Could use some insight...long...

[Startingover2]

Your kids are probably busy and entertained with inlaws in town. I wouldn't take it personally. K graduation...I remember that well. So cute.

Let me give you another side to your thoughts and I may be out in left field here. My first exh (my older kids dad) and I had a very friendly divorce. In fact, now we say it was a huge mistake and we were just dumb and immature. Anyway, we have always gotten along well. We talk about stuff, our kids and he even helped me through my D with exh. Its always been comfortable and easy to get along with him. I would rather have it that way then the anxiety I feel with this exh. My point? Don't read too much into her friendliness. It may be something triggering thoughts or it just may be comfortable to her and in her mind she may be slipping into the routine. Not trying to be a downer here, but just don't overanalyze...from the queen of analyzing

[volleydog]

Your kids are probably busy and entertained with inlaws in town. I wouldn't take it personally.

I don't at all I really do like my inlaws.

Don't read too much into her friendliness. It may be something triggering thoughts or it just may be comfortable to her and in her mind she may be slipping into the routine. Not trying to be a downer here, but just don't overanalyze...from the queen of analyzing

I'm trying not to, but it's just hard. Ever since that dang dinner last week I've been on the roller coaster by myself thinking and rethinking everything. I just need to get control of myself again.

[kassie]

I hate to add to your confusion, but I interpret things with your W as positive moves. Partly understand the "comfort" level idea that SO2 talks about - I have a similiar R with my exh too as she does - but we both moved on.

Anyway, I guess the point being that there are many ways to see a sitch or event. Re-read my post about the possible reasons for your feeling "bombed" more than once and then think about goals.
Start with the ones you had in the beginning, ones that you added since then or changed, and then what still remains true to you and your idea of M.

Doing analytical puzzles helps to shift the brain from moods to rational thoughts and behavior. That is one reason setting goals may help. Crosswords, sudukos etc also work.

Let me know if I can help.

[Startingover2]

Checking in on you Volleydog. I like Kassie's suggestions about moving your mind elsewhere if you can.

[Coach]

I like Kassie's suggestions about moving your mind elsewhere if you can.

Easiest way to get someone with the hiccups to stop is to ask them, "what was the first thing you did when when you got up this morning?" Make them be specific. Works like a charm.
You lead your mind by challenging it.

[volleydog]

That is a great idea Kassie...Much better today...

Had a long talk with my boss about the events of the last week and one thing I think I left out here was the big fight we had last Monday night. Fight was totally my fault it was really stupid and I felt like crap all day last Tuesday. I call her on my way out from work to tell her how sorry I was, probably the best apology I've EVER given her...It was the next day with the invite to dinner the change in her "way" around me...

Anyhow for about the last month my GAL has been for crap because of work, been working till 11pm or later almost every night. Boss tells me to get out at 5pm or I'm fired...So went to a poker game I hadn't been to in a month and it was great. One of the best things and it sounds stupid but when people you don't really know ask you if everything's ok since you haven't been around in awhile.

I'm really looking forward D's graduation and play tonight that'll be fun.

[kassie]

S0, her change may be related to hearing something from you that shows her your change.

This is what is working on me with my H - he is taking responsibility like never before minus the pity party. He is saying things which show me a change in his thinking pattern. Perhaps this is true for you.

[volleydog]

So the graduation tonight...Was great...I'm sure all the parents on here think their kids are cute, and I'm sure they are but my D has to be the cutest little girl in the world :). She started doing this thing with pictures, posing like she in some beauty pageant started TODAY. Just cracked me up asked W about it and she was just as surprised. All the kids looked so cute in the cap and gowns.

Meet a couple, that I have known since I was 10, today and apparently our D's have been going to the same preschool for 3 years and we just never ran into each other. They knew who my girl is since I have a very unique last name.

W and I as usual got along great MIL was there got along great with her. Only part that hurt and only for about ten minutes. W got a babysitter/nanny for the summer and I hadn't met her, she is the D of the owner of the daycare. W asked if I wanted to meet her she'd introduce me, sure I thought...W said "this is D and S father...OUCH...Then I thought how else would she introduce me the girl obviously knows I don't live there so that was the "bad" part...

Just really fun seeing D up there singing and getting her diploma, dang she's cute...

This is my song for when she starts dating (at 25+)...

The Declaration of Independence
Think I could tell you that first sentence
But then I’m lost

I can't begin to count the theories
I've had pounded in my head
That I forgot

I don't remember all that Spanish
Or the Gettysburg address
But there is one speech from high school
I'll never forget

(Chorus)
Come on in boy sit on down
And tell me about yourself
So you like my daughter do you now?
Yeah we think she's something else
She's her daddy's girl
Her momma's world
She deserves respect
That’s what she'll get
Ain’t it son?
Hey y'all run along and have some fun
I'll see you when you get back
Bet I’ll be up all night
Still cleanin' this gun

Well now that I’m a father
I’m scared to death one day my daughter
Is gonna find
That teenage boy I used to be
That seems to have just one thing on his mind

She’s growin' up so fast
It won't be long before
I’ll have to put the fear of god into
Some kid at the door

(Chorus)
Come on in boy sit on down
And tell me about yourself
So you like my daughter do you now?
Yeah we think she's something else
She's her daddy's girl
Her momma's world
She deserves respect
That’s what she'll get
Now ain't it son?
Y’all go out and have some fun
I'll see you when you get back
Probably be up all night
Still cleanin' this gun

Now it's all for show
Ain’t nobody gonna get hurt
It’s just a daddy thing
And hey, believe me, man it works

(Chorus)
Come on in boy sit on down
And tell me about yourself
So you like my daughter do you now?
Yeah we think she's something else
She's her daddy's girl
Her momma's world
She deserves respect
That’s what she'll get
Now ain't it son?
Y’all run along and have a little fun
I'll see you when you get back
Probably be up all night
Still cleanin' this gun

Son, now y'all buckle up and have her back by te- let's say about nine...thirty.
Drive safe.

[xalelle]

W asked if I wanted to meet her she'd introduce me, sure I thought...W said "this is D and S father...OUCH...Then I thought how else would she introduce me the girl obviously knows I don't live there so that was the "bad" part...

Hey Volleydog,

Yes, these things really hurt, but dont let them.. let them roll right off. I can tell you that my W once introduced me as her "Soon To Be Ex Husband" (those exact words). We are now very happily married and discussing renewing vows and lots of big family plans, both very happy and very close.

Hang in there

[volleydog]

X thank for the post Im actually good, happy. That's just the first time for that.

One other thing they did a slide show with all the kids pics one section was with family members. Watching this I was wondering what pics w picked...no idea what the criteria was...it was a pic of the four of us from Christmas...not reading ANYTHING into that it was just nice of W.