I have another one very seriously hinting, asking me my jewelry preferences, and one who will never ask. *sigh*
(((J))) I love that you have Big City Luvin in mooseville. It does certainly get better.. muah..
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I am still rolling strong with my girl..... Next Summer, I am doing it again, this time for good!! I am so happy things turned out the way they did for me, I couldn't imagine there would be someone so loving and caring for me in this world! You are right girl! Things happen for a reason!!! Give me an update!!!!
Bravey, how wonderful Congrats..You are a big softy on the inside we all knew. :-) Merry Christmas to you and your honey and those babies.
Yes, I was able to work some programs and keep my home... The X Does the best he can.
I am good thanks for asking and No nothing as serious as you have. Things are great just the way they are.
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I wonder if I should update here???
Please do Billy sweetie.. So good to see you.
Have a very Merry Christmas and Happy New year peeps.
Live Simply Love Generously Care Deeply Speak Kindly Leave the rest to God
An update is in order and I can't sleep tonight soooooooooooo.......
Where to begin, let's see, ahhhhhhhh maybe here.
I last was on the boards a couple of years ago just before my D. At the time my XW was still spinning but had slowed down some with the birth of her 1st child with OM. With the birth of that child came a sudden change for the worse, she decided and used her contacts within the system to get her new family onto the welfare system. She walked away from her job of almost 20 years, and it was a damn good job too. Around this time she began to plan and scheme and became very bitter towards me, plotting my demise so to speak.
There were no real concerns from her about our kids, except the money they represented on the welfare system.
Here in Canada we have something called a child tax benifit. In a nutshell it's a monthly payment based on income to the parents of children. I knew that we (as a family) didn't qualify as our income was too high but what I didn't know was that she had been recieving payments through a disability section of the program as our kids are disabled.
Soooooooo..........
She begins, she quits paying CS, claims to welfare that she has sole custody and suddenly shows an interest in the kids asking to have them overnight more often etc. She runs out and gets herself a new place to live with all the trimmings and the bills that come along with them.
During this time I had done the work and realized my mistakes and made some positive changes in myself. I had met A wonderfull woman and life was good, very good. My GF and I traveled and were living pretty large, really enjoying ourselves and what life has to offer. My GF and I were going semi slow and keeping our kids out of this budding R untill we were sure it would last.
My XW didn't like this one bit but she kept it very well hidden and put up a very good front, offering to have the kids when I would travel etc. It was all part of her scheme only she had forgotten just who she was plotting against.
One sunny morning I recieved a phone call, one that would be life altering for one of us. The caller told me they were representing my XW in collecting arrears of CS. I was very confused and the fact that the snotty arrogant caller was not listening to me made me very very angry and set the wheels in motion. It would seem that XW had lied to welfare about custody and claimed the kids were living with her. She was coming into alot of welfare money and they wanted thier money out of me.
Ever try to fight the government? Let me tell you it isn't easy and I'll tell you that it takes a toll, but I did and won. XW now was showing her bitterness and began to use the kids as pawns in this little scheme of hers.
The fight with the government and XW's bullcrap wore me out physically and I got very ill, lost a ton of weight and ended up in the hospital for a few days.
Wishing you and your family a very happy, safe, and blessed holiday season.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
As I lay in the ER I asked my GF to call XW to see if she wanted to take the kids during my stay, if not she would take care of them. My XW agreed and became rather distraught that I may die. My GF let her stew and didn't exactly tell her I would NOT die.
An hour or so later as I lay in the ER talking with my GF the curtain flies open and there stands XW demanding to know what is wrong with me. (They say a picture is worth a thousand words but I didn't get a pic so the description will have to suffice.) It was Mimi, remember the Drew Carey Show from years ago? She was Mimi, Mimi makeup, Mimi hair, wearing tight low rise jeans, a too short low cut shirt that didn't cover her protruding belly some hideous tall fur trimmed animal skin boots with a matching coat. She looked the part of a cartoon 70's coke addicted prostitute.
