to you at all or do you think he's being completely sincere? I am just wondering if he's hiding anything from you at all...

I just don't know if he's trustworthy here... and your wife clearly isn't


Of course he isn't trustworthy. He's a PREDATOR.

This is like trying to reason with the fox, to ask him NOT to raid the henhouse.

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Pup, I am thinking he may have toned things down... OIN put the fear of God into him some time ago... from the reports he's getting from the workplace OM isn't chasing OIN's wife anymore, she just wont' leave OM alone at work... she keeps following him around.

I am thinking he may have learned his lesson when he was humiliated at work... its a shame you have to publically humiliate people to get them to act like adults...

I guess I want to believe he's grown up a bit.. I just wanted OIN's opinion on it... since he has direct experience with the dude

Last edited by Allen A; 03/26/10 02:53 PM.
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public humiliation works just as well on kids too!! laugh


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lol

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Originally Posted By: mindfull
Allen - Pardon the interruption... What's a multi-LBS?


Means you've been burned more than once my freind


You will see LBS here quite often, usually referring to the poster

It means Left Behind Spouse...

You have a wayward, or wandering spouse and the Abandoned Spouse or the one Left Behind

Multi obviously just means its happened to you a few times... often by the same person (serial affair commiters)

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Unexpectedly this morning after my W left for work OMW called me (3am). She heard from OM that we had spoke and she wanted to hear from me what it was all about. I told her what my friend had told me and that I had to call him.

She said that OM expressed to her that he wants this to all end that he is approaching his breaking point and he does not want to lose his family. As I was talking to OMW, OM called her so she had to hang up. She called back a little while later which I did not expect and said that OM is on his way home. She had told him she had a bad dream about the situation and as a result he left work and went home.

OMW did tell me that OM had said "It's not me he should be worried about it is the other people she talks to now." I questioned my friend about this and he said he really does not see anything else going on, where as with OM it was obvious.

From what I have gathered through-out this whole thing, my W was/is the pursuer.

=======>

On another note, my W returns home from work today and said "I need to call the insurance co." she has a crack in her windshield and needs to get it fix. Her insurance is at our old address and she has yet to change it so she said "I still have to change the address with them...but whats the point I'll be changing it again soon anyway" implying she will be moving out so she would have to change her address again.

I kept my blinders up as best I could. I just walked away and sat down. It was tough because that was the first time in two weeks she had mentioned leaving.


M: 27, W: 25
Together since: 01/31/00
M: 10/4/09 (8 Months)
ILBNILWY: 01/24/10
EA confirmed: 02/10/10 (Busted).
Road to Reconcile began: 07/10/10
Retrouvaille: 09/10/10
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