The holiday season for me gets worse not better every year.
First XH left exactly one month before Christmas. Next there was the coming and going on Christmas day first year of him and latterly of the children so that they get to see each other. Last year it was my S17 not being here to eat with us. This year OW is expecting a baby on Christmas day. That particular pain will be there for evermore.
T allow yourself to grieve and most importantly LOVE YOURSELF. It took me 42 years to do this but now that I can I am a different person (and people are telling me this without me even having to say anything)
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Well today is my 22nd wedding anniversary. I never thought I would be spending it alone. I am doing ok though. Can't help but remember my ex saying his vows.......... at that time I know he meant them.
I wonder if he even remembers that day, or if he remembers what day it is.
Regardless, he did not submit to the court the papers he was suppose to for child support. I don't know if he will be in contempt of court. He was also suppose to submit to me his tax return, he never did. I will have to fax the judge to inform him that he never gave me the information. I can't believe it has come to this.
My ex seems so much worse, very confused and forgetful....
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I know how you feel.........our anniversary was in Sept.....I dont think they remember that special day ......when I was 22 I was a WAS 32 yrs. ago.....never did return but I never gave it a second thought.....I just did away with that in my memory....when I look back at that first marriage when I hurt my 1st husband as mine has hurt me I feel such shame....how could I of hurt someone who loved me so much.....same thing with the way I have become a LBS. My mom has always say that what we do here on earth to hurt someone whether it be our spouses,friends,family we will reap what we have sown...as in karma...this must be my karma for that pain of betrayal I imposed on my 1st husband.he is dead now but I did ask him for his forgiveness I pray he heard me
IRMAC, I am sorry you experienced being a WAS in your first marriage. You were very young and probably very naive. The fact that you asked him for forgiveness is such a blessing. Everyone deserves forgiveness when repentence is present. I don't see a lot of repentence in these ML'ers.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
T they can't repent because to do that they would have to admit they have done wrong. Can you imagine what an impact that would have on them. Read the posts of those people on here who have been the WAS and how they felt when they did have the awakening. It's not pretty.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
It always feels like such an accomplishment when you make it through those rough hurdles such as an anniversary.
Ex emailed last night about the tax stuff he never sent me. Of course his attachment did not go through. He also claimed he did not send me the tax stuff because he FORGOT my email address (after 15 years of sending me stuff). It never ends, what ends is how you handle this craziness.
Wishing you all a great day..... Trusting
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
