Mmmmm. I'm torn. Listen to the guys of experience on this one, I think.
Although I will say .... she said, "I couldn't hang up on him." Ok, if that's where she is, she's got a ways to go and some work to do. It's very very important (IMHO) for her to be ABLE to hang up on him. She wasn't coerced or threatened back into her marriage. It was her choice. She needs to fully own that. Part of the consequences of that choice is being able to tell outside parties, "NO!" and mean it.
If you run him off, seems to me you're rescuing......
ETA: If she gets to the point where she IS hanging up and he's still calling .... go get him.
Good point. She is a big girl. She can hang up. I should not need to fight this battle.
Scare him off. Your wife will always remember how you were willing to fight for her. that you under no circumstances were willing to have another man try to steal her from you.
Time to contact this A'hole and tell him to get lost!
Who else agrees with this? I am tempted.
Not me, I'm too much of a ufc fan, and I don't have enough discipline yet to keep my MMA skills in check, something in me might want to punch him so hard that he spits his teeth out like watermelon seeds.
With all the personal satisfaction that could be derived from that type of action, I'm not sure I could hold myself back - that's just me being honest.
I don't think i'm unique like that too, that's healthy testosterone speaking.
Time to contact this A'hole and tell him to get lost!
Who else agrees with this? I am tempted.
Not me, I'm too much of a ufc fan, and I don't have enough discipline yet to keep my MMA skills in check, something in me might want to punch him so hard that he spits his teeth out like watermelon seeds.
With all the personal satisfaction that could be derived from that type of action, I'm not sure I could hold myself back - that's just me being honest.
I don't think i'm unique like that too, that's healthy testosterone speaking.
But what is the motivation behind that action, I'm asking myself that right now. If it was me and I was thinking about doing that, why would I be like that?
Am I jealous?
Am I protective?
Over protective?
Angry?
Someone stepped over boundaries and had intimate contact with my wife and now I feel like I have to step over his boundaries and rearrange his molecular structure? (metaphorically speaking)
NO... you're tired of him being part of your life. He's trying to take back your wife, he had her for a bit, he was successful once, he's not going to give up easily because he thinks he can do it again. Notice how he told your wife that you are a 'lucky guy' because she went back to you, and she felt sorry for him when he said that, the feelings still exist in her for him, I doubt you could just extinguish that flame they had so easily.
Being jealous though is insecure - and you AREN'T insecure.
W: "He had a life planned with me. Now its gone." (OK. I could have gone off on this one, but I didn't.) " He is devestated. He told me that he loves me and that he hopes I find peace. He said you are a lucky guy."
obvious now that it wasnt just an emotional affair. sorry but i would have destroyed him if i heard that from my wife. you have more self control then me.
