Remember your moniker. You still do not know how this is going to work out. I remember telline myself that I can last as long as necessary to keep my family together for my childrens sake.
Thanks Burt I think of that every day. My C that I have been seeing told me the last time I saw him to drop the rope. Told me that I have tried everything else and she needs to change. Let her think I am gone for a while and see if she picks it back up. I am going to be there for the kids and be the best me I can be. If she wanted me to be there for her she would make it happen. I have not called her now in over two weeks and have not e-mailed her in a couple of months. I hardly see her anymore but I know she is watching me. A good friend told me that I need to take the control foundation that she has away from her and when I do it will cause her to look within. I hope it is true. RTQ
Me 34 WAW 34 S 3 D 1 Marr. 7 Tog. 8 Bomb 04/11/2009 Left 04/13/2009
Dropping the rope has been hard. I wonder sometimes how long if ever it will take for her to pick it up. I guess that is when I should expect to see some change in her. I am very tired of the lonlieness. I have tried to spend time with family and friends but feel that it is beginning to be too much. I am not going to go out dating or anything like that. For me I am married and regardless of the current situation am still going to be faithful to my wife. Comming here from time to time helps with the quiet times. I just ask myself every day how much longer this will need to go on. Getting harder but still RTQ
Me 34 WAW 34 S 3 D 1 Marr. 7 Tog. 8 Bomb 04/11/2009 Left 04/13/2009
It gets easier with time, you will not be lonely forever, whether it be with her or someone else. Quit feeling sorry for yourself, start looking for the good things in your life. Do you like sports? Join a volleyball league or softball league. Do you have season tickets for a college football team? So many things to do out there.
By the way she may not pick that rope back up, but you need to really look at yourself and what you are doing, life is too short.
I find it honorable that you are not going to date anyone else, but there is nothing wrong with going out there and dancing a little bit or flirting here and there is there? Be mysterious. It will get back to her whether you want it to or not.
I feel like it has gotten easier with time. I hardly think of calling her anymore and haven't in almost 4 weeks and not e-mailed in 2-3 months. I have tried to stay busy with things here and there. It is getting back to her. Or I can tell it is because she will ask about things that I did not tell her. So she is asking someone. I do know that she may not pick up the rope but I hope she does. She was the mysterious one in the beginning but I have taken up that role lately and it is fun. I do find her questioning things more now when we exchange the kids. I try to be as elusive as possible. RTQ
Me 34 WAW 34 S 3 D 1 Marr. 7 Tog. 8 Bomb 04/11/2009 Left 04/13/2009
Having a friend stay with me for the next few days. He is visiting from out of town. When he lived here he used to go out with me and the W from time to time. When I pick up the kids today I was going to take him with me. Going to take him and the kids to the beach. Wonering how the w will react when she sees me with him. I think she will be mad but I don't really care. It is her issued not mine. He is single and invited me to go out to some clubs with him this weekend and I think I will. Sounds like fun. RTQ
Me 34 WAW 34 S 3 D 1 Marr. 7 Tog. 8 Bomb 04/11/2009 Left 04/13/2009
Went to get the kids yesterday and took the friend with me. W was very reserved at first but quickly changed to her old self in an instant. She was talking to both of us asking what we were doing and so on. I was being very elusive with any information. When it came time to leave I cut her off and said we had to go. Had a great time and when dropping the kids off later last night she was very reserved and cold again. I feel like the D is causing a lot of problems, decisions, hard times, etc. for her. I feel like she is trying to make them my problems by being angry or upset with me. For me they are not my issue. Left her and the kids and went to hang out with some friends. She texted me about a 1/2 hour after seeing her saying that our S left one of his toys in my car and was very upset. I did not respond. I feel like this was her reaching. Pulling the rope to see if I was there. A few months ago I would have dropped everything to go take it to him. Not now. She has toys in her car that he was missing too and I did not call her about it. Any ways I do feel like this was her trying to see if I was at the other end of the rope. I wasn't and hope this and my elusiveness will start her looking at herself. Any suggestions? RTQ
Me 34 WAW 34 S 3 D 1 Marr. 7 Tog. 8 Bomb 04/11/2009 Left 04/13/2009
