It's funny you post that because it's what I've been thinking about most of the day.
One of the first times we did MC she said something(I don't remember what it was) but I remember saying I don't know how you want me to act...WOW...How YOU want ME to act...
It took me MONTHS and MONTHS to decide I don't care (not in a bad way0 how she wants me to act, I'm not going to act, I'm going to be ME. Since that day I have, I've been me. Most of the time it's been a happy fun person but just like anyone else I have my days were I'm pi$$ed off or something. I'm NOT going to act in front of her, I'm not going to take it out on her either but she needs to know THIS IS ME take it or leave it.
So tonight tball game went as I expected she was a little/lot less interactive than last night. One thing she did that I don't like but she has no idea, she wore the three stone diamond ring I got her for our 10yr anniversary. She doesn't wear it very often at all, at least around me and I really don't like to see it on her.
I probably wasn't the funniest person tonight either since I got a call from my boss that one of the owners of our company wants to have a conf call tonight at 10pm...Got the call at tball so the W knows that's why my mood went from happy to a little po'd. Like I said though I'm not going to hide things like that because IF we do get back together I want her to know I have more emotions and feelings other than happy...and one thing I don't do is act depressed or defeated in front of her because I'm NOT.
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
You and Kass are sort of in the same boat. I believe your wife may have interest in R, but needs some time or convincing. Just keep being you. If something changes either way, you will know.
Blindsided and I....well we are dealing with really screwed up men! Just trying to protect our little girls without getting sucked back in emotionally.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I realized a while ago that I have to be me because IF we get back together it has to be because she wants me not someone I project around her.
You and blindsided...WOW...I really feel for both of you because I really can't understand "men" that can do that. But you just keep looking after that little girl...since I'm on to posting song lyrics and finally get my focus back on God if you get a chance listen to this song...
Destined to Win by Degarmo & Key...
This songs to all the people With light in their hearts And love in their eyes. You don't have to worry When the mountains seem of infinite size.
There is one who goes before you to calm the sea. There's a king who leads his people to victory.
We are Destined to Win We're surrounded by his Love And guarded by his power. Destined to Win Following the Lord until the battles over. We are Destined to Win
We all get discouraged When the pressures of life start weighing us down We've learned that in his footsteps Crosses in life must preceed the crowns.
There is one who goes before you To calm the sea. There's a king who leads his people to victory.
We are Destined to Win We're surrounded by his Love And guarded by his power. Destined to Win Following the Lord until the battles over. We are Destined to Win
We've got to remember It's our destiny to win the end With Christ on our side We are Destined to Win.
We are Destined to Win We're surrounded by his Love And guarded by his power. Destined to Win Following the Lord until the battles over. Destined to Win
We're surrounded by his Love And guarded by his power. Destined to Win Following the Lord until the battles over.
We are Destined We are Destined We are Destined to Win
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
One last comment tonight, it was you that fell in love with your W and the person who won her heart the first time. If it happened once it can happen again.
Just want to vent and have a tiny pity party for myself then let it go...MIL is coming down next week for a week, that is never a good thing as far as our R goes...Love my MIL but she doesn't help things. I'm pretty sure she's coming down to help W box up stuff for me, no real other reason for her to come down for a week.
Anyway vent/pity party over, back to my PMA...:)
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
Just want to vent and have a tiny pity party for myself then let it go...MIL is coming down next week for a week, that is never a good thing as far as our R goes...Love my MIL but she doesn't help things. I'm pretty sure she's coming down to help W box up stuff for me, no real other reason for her to come down for a week.
Why are they going to box up stuff for you? You do it. That's mothering behavior and you want to put a end to that. Set a boundary, it will help you feel better.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
I'm not positive they are...but it sort of makes sense. I don't want to ask in case I'm wrong, I think that would look weak and scared. I feel neither of those things.
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
No, don't ask...and don't assume. I say that with a smile because I am the queen of assuming. You never know. Just stay the course.
Is your MIL in favor of your M or wanting her daughter to get a D?
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Is your MIL in favor of your M or wanting her daughter to get a D?
Great question and I don't know the answer. If I had to guess she would prefer for us to stay M but wants W to be happy and will support her either way...The good thing is I still get along really well with MIL and FIL.
I really just wish I could get the dinner from Wed night out of my mind but it's still there. I'm a very analytical type person and try to find the answers to EVERYTHING and it bothers me not to have answers...For the vast majority of my life I've been a black and white type thinker, which I'm slowly changing but it's still there sometimes.
Last edited by volleydog; 05/22/0902:36 PM.
Me:40 W: 39 T: 17 years M: 15 years S-9 D-6 D final 11/10/2009
"We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems."
For the vast majority of my life I've been a black and white type thinker, which I'm slowly changing but it's still there sometimes.
Black and white is great for math, engineering, medicine and accounting. Relationships revolve around emotions that are carnation red, pansy purple, ocean blue, sun yellow, baby skin pink, pine needle green, tangerine orange, pure white, and dense black. So your thinking has to include all of your senses, heart and soul.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
