I think so. Him going out twice a week is business as usual. You going from Ms. Seductress to out on the town is a 180. He's getting comfortable with the cake eating. You may have just reminded him that he has to make a choice.
Good luck with the talk. I really understand being afraid of R talk. We hear all the time avoid it but, is that reasonable? Don't we eventually have to put on our big kid pants and face the issues?
_________________________ Me-41 W-39 M-15 yrs T-17 yrs D-12 S-9 S-8 B 5/08 S 1/09
Hmmm, so I go out looking hot, he's Mr. Grumpy-Puss when I get back (a bit late) and the next morning he's all nostalgia and 'maybe you could sleep in the big bed'.
Ok. For whatever reason, I wasn't drawing a straight line through all of those points.
The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.
My sitch - Divorce Busted! http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
Dia I think hes got his underpants in a serious twist, hes not ready to commit yet (its scares him) but is testing by talking about the future to see if you bite! Its a hard one, saying "im here if you need a chat" is a bit too much laying the doormat out, but ignoring them isnt caring enough.. I totally understand Im concerned that some of my 180's could be construed as the non-caring, revengeful stuff he has accused me off instead of it just being GAL!
____________________________
W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
(((((Dia))))) I think he knows you are there, if he wants to talk to you. I'd keep letting your actions doing the talking, and keeping your mouth closed.
Quote:
For whatever reason, I wasn't drawing a straight line through all of those points.
That's because it's not a straight line! Those all play together, with probably 100 other things, in his confused mind. It's not a normal, logical progression you are working through. It's more of an unscripted, illogical dance, where there might be a thousand ways of getting from the beginning to the end, and there isn't even one end. All you can do is try to infuence the direction the dance goes, but it you push too hard, you get to do a spin, and end up at the other end of the room!
2 cents: I wouldn't necessarily attempt the quadruple salchow of possible r-talk PLUS bed question in the same night. See how the bed thing shakes out. IMHO.
Oh dear ... I didn't even see that pun until it was too late. I refuse to recant, however .....
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
So yesterday, I got my three workflow people together and told them to iron their varied priorities into ONE master list because each one was shifting me from this project to that and very little was getting completed.
Lo and behold, the CEO gave me The Master List.
Do this. Then this. And if anyone bothers you, tell them I said so!
So today I have had two, count 'em, t-w-o, "OMG, OMG, this is ON FIRE. Drop EVERYTHING and do it NOW NOW NOW."
And one of them is the CEO.
Color my eye jaundiced.
Last edited by Dia; 09/11/0909:31 PM.
The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.
My sitch - Divorce Busted! http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
