I was here Still Smoldering. But, now I am moving here because.......I am officially divorced. As of July 30th. Got the paperwork on Saturday. I took a moment to cry. Then I invited my friends over and we drank a nice bottle of Veuve and toasted out of my wedding glasses...to my new life.
It hurt for a couple days...and it will again. They are now planning their wedding...oooh in Vegas, invite by Evite and FB. I wanted to ask if McDonald's was catering it? Sorry, bitter, still (just a tiny bit, though...seriously).
I hope my friends from newcomers find me. I thought it was appropriate to move on over. I've been in newcomers for 2 years. Maybe because I was in denial and it still, to this day, feels new.
I am far better off today than I was just a few months ago and getting stronger each day. Mostly, when I go weeks without having to deal with my Ex.
But, now the gasoline.....he hasn't paid any child support. She's 14 months. He was out of work and got a large bulk unemployment check..almost 10K. I knew about it. He lied and said that he hadn't settled with unemployment. I called him out and told him all I wanted was a payment or two so we could catch up and I could buy her a new car seat. He said he had bills to pay. So, I said, "fine, you leave me no choice. The court says I need to go through support services." He said "go ahead". So, I did. And, finally after 2 months, I got my appointment and my case is open.
Ex got his paperwork, too....yesterday. Haven't heard a peep out of OW or X. I am anticipating the absolute worst behavior from him. The Fit is gonna hit the Shan. He is going to explode. So, I'm just waiting. Have my plan to walk away and put it all on him. He told me to go to CSS. He always complains that I don't listen to him. This time I did.
Stay tuned....hope everyone here will welcome me in their forum.
Last edited by blindsided1; 08/05/0907:35 PM.
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
Glad you are over here....guess I should be too. Heck I should have been here a long time ago!
Glad CSS is getting involved. A friend of mine is doing the same thing. Her exh was just contacted last week too. My exh pays pretty good, I think because he thinks it will help him later with custody.
Let them get pissed. They have no leg to stand on and would only be mad because you are standing up to them.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
If it wasn't this...he'd just find something else to hate me for. So, if he's gonna hate me no matter what, what's stopping me?
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
Today would have been my 4th wedding anniversary. It's hard to believe that I'm divorced one week before our anniversary. It's been a bit of a rough morning. I've been poking at some open wounds. The one that stands out is the idea that he walked out on me when I was 6 weeks pregnant. It was a high risk pregnancy. We could have lost her and he didn't even care. As a matter of fact, he threw his new relationship in my face. It was the most hurtful thing I have ever been through. Then he has the nerve to say to me "make sure you don't lose that baby. It's the only chance you have of me coming home."
I am having a hard time forgiving him, lately.
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
I have to ask, what kind of degenerate says " make sure you don't lose that baby. It's the only chance you have of me coming home."?! That is a sick, sick thing to say.
You don't need ot forgive him. You just need ot move on with your own life.
I think so too. You should be looking forward to living a healthier life. That is such an abusive thing to say. You deserve so much better in your life!!! Karen
When I get upset, I just remind myself of the person he really is. I can't even believe that OW thinks I am jealous of her.
Yes, I am sooooo jealous...I want a man who walked out on his pregnant wife, who lives off of me and has no problem doing so, who has to pay over $1000/month in child support - that I will end up paying for, a man that made me work overtime and double shifts up until 1 week before I delivered our son - just because he wouldn't get a job, a man that cheats on me with his ex wife and many other women and has the whole two years we have been together, a man who has no real relationship with his family, hates his mother, envies his father and is so jealous of his brother he won't even acknowledge when he is in the room. A man who is content with seeing his daughter once or twice a month even though he only lives 15 minutes away, doesn't provide ANYTHING for her or pay her child support, doesn't check on her or wonder about how she is or what she is doing that is new, a man that takes waaaaayyyyy more than he gives and doesn't pull his weight, steals, lies and lies and lies and steals and steals and steals.
Yes, April, I am jealous....that is the kind of man I would do anything, even compromise my childred and myself, to marry. Because, I can't do any better......HA
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
INteresting....this morning ExH was calling. I wouldn't answer. After the 4th time in 3 minutes..I picked up. I have not talked to him in weeks and the last time I did we had a big blow up. So, what's he do? Asks if I want to have sex with him. Hell NO. I tell him "I am not your wife, anymore. You're with someone else, go have sex with her". He says "since when are you not my wife?" What? He knows. His GF knows...she's been gloating about it all over FB. Then he tells me that he got the letter from CSS. That's it. No fight. No anger. No questions. No nothing.
Scaring the crap outta me. He has to be up to something or he just doesn't understand the ramifications of what that letter means. I have no idea. But, OW has been quiet tooo for the last few days....I feel like something is a brewin'. But, I can't imagine what they could possible do. I don't know, but it's scaring me.
M 5yrs 1st baby-girl born 6/18/08 Bomb: 10/13/07 OW - I was 6wks Prego H Moved in w/OW: 11/2/07 D Final 07/10 OW had his baby 3/17/09-so her Me, now - happier than I ever was with him
UGGH!!! The silence is almost worse isn't it? Makes you wonder whats happening. I think you ought to send OW a little card thanking her for taking your exh off your hands and would she please tell him to stop propositioning you for sex!
Have a good weekend.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I think you ought to send OW a little card thanking her for taking your exh off your hands and would she please tell him to stop propositioning you for sex!
That would be so funny!!! I think OW probably feels like she's the big winner of the big shiny golden prize or something, and then at some point she's going to realize that she's really "won" a big bag of poo. Sorry, but you have NOTHING to be jealous of the OW!!! Karen
Karen