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I see your point Puppy, but I think with my WAW this is not the time to play too hard to get. I know that she needs to feel like I want to be near her and that I miss her. Not to the point that I am pleading for her or persuing or making any demands of her, but that I simply be honest and pay some attention to her when she makes the first move.

There are lots of people here who would be thrilled to be at this point with their WAW. I have made a lot of mistakes this time around, but sometimes I need to go with my gut based on what I know about my WAW.


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Refresh my memory -- is there OM in the situation? I can't remember.

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[quote=BeTheMan]I see your point Puppy, but I think with my WAW this is not the time to play too hard to get. I know that she needs to feel like I want to be near her and that I miss her. Not to the point that I am pleading for her or persuing or making any demands of her, but that I simply be honest and pay some attention to her when she makes the first move.

[/quote

There are plenty of ways to do that, short of a "Sure" the very first time she pulls your string. "That sounds really nice, but I'm sure you can understand my reluctance, considering all that's happened. Let me give it some thought, and we can discuss it sometime soon" would be much more appropriate, in my opinion.

There's a huge gulf between "hard to get" and an immediate "Sure!"

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Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
Refresh my memory -- is there OM in the situation? I can't remember.

Puppy


You can never say never, but I really don't think so.


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Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
[quote=BeTheMan]I see your point Puppy, but I think with my WAW this is not the time to play too hard to get. I know that she needs to feel like I want to be near her and that I miss her. Not to the point that I am pleading for her or persuing or making any demands of her, but that I simply be honest and pay some attention to her when she makes the first move.

[/quote

There are plenty of ways to do that, short of a "Sure" the very first time she pulls your string. "That sounds really nice, but I'm sure you can understand my reluctance, considering all that's happened. Let me give it some thought, and we can discuss it sometime soon" would be much more appropriate, in my opinion.

There's a huge gulf between "hard to get" and an immediate "Sure!"

Puppy



Got it. Too late now, but what I won't do is bring it up. I will ensure she makes the offer and then not respond immediately and still positively, but choose my words carefully.


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Originally Posted By: BeTheMan
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
Refresh my memory -- is there OM in the situation? I can't remember.

Puppy


You can never say never, but I really don't think so.


OK. Because it would change my advise greatly if there were, for obvious reasons.

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WAW just left after the usual Sunday dinner with S16, she and I.

While she was making dinner she caught me looking down her top. She said "I can show them to you" and that's what she did. That led to some fondling in the kitchen, including her touching me "there".

Thankfully (well...in some ways) I stopped it. Good thing too, since S16 came downstairs and into the kitchen moments later.

We then had dinner together and she left right after since she was tired. We never even played Scrabble she was so looking forward to. She said she would like us all to have dinner this Wed and asked for a kiss when she left.

What the heck do I make of this and where do I go from here????


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MIXED signals BTM MIXED signals - it's just what they do!

Do not trust what she does or says - just keep working on YOU. Do not pursue her.


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
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No problem with not persuing. I can play it cool. Even though I need a freezing cold shower now!!!

She is making all the moves now: asking if we can date again, suggesting dinner an extra night this week etc.


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BTM...I really envy you. With the way my sitch has gone I dont think I could dream of being even close to where you are in terms of DB success.

Whatever you've done has apparently worked...and you should be congratulated for it.

I only wish we could all be as far along in success as you.


Me - 32
EX - 26
D - 3

BOMB: 11/02/09
EA/PA confirmed 1/29/10

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1953269
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