She told me that she left because I never took her out(sorry that I worked nights and weekends for 6months straight) I never took her to things that she wanted to do. She told me that this OM talked to her more, wanted to more about her. Well of fricken course he did, you just met you don't know each other and sorry. She said she wants me to just forget about her to let her go. I told her that I couldn't that I know I can still be the one that makes her happy. I told her I dont expect things to change in one night but I should be given another chance(ouch, I wish I stopped that from coming out of my mouth but it is in the past now) She said again that I should just forget about her, that she shouldn't come around as much because seeing her is making it harder for me. (well that is true but not seeing her is just as bad) I told her that How could I forget about her when I see her in everything, hear and smell her in everything.
well needless to say she left and went to her friends apartment. but showed up this morning. I took the right step and just said good morning and then left for work. I don't know if I should be doing a 180 and start taking her to the ballett or symphony which are things she wanted or if I should just totally ignore her. At least I got [censored] off my chest. Any advice?
I like all this empty space because i can now type out things that are important.
Like: D7 S2 starting swimming lessons on 3/30
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue required to fight on..."
Can you really do anything if OM is in the picture??
I effing hate all these sitches (mine included) everything that would make sense doesnt work and everything that does work is essentially psychological and mind games (so to speak).
She said "forget about her." No doubt some script, but also some truth...I say, work whatever 180's you can, but if she's involved w/ OM, I wouldn't take her anywhere. I would let that sitch crumble and just be a better person when and if she comes back.
I find I am happier not dealing w/ W- sure, i'm tempted to contact her, but I always end up hurt when I do.
OM is in the picture in my sitch so I'll let the two be scandelous infidels and i'll keep my side of the street clean.
maynard, I just read some of your first post from a while ago. Man what you are saying in your first two post is exactly what I am going through. I'm going to go back and read more of it. I feel as though everything I do wether it be hardcore DB or just going with my gut is wrong. I'm trying to mix everything I can. And see or hope that it works. I dunno. Apparently she and OM have stopped talking but she has been lying to me since DEC so how can I trust what she is saying now.
I can tell you that I have made a huge flip and that is for me to just have a better attitude towards all aspects of my life. I've stopped resisting God and his will and I'm trying slowly but surely to trust and have more Faith in him. My attitude is improving and right now I can honestly say that I don't feel like someone is sitting on my chest any more. My stomach isn't in knots. We'll see what happens
I like all this empty space because i can now type out things that are important.
Like: D7 S2 starting swimming lessons on 3/30
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue required to fight on..."
OMG this post is AWESOOOOME!! I think i will be reading it on a day to day basis cause man it not only motivates but it makes me realize i'm not making as many mistakes as I thought.
So I'm wondering about 180's my W says that we never went out, that she always wanted to go to the ballett or a symphony or something like that. Is it a valid 180 to take her to it or is that going against. "Do not make dates" This is where I am confused. I seem to be doing better with not talking about our relationship. She actually said she missed me yesterday. But I'm taking it with a grain of salt.
Other than that I have been feeling great. Reading the Prayers section really helps.
The light at the end of my tunnel is getting brighter. Right now I am feeling good and I don't want it to stop. I find that when I work out and I let out all my emotion while doing it. I am in a better mood when my W comes over, and I'm less likely to talk about the R and M.
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue to fight on...."
I like all this empty space because i can now type out things that are important.
Like: D7 S2 starting swimming lessons on 3/30
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue required to fight on..."
Why don't YOU start going out alone and make it be known that you ARE going out and changing your lifestyle. Start doing the things she supposedly ALWAYS wanted to do on your own.
While not inviting her, in a few weeks when she mentions your new active, single and alone social and cultural schedule (resentfully, which she will), drop the hint that she's free to join you and leave it up to her. You'll be going regardless with your male friends, relatives, and alone. Thus, it's not "about her" but implies that it could be.
Why don't YOU start going out alone and make it be known that you ARE going out and changing your lifestyle. Start doing the things she supposedly ALWAYS wanted to do on your own.
While not inviting her, in a few weeks when she mentions your new active, single and alone social and cultural schedule (resentfully, which she will), drop the hint that she's free to join you and leave it up to her. You'll be going regardless with your male friends, relatives, and alone. Thus, it's not "about her" but implies that it could be.
Great Advise!
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
maynard, eric and rr. thank you for your advice. Now I need help on something else. My W text me yesterday asking for sex. Of course I want to but I want to because i'm still in love with her. My C suggested that I don't because it is me abusing myself, and letting her cake eat. She has told me that the R with OM is over but again I don't believe her. She says she hasn't had sex with OM but I don't believe her. But I like sex, with her. I have no intention of going outside my marriage and never have. Do I have sex with her or don't I? I know it will hurt maybe not right away but I know that I am going to ultimately hope that it brings us back together. Which I don't know if it will. It was satisfying not giving into her yesterday.
I like all this empty space because i can now type out things that are important.
Like: D7 S2 starting swimming lessons on 3/30
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue required to fight on..."
