Thanks Cas - and for being so supportive on my Personal (not Peronal) Positives!!
I never know how to get Gucci - he just appears!!
I do think that you are right - I would hold hopes for more conversation than just the financial meeting so perhaps I should hold tight. It may be that H wants now to see me but just won't give in to saying so and is looking for an excuse! Who knows - afterall, he has said that he misses me at times?
I would say that yes, I do have to tell him about my job. I am frightened that he is going to find out and I have been there already, when I did the five weeks locum, recently. He went ape. He thought that I was trying to withold my financial responsiblity by not telling him. Thing is, I have a month to go before I shall get paid and if someone tells him in the meanwhile, I'm toast. It may also be seen as a 180 in that I have found a job and it will take some pressure off him - which should, in turn, take his pressure off me.
I think that what I might do is give him the choice. I will say that we can have our discussion by phone or we can meet - and leave him to decide - whether he wants to come down or for me to go to him, which has not been an option previously. That feels better ... what do you think??
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Yeah Nell, I have to do something about my GALing. I have tried to have low key weekends to cope with going back to work but the problem is that I am tired and a bit aimless and I don't achieve much except sleeping and lounging around and I am drawn to the pc. Not good. It's a habit I need to break!!!
Oh I am so guilty of that, my friend! What I have found helps me is to get out in to the garden ... I know that you won't be able to do much at the moment but you can take a drink and a book - the weather is changing and so you should enjoy it before it becomes to hot or flysie!
Just sit, read, drink water and let yourself drift. I think that it's a tonic all on it's own and I always feel better when I come back in. The fresh air will do you the world of good and it's great for your skin.
When we feel better, we will GAL ... just takes time after your surgery - and for me, to have a few more like-minded friends, opportunities and money!
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Fantastic list of positives, certainly encouraged me to do my own, although ironically they all look very similar to yours lol!
Im totally with you on the "how can he see me GAL & 180ing" when he is so far away, your one step ahead of me your H has admitted to missing you! thats a biggy means despite what he is getting from his R with OW its still missing something! my H after asking me how I was and my reply was just ok, he stated "some up days and some down days" and I so wanted to say "are you asking me or telling me about you" lol, and every time he has phoned he has been too quick to say "I spose thats my problem" when I never made it to sound like that! No matter how bad they are behaving you can guarantee they are human enough to feel sorrow, loss and guilt exactly like we do! We can only say as I saw in another post..
We are sorry it got into this mess, we take responsibility for our part, but we still want to learn from it and move on! (doing mysteriously as in they dont know if you want to move on with them or move on with someone else)
Honestly I know how hard it is, and Im getting eaten up by the possibility of another woman. Its the one thing for me that rattles my cage, although thankfully he never sees that, and I havent spoken of it all to my S and only slipped up with mother and that sure isnt going to happen again. I not only have to contend with losing my H but knowing that my own family would happily sh*t stir to make it worse..
Like you Im beginning to wonder if a bit more contact would be a good idea but Im sticking it out for a bit longer on the NC front.
Last edited by Lost Rabbit; 09/13/0909:53 AM.
____________________________
W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Thanks Rabbit - yes, I think that I have also decided to stick it out on the nc for another week and see what happens.
I was going to email him that we could meet in the week and talk about stuff (including my new job) but on reflection, I don't think that it will hurt him to wait ... he's made me wait over enough stuff and I'm really p*ssed with him for spending our anniversary weekend with ow .. as he undoubtedly has. Thinking of that helps my resolve to withdraw my wonderful personality from him - that will teach him a thing or two! (Ha! If only).
What are you still doing here Rabbit? You should be writing that list!! Off you hop ...
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Got an email this morning saying that H would get the info for me today (he already said that last night) and said that the insurance does not expire until December. He then added "why the urgency - I'm curious?"
Do I now ignore this or send back a reply saying "need to upgrade to business insurance" ... which would be polite and giving him the tip off about my job, or do I wait and do nothing until he has come up with the goods?!!
Have a good day, people :o)
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Sorry Nell, I have been a bit behind getting around today, been fuming too much over at my thread.
I wouldn't be in a hurry to reply, wait until he gives you what you need, then you can reply.
I wouldn't be telling him you want to upgrade the cover, not just yet anyway, just say you just want to double check the type of coverage you have to make sure it is adequate. Or something like that.
I may be wrong but I just wouldn't give away too much info just yet.
