Separated, new baby, but still hopeful

[mindfull]

I make guacamole all the time! Love it! Have yet to make a good salsa. Do you like those fairly new blue corn chips? YUM!

Now, I'm hungry!!!

Oh, and hey, I want to see some more strategy communicated here. You're kind of flying by the seat of your pants... Not like you! LoL

[newmama]

Hey, I was JUST thinking that I needed strategy!I feel lost though...like I've been doing the same things and now what.

My plan before involved cooking, cleaning, looking good, being mysterious, not ever texting/calling/emailing, GALing, being busy.

Then last week I shared some of my mystery (belly dancing and wii) and made babysitting plans with WH for going out to a wine meet up but haven't told him where I am going.

Then I stopped cooking "for" him, but am still doing it for myself, cleaning, looking good 4/5 times, but then I started sending a text or 2 about S (of course). And he replies eagerly.

So I am spinning my wheels. Now what? Part of me just wants to go about my life, looking good still (haha) and not talk about relationship stuff but just take a break from trying anything else.

Then I consider that I haven't been the one to initiate doing stuff together since maybe November...and I did last week when I suggested we went to the park. He willingly went along. So should I be doing more initiating of family stuff?

Then Lotus suggested I let him do acts of service which I agree with.

Spinning my wheels here...input? suggestions?

[newmama]

salsa ingredients that WH uses: roma tomatos, onion, garlic, jalepeno or serrano peppers, apple cider vinegar,cilantro,lime juice, salt, cumin.... I think that's it!

[newmama]

oh and the casserole sounds yummy! but could I substitute cream of celery or potato soup or something instead of mushroom???

[4luv]

newmama,

I have been reading your thread and think that in regards to what you are doing you should continue on the path you are on. Remember that these things take time to REALLY see some changes. I think your husband is almost intrigued by you again which is a good thing so don't slip back into texting him or planning outings with him (even if it is your son) just yet. A man wants what he can't have and he needs to see you continue to be fabolous and get more interested in you while at the same time he also needs to be feeling nervous about you possibly not being an option for him. Keep doing your outings, GAL, cooking, and being mysterious. He isn't quite where you need him to be yet IMO but his eagerness to hang out with you and son, responding to texts does show him being interested. Don't show your hand too soon...keep your cards (feelings/emotions) close.

[mindfull]

Newmama -

I agree w/4Luv, especially after you re-capped. Keep on doing it... It's just fun to hear your ideas on the mysterious, what you're doing to GAL, etc... You are DEFINITELY intriguing him to some degree. Keep it up, girlfriend!!!

I would use Cream of Celery! That sounds good, too.

How's the belly-dancing skirt? LoL That makes me smile!!!

[chatterbug]

Well I know of an act of service I REALLY NEED, lol!

Heh me too. Next relationship theres going to be lots of catching up for lack of services over the last year....

[newmama]

4luv and Mindfull, thank you for the feedback! So I can work on doing more GALing, finding another mysterious thing (I think?) and not stress about initiating family outings or texting...oops I sent him a video text of S today...but I am not hooked on contacting him so I can cut it off again!

I will save that casserole recipe for a weekend meal!

OK tomorrow's plan...he will be 8 hours:
-will wear tank top and PJ bottoms when he arrives
-drink coffee,wake up gradually, maybe chat about current events,work on crossword, make breakfast
-work out/get ready

-clean and organize (boring but necessary)

-??maybe go to home improvement store and pick up materials for toybox or go to bedbathbeyond for a cast iron dutch oven
(I really would like WH to go with me but shouldn't ask, right?)

-prepare my dinner (baked chicken rolled in seasoned, crushed tortilla chips -recipe on back of mission tortilla chip bag)
with reheated verde rice and refried beans w/ chopped onions & cheese

I do have things that he could help me with. I'll try to ask for favors or hint or something...

[newmama]

Cutter, it is amazing what a little abstinence will do for the libido....

[mindfull]

Newmama - I hear ya!

And, geez, Cutter is really stepping out of the box w/that comment! LoL

Dinner sounds fab! Wish I wouldn't have already planned mine!