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BTW, yesterday I said "Good job" before adding on my comments... I meant it. I simply pointed out an even better way to go about it in the future.

Indy/BTM there is a reason why Coach said:
I don't think you can pull off this vacation without harming your efforts
and why Puppy is backing him up. I also agree, but from your past performance, and mule-headedness to go through with it, it's pointless to arguing with you.


This:
Originally Posted By: BeTheMan
I have mentioned before that my WAW is totally hot.
Along with this:
Originally Posted By: BeTheMan
Cutter - no promises on the drinking thing. It is all inclusive after all!

Is going to be your downfall.

You're setting yourself up for disaster. I can prepare you for what to expect and how to handle it, but I don't think you will read and apply. Why? Because you're feeling a little better this week and are starting to get too cocky. Anything I say will be a waste.


M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married
4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
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I am just curious as to why you W is going on this vacation with you? If it's a family vacation and she opted to leave the family why is she still included?

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City Girl read pages 1 to 58... wink

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BTM,
Your thread title caught my attention, just read the whole thing.

I must say, from the outside it's obvious that she's using that event as an excuse. And I disagree that she has worked through the past abuse. She wouldn't be acting this way if she had. The family death, illness, everything is coming back to the surface. The drinking and wrist-cutting is really scary.

She does seem to be making it fairly clear that she doesn't want a D. And I know that's a crumb, but it's a positive.

My heart hurts for you man. It's obvious how much you love her, and want to make this work. Stay in counseling! Keep working on your stuff!

The advice from the pro's here has helped me immensely. I've disagreed with Puppy on other threads, but that's just because I don't know what I'm talking about. If you or any other pros have advice, I'm desperate right now:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1896116&page=16


Me: 30
W: 28
T 8, M 6
S: 7-27-2007
W filed (again) 3-2011
Served 8-2011
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"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
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Checking in before we leave for Mexico early tomorrow morning.

I think WAW may be spending the night at my house since we fly out very early. She may even sleep in my bed. But I have no intention of making anything out of it. She will simply lie on the other side of my bed. No big deal.

We will not be sharing a room while at the resort, as per my suggestion and we are not buying XMAS presents for each other.

I am finally getting a little excited about the vacation.

I will report back on how things went when I return.

Merry Christmas to all!!!


50 years old.

Ontario, Canada

Loving Marriage #2 with the perfect person.


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Merry Christmas BTM! Excited to hear how it goes. I'm convinced she still loves you and it will show on this trip, just remember to give her space, and take a break if your emotions go crazy. Have fun!


Me: 30
W: 28
T 8, M 6
S: 7-27-2007
W filed (again) 3-2011
Served 8-2011
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I'm back from the family vacation in Mexico. I hope everyone had a great Christmas.

Things did not start out well on the vacation (WAW was crying first hour we were at resort) but by the end of the second day, it was almost like a "normal" family trip. We wound up having a good time - and most importantly the kids enjoyed their week.

We were back Sunday and had dinner together last night at my house and kids opened their presents.

Rather than go into full details - any questions?


50 years old.

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Loving Marriage #2 with the perfect person.


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welcome back. Its cold today eh BTM.

Did you bring us any gifts ?


Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul.
unconditional love is awesome!
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Two questions for a start...

Did she get the hint that you were checking out the competition?
Did she catch you going all ga-ga-eyed at her?

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Originally Posted By: Gnosis
Two questions for a start...

Did she get the hint that you were checking out the competition?
Did she catch you going all ga-ga-eyed at her?


A) I think she did. But, she has never been the jealous type, so very little reaction.

B) Nope - because I didn't. I will admit that we kissed a couple of times though. Just little kisses on the lips though. Nothing major.


50 years old.

Ontario, Canada

Loving Marriage #2 with the perfect person.


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