I told her to leave and she began to cry but left, or did she. A little later as I spoke with the doctor my GF pointed out to me a pair of hideous boots poking out from beneath the curtain. The doctor opened the curtain and told her to leave and she left, or did she. Around a half hour later XW throws open the curtain and begging loudly spewing at my GF in an attempt to bait her into a fight, GF stays calm says nothing and hits the security button. Security sees what's going on and just before they get the grab on my XW she says to me "Next time you get a GF get one that's pretty." Security had to lock down the ER to finally get her out of the hospital and I had to assume my GF last name to keep XW from finding me there while I was admitted.
Well I healed up and was told to lose my stress one way or another, that is to say either give her the kids and walk away or finish her so badly that she quits and walks.
So it begins................ I decided to go down fighting...........
Remember the Child tax benefit I spoke of earlier, I made a few calls and was surprised to find that I was entitled to it and that they were going to back pay me to the date of SEP, oh yes, they would also be wanting that money to be repaid to them by XW, I believe they used the word fraud.
When this hit the fan XW decided that she was going to go out in a blaze of glory, I had returned home at midnight after a few beers at a friends house to receive a call from the police that XW was on her way over to commit suicide in front of me, and would I hold her/ stop her for them if they didn't get here in time. I asked them how she was armed and they didn't know, I armed myself and waited because I knew in my gut she didn't intend to go out alone that night.
Well she didn't show up, they caught her en route and she got a trip to the mental ward and some charges out of it.
After this and a couple times of her removing the kids from school for days and going into hiding I got some orders that prevented her from this sort of thing, I slapped them on her parents as well as my XMIL had become very jealous of my R with GF and sympathetic to XW's plight.
Things get better, XW is pretty much gone and leaving me and mine alone, GF and I take a break as the drama is getting to her and I am out and about living large again. Hmmmmm seems to be a pattern here, just when things get good XW shows her colors again.
One sunny day as I am washing my brand new motorcycle XW shows up and spews off big time in front of the kids, she finishes up with smashing me in the face with a slurpee, uh oh, wrong thing to do, she ends up being convicted of assualt.
So the tally is for those who care: 2 fraud charges (unsure if convicted) 1 attempted suicide 1 assualt conviction Repayment of fraud monies to the tune of $25000 An at fault car accident totaling her car without insurance And pregnant yet again at the age of 40
Boy XW's grass sure is greener............
The last of it and the finishing blow was her 3rd and I think final attempt at custody.
The court case played out like a very bad Judge Judy episode. There was XW and her supporters ( XMIL and 5 or 6 aunts) XW is looking great in her very short mini skirt, tight fitting low cut shirt and pregnant belly showing. Her cheering section is sure of victory as I hear them whisper amongst themselves. XW presents her case for over an hour, nothing of substance just false accusations and some very bold lies. The judge told her several times to stop as she was digging a hole for herself. My defence was simple and very effictive, the financials we had to submit showed that XW was living in the red to the tune of $1500 per month, almost exactly the amount she would recieve if she were to gain custody.
Long story short is that the judge agreed with me and actually reduced her visitation.
On my way out of the court room I was threatened my my XMIL, I yelled out "Don't hit me again" and now XMIL is in some trouble as well.
I went back to living well, having fun and well, just being me. The kids were doing great and it's like it didn't even phase them. GF and I slowly get back together over the last 9 months and are stronger than ever, that break was necessary for both of us, to be sure this is what we want. My house will go on the market this spring and hers after we buy another. Our kids are now included in our R and get along well. I guess I can honestly say I am content with things these days.
As for XW, I don't see much of her anymore and only hear from her when she wants me to send $$$ with the kids for food. I send nothing and tell her if she can't feed them she shouldn't see them.
I guess I post up some thoughts and stuff for the newbies here sometime later, probably very similar to my Lissies original post.
