I totally agree with you Greek. This would have been easier for me had she just messed around and come begging back on her hands and knees. But the fact that she (thinks she) loves him makes this 100 times worse.
I totally agree with you Greek. This would have been easier for me had she just messed around and come begging back on her hands and knees. But the fact that she (thinks she) loves him makes this 100 times worse.
I found the phone number.
Some Paths start of rocky before they smooth out. But what matters is that you act.
And I do believe it would not have been easier. Just a different hurt.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
is she attracted to strong, confident men who are able to walk away from someone who disrespects and dishonors them, or is she attracted to men that are willing to share her, or does she hate me so much that it doesnt matter what I do?
Okay, so she just called about the dogs. (Remember, she's still letting them out at lunch, and took a 1/2 day today to do laundry before heading home to see her folks.)
I remained calm the entire time. I asked her about apartment hunting, and she said it was looking better (finding a place that allows pets is tough here). I told her she didn't need to, that she could come home if she wanted. She admitted she'd thought about it. I asked her if she missed all the little things, she said yes. She said she didn't ever want to lose our friendship, and I told her I still wanted more - she said she didn't know if she did. I took this okay, since it's all I've been hearing for the last month +, and it wasn't a flat out "no." I told her to think about it. If she needs time apart that's fine, but just think about it.
I also told her the affair was cowardly and wrong, and that she's a better person than that. I know it's wrong to attack her, but I did it in a calm voice and she didn't get defensive.
She said she'd think about it over the weekend and call me Sunday. I know she misses the house, misses the security, misses my family, and desperately misses the dogs. She misses our friendship and all the little things. She just doesn't know if she still wants a marriage, but she still cares for me.
This felt like a positive step to me. We talked about her leaving in a calm, rational manner for the first time, and she voiced doubts. She's not 100% sold on divorce. For the first time since she dropped the bomb I feel like I have my foot in the door.
What do I do now? Do I sabotage the first real conversation we've had about the relationship without me being clingy/weepy/angry by calling the other slime's wife now? The timing couldn't work out worse. At any rate, his wife's at work and I don't know where that is, so it would have to wait until this weekend anyway when he's out doing his super cool cop stuff.
I'm going to sleep on this one. Any advice is welcome.
Some will say the timing is important...the way I see it here is you are thinking you've made some progress and don't want to rock the boat.
She is cheating on you- what do you think she'll be doing until Sunday?!
I would contact OMW whie the iron is hot- you mentioned earlier being fearful of ruining another M----he is ruining his own M. Think about his W sitting there buyig his BS...you have the key to bring her to reality as well.
I outed OM1 to his GF--she loves me now, thanks me everyday for letting her know...and the good news is OM1 is out of the picture completelt- the bad news is W is now w/ OM2...who is single and did not choose his GF over my W.
Am I better off? Not at all, but I helped someone else and did what was right.
