Tougher Than the Rest

[Puppy Dog Tails]

"The likelihood has to offset the likely pain of even further rejection, as my wound is still open (or at least not fully healed) from her affair."

This suggests that you are still being withholding, perhaps. Note that I said IF...

In any case, rather than looking for what is wrong in what I write, why not look for what is right with as much effort?

Point taken, OT, and I'm sorry if I'm doing that. I guess I'm just feeling cynical today. You (and DQ, and Hoozh and the others) really have opened up my thinking a lot from what it used to be, even if it doesn't seem like it.

Puppy

[oldtimer]

Here's a bit of work for you: What do you get by holding on so tightly of the view you have of W?


And, if everything else blurs before your eyes, keep this in mind from DQ: "Your wife is ooozing it, too...she's just immature and has NO EXPERIENCE (how could she?) with practicing and playing with her sexual nature. But if you won't start being open to the idea that she even feels this way, how can SHE be open to it at all?"

"Your wife is ooozing it, too...she's just immature and has NO EXPERIENCE (how could she?) with practicing and playing with her sexual nature. But if you won't start being open to the idea that she even feels this way, how can SHE be open to it at all?"

"Your wife is ooozing it, too...she's just immature and has NO EXