To all...my atty called me today. STBXW rejected all changes/requests/ etc.
I discussed with my L. Recommendation is to withdraw all and go back to requesting sole custody. STBXW is now becoming 'power hungry'. Sadly, this is not going to be settled. She is ramming this down my throat.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
If you are on-call, I wonder if you could hire someone to also be "on-call" to cover the kids at night.....
Aren't doctors a high-divorce population? I say that with the thoughts that there may be support through a professional organization. Sounds like you need a lawyer who is more familiar with fighting for father's rights...
DF....not sure what is more father's rights than fighting for them. STBXW was bullied as a child. Her parents fought for her. Now..I am labelled as the bully and they are going to stand up to me, punish me,put me dowb etc.
FIB
Last edited by faithisbelieving; 10/31/0905:02 AM.
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
FIB - If you think you want more time with your kids, you have to fight for them - who cares if anyone thinks you are a bully? Once it is set, only a MAJOR change in circumstance can have the issue revisited. You've got one shot.
How can they punish you? What more can they do?
I read a bit about NY custody - says the mother does not automatically have any more rights than the father. Also, a court-appointed atty for the kids will weigh in with what is best for the kids.
Why can't your lawyer enlist the services of a father's rights advocacy group? I'm sure that you are paying her top dollar for her services, seems like something SHE would be on top of, particularly if custody time is primary concern in the settlement agreement.
Is it possible that with a 50/50 arrangement your child support would be reduced enough to afford a nanny for those nights you are on call? I'm sure it's expensive, but as others have chimed in already, once this agreement is made, you'll catch hell trying to get it changed in the future. As far as that goes, what are the possibilities of a change in your schedule that would reduce the amount of overnight on-call responsibility you carry?
I think it's long past time to start playing rough legally with your wife. In your shoes I am inclined to think that I would tell my attorney to pull out all stops to make a proper agreement happen.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
Done....it is about to a begin. It is not what I wanted. I tried. What's that saying? I didn't start it but I'm going to finish it?
In surgery, sometimes it's time to operate when we are stuck..don't have the answers...or the patient is deteriorating. Honestly, I don't see much of an option here except to push the throttle forward. There is a lot that STBXW can bend, truth-wise, to make me look bad. But...there is much fodder for me to show that I am a good father and do much of the caretaking.
If she had said no to 3 things, yes to 3 things and maybe to 3 things, we'd have a shot here. But to shut down EVERYTHING and WITHDRAW my parenting time.........
This won't be pretty....
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Bill....as you see, we are going that path. If I have to, I will get a full-time nanny, downsize, do whatever is necessary. An angry, belligerent, vindictive person should NOT be in control. It's a tough battle in NYS. I may lose, but, where I stand now....it's ridiculous.
The state of NY does NOT award joint custody. It doesn't exist in the legal system. They award only sole custody. Winner takes all.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Same here. Only sole custody and 99% to the mother. I would have to fight if I wanted to offer 50% custody... What can I say? At some point you do what you gotta to do. She doesnt leave you with any other options? Have you talked to her directly about this? Did her lawyer say why she rejected everything? K
Kalni....u can't talk with her. She is on a power trip right now. I have a combatant, not a co-parent; I have a belligerant, not a co-operative.
STBXW said, in response this morning, that SHE is going for sole custody.
My work is cut out for me. What an ugly person she has become. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
