A Little Epiphany - (and a newbie delurking)

[Dia]

H just called to shower me with surprised thanks and praise for handling the flowers. Hmm, cool. I was a bit concerned he'd not want me meddling.

Re: his mother. Gifts are difficult and touchy for her. First of all, forgetting or not acknowledging one of her milestones is a cardinal offense, and one that H commits all too frequently. If the gift is well chosen, but poorly wrapped, then you simply didn't care enough about her to wrap it well. Joke cards are mean, disrespectful and right out.

[C-Bart]

Wow. You are moving closer to Saint Dia:-)

Keep up the good work.

[Dia]

<laughing>

Hiya, C-Bart,

I can tell you one thing - 'Saint' Dia wouldn't have been spitting nails like I was when I went to the bank today and discovered that the bank is on the same street OW family lives on. Even worse, what I thought was the driveway to said bank is Exit Only so I had to drive past her house before I could turn around. Grrrrrr! (At least I know which driveway to dump the *&^%$@# toys and bigwheel in now!!)

<Dia rummages in backseat for Molotov Cocktail fixin's>

Dam%, no rag and no matches! Knew I shoulda started smoking.

(kidding!!)

So instead I eyed a man walking into the bank about the same time as I did and had this lovely little fantasy that he was OW father and how I would tell him that it would be best if his daughter ended her affair with DH - because I was his wife and I wasn't giving him up without a fight.

So there's the down-and-dirty side of Dia.

[givingitmyall]

Sounds like you are doing great. Keep it up.

[Dia]

Hmm, I think I just accrued some 'saint' points with H tonight, too.

I cooked a big meal last night, and really didn't feel like it tonight. We have a school potluck tomorrow, so I'll be gearing up for that, too. So tonight, I made a verbal note of the leftovers but then told H that I wanted some fish tacos from the surf shack. H demurred, saying it was his game night and he didn't want to run out on his buddies.

Dia: No, I didn't mean having dinner out. I'm going to go get food and bring it back. What do you want?

H (incredulously): You're offering to bring me a fish taco? (Yes, immediately after the the 'nuts' thing... but I digress. Although, we *did* make a quick reference to Sandra Bernhard.)

Dia: Yup. Is that what you want?

H: Oh, but I couldn't. That wouldn't be fair since I'd be taking the food and hiding in my office gaming.

Dia <grinning>: I know it's your game night: it's cool. And you'll be hiding in your office with or without food, so it might as well be with.

H (tentative, and staring at me in disbelief): Ok, I want a Summerville Special?

Dia: Sure. Be back in a few.

A few mins later, I said it seemed like he felt conflicted about the gaming and was that correct. He answered that yes, he did have some guilt about it, but that it wasn't coming from me. To clarify, he meant he was feeling guilty entirely internally, and not as a reaction to anything I was saying or doing.

That's very good to hear coming from him, because blaming me for his own emotional states, esp. for him feeling bad about something, used to be one of our issues.

So I brought him his burger and onion rings to his computer, then went about my business. H is hanging with his buddies, so he's happy. Kidlet is eating fish and chips and watching H game, so he's happy, and I'm watching the sunset over the water and marvelling that God could have created so MANY shades of purple - so I'm happy, too!

[mindfull]

Dia:

Dumb Q...

So, game night is in H's office at home w/buddies? I'm picturing eight grown men crowded around a screen sharing the Summerville Special! LOL

Whatever it is, I'm sure you rocked it!

[Dia]

<giggle!>

No, it's World of Warcraft with 2 RL-but-geographically-distant friends of ours and one or two virtual aquaintences.

[bluerain]

Ha! I knew it! WOW is a game my H used to while away hours and hours on! I cant hold still for long enough to play one of those games!

[Dia]

Yeah, I've played WoW myself and while I enjoyed it, I'm more of a role-player than a raider or powergamer so I prefer Lord of the Rings Online. I haven't played in many months due to some technical problems but I'm hoping to get back to it soon. Even better, H has offered to play with me so maybe we can get a regular thing going.

Nothing momentous to report - just the usual (atm) comfortable, companionable stuff. We walk the kidlet to school together in the morning, then we chit-chat on the walk back. Then there's half an hour to 45 mins before H leaves for work, and we tend to talk then as well. He gamed late last night, so we didn't talk when he got off the computer like we usually do, but it didn't bother me. I initiated a hug before work. Typical limbo?

There was another piece of conversation this morning that's more future-looking than the alleged 2-3 weeks I'm supposed to be here, but I'm not making a big deal of those. He's also not said word one (directly at least) about me moving out or about him filing for D.

<shrug> So I keep doin' what I'm doin'.

My paycheck has cleared, so I'll be scheduling some more DB sessions soonish. I'm looking forward to that as the last one went so well.

Potluck supper at the school tonight, a PTA social thingie. I'll be making a big ol' salad for H and myself, and then something kid friendly for kidlet.

[Kettricken]

What are you doing in the visual "here kitty kitty" department?