My audible chuckle at reading that roused the sleeping WAW -- which isn't necessarily a good thing, as I've noticed that the WAS causes the least amount of psychic damage when laying completely dormant...
Ha Ha that is so funny.
No supreme court injunctions are serious serious big big big fine possible jail time action.Probably same as yours.
Perfectly lovely lunch today after several successful meetings (which sort of seems like a contradiction in terms!). There seems to be a growing consensus among observers that WAW is deeply in MLC. Which I've always suspected was at least partially the case. She continues to represent to gf's that she wishes she could have a "distraction" (meaning OM) and to me that she has no interest in OM. She's either fronting with her gf's, trying to save face in some sense, or she's telling me what she thinks I want to hear (but that's because she doesn't know about the Spiers Doctrine). Of course it's also possible that BOTH are true -she's not interested in OM but wishes she was.
None of that matters now, however; OM or no OM, I'll deal with that later. Right now the 25-meter target is the one I need to focus on, because that's the one who could kill me.
For clarification what/who is your 25 meter target?
1. Is it keeping up the friendiness? Keeping the positive thing going?
(excuse my lack of sleep if this painfully obvious)
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
Thanks for that. It'll be interesting to see what WAW's mood is like tomorrow morning, having spent the entire day today with them.
And if one more person tells me " oh they'll be fine" I'll throttle them. Three adult children of divorce laid that on me this week, but their experiences are 20 or 30 years in the past, so I find their glib assurances highly suspect. And, when pressed, the woman I lunched with today admitted she hasn't had a successful long-term relationship as an adult because "if you can't trust your parents, who can you trust?" and now she can't trust men - and inevitably picks the ones who leave.
And if one more person tells me " oh they'll be fine" I'll throttle them. Three adult children of divorce laid that on me this week, but their experiences are 20 or 30 years in the past, so I find their glib assurances highly suspect. And, when pressed, the woman I lunched with today admitted she hasn't had a successful long-term relationship as an adult because "if you can't trust your parents, who can you trust?" and now she can't trust men - and inevitably picks the ones who leave.
So f**k that.
That has irked me so much. Better to be real about what it is so it can be dealt with. Anyone who says that sh*t to me immediately loses credibility...
AND, many people go through gnarly sh*t as children...I guess we have to, as parents, guide and love them through it. I struggle to not see my kids as "damaged"...I want to accept them fully and know that this is part of their path.
But, it does them no good to put on a happy face and be glib IMO. Just like my father dying, I've told my kids, "It was hard, but I got through it."
Do not underestimate how lucky they are to have you, so strong, so loving and so present for them. TCB.
My dad told my brothers and I about their divorce when we were in our 20's and my little bro was in high school. It ripped us the biggest hole in our hearts.
I've spoken to lots of folks whose parents are divorced or divorced later in life. And they were still extremely bothered and upset by it. For those to say they'll be fine. I give them the finger. They don't know or they chose to ignore it all together. Kids are resilient. BUT it still hurts to seem them in pain.
I love my step mom but still wish that my mom and dad could be up here with their grand kids like "normal" grandparents do. But I know that is not going to happen. Just a few years ago, my dad had the marriage annulled and even then it cut like a hot knife through butter.
So yes, the bomb will go as planned, but it's still a big blow to the kids. The look on my kids faces was undescribable and still hurts till this day. If I could turn back time...
My prayers are with you, Mrs. SP and those kids.
Me - 39 W - 39 D - 11 D - 8 S - 5 Served - 04/14/09 Temporary Court Orders - 04/27/09
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.
I think these "they'll be fine" folks equate survive with "thrive," and I find that to be problematic in the extreme. Even folks who "survived" can't know that they've thrived because they don't know what their lives would have been like otherwise.
They might well be living their "best lives" (to use a bit of Oprah-ese), but it's their best life given the fact of divorce, which is a different thing altogether.
D8 has already told me she won't get married. I asked her why and she said because my parents are D'd, one of my brothers is D'd and me and W are heading that direction. She said why bother getting married. She sounded as if it was in her blood to get D'd.
I was bothered by it. I doubt W knows what she said.
