...why give advice if someone is going to argue all the points of it?
If Kevin is doing so well with his plan...then let him.
If Kevin is not...then maybe he should open his ears and shut his yap.
just a thought.
I am not arguing with their advice. Of course, here I am disagreeing with you. Ironic. LOL.
Anyways, I am just stating my thought process. So far it has worked with other family members. If you find something that works, aren't you supposed to keep at it? Isn't that what MWD says?
The first step to repairing our M is going to have to be repairing the R's that surround it. There is a better chance of W returning someday if her whole family is not against me than there is if I repair nothing with the rest of the family. That is my thinking anyways.
Feel free to 2x4 if you disagree. Just make sure you explain why.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
If your W REALLY wanted to be with you, what her family or friends thought would be a non issue. When people WANT to reconcile or at least try and get on that path they will no matter what outside factors don't support or approve the reconciliation. That is why.
If you find something works WITH YOUR SPOUSE keep at it.
Disagree on the family member thing. Got nothing to do with your relationship with your wife.
Face the real issues, Kevin. Quit avoiding them and focusing on peripheral things like whether the church thinks you're married or whether your MIL likes you ....
Eliminate the noise. Ask yourself the hard questions. Take a good look in the mirror. Face your fears.
Man up, for crying out loud.
Everybody hurts. It's part of life. Don't miss the good stuff.
If your W REALLY wanted to be with you, what her family or friends thought would be a non issue. When people WANT to reconcile or at least try and get on that path they will no matter what outside factors don't support or approve the reconciliation. That is why.
That is a good point and I won't disagree. I think it also helps to have support of a decision to reconcile than to have rejection to it if someone starts going back on the fence about it or even moving towards that direction.
But you are correct CG.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Do you think her family approved of her sleeping with other men? Did that stop her?
Her dad didn't care. He was for whatever makes her happy. Her mom was initially against it. I don't know where she stands now.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Just want to point out that, as 25 has told you a butt-load of times here, truly moving on is the ONLY way that she will ever be attracted to you again. There's no guarantee that she ever will be attracted to you again regardless...but it's pretty foolproof that if you don't truly move on...she NEVER will be attracted to you again! I'm not trying to hurt you Kevin. I'm on your side.
Thanks Antlers. I think I can show moving on without bringing a date to a family birthday dinner for D8. I just don't think that would reflect well in any light especially to the kids. There are other ways to show I have moved on though. By completely focusing on my kids tonight and showing no real attention to W is one way.
Kevin
No longer feeling the need to have her in your life was what I meant by truly moving on.
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
