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smile

I'll be quite curious to hear what you glean from your reading.


"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes.
Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
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well, for one thing, it's painfully clear that we're still hugely connected. I knew that, really, but this book confirms it in an unequivocal way.


The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.

My sitch - Divorce Busted!
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
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Quote from book, p. 60,

" ...if you get your identity from your feelings -- then you can afford to have them change. You'll feel like you won't know who you are..."


ooooooh! Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding!

I think this is part of where H is right now.


The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.

My sitch - Divorce Busted!
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
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Hi Dia,

I've seen a lot about this book on other's threads. I told myself I would buy it if H came back. Well, he's not, and we're headed for a D.

I think I'll read it anyway now.


Me 56
H 47
Married 21 years
No children
Bomb & moved out 4/07 "My feelings have changed" & "I want to live by myself".
Ow Bomb 8/07
H filed 6/08
D final 2/05/10




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Dia Offline OP
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Hi, Silver Fox,

It's a good read so far.

And I need to correct my quote above.

That should read that you CAN'T afford to have them change...

Big difference.


The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.

My sitch - Divorce Busted!
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
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Right,

And my H has talked about his "feelings" more than he's talked about anything else in these 2 years.

So I guess MLC=identity from feelings=don't know who you are


Me 56
H 47
Married 21 years
No children
Bomb & moved out 4/07 "My feelings have changed" & "I want to live by myself".
Ow Bomb 8/07
H filed 6/08
D final 2/05/10




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One thing I will say ... don't be surprised if you get to a point where you think, "what sick sadistic b*tch recommended this book with *all this talk about sex* to a separated person???" I apologize in advance for that, but if you soldier through, there is so much wisdom that is just *basic* to any relationship, even if the sex portion of the program is non-field-testable at the moment. Even in the more specifically sex-oriented passages, there is much that can extrapolate usefully, IMHO.


"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes.
Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
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Dia Offline OP
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ROFL - yes, I have already hit a few 'cold shower' passages but frankly, I've been relaxing and enjoying them. My H is an amazing lover, so even though there's no current action, I have a very (*ahem*) large file of memories to enjoy.

Last edited by Dia; 08/18/09 11:34 PM.

The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.

My sitch - Divorce Busted!
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
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Originally Posted By: Dia
Awww, f%$@. I'm on p. 59 of Passionate Marriage, having skipped some of the introductory scene setting, and yeah, this book is about us (me and H).

I'll settle in and do some good, hard reading.

That book is so hard to read! But a really good book.

It didn't help me with W, but I hope it helps in the future!

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Quote:
"what sick sadistic b*tch recommended this book with *all this talk about sex* to a separated person???"

Yeah, I've heard a little about Ch. 10 I believe it is. Maybe that's one reason I've avoided the book so far!

Irony of all ironies, my H is a professor and an intellectual and this is exactly the kind of book he would respond too.

But alas, that H is "gone" now.


Me 56
H 47
Married 21 years
No children
Bomb & moved out 4/07 "My feelings have changed" & "I want to live by myself".
Ow Bomb 8/07
H filed 6/08
D final 2/05/10




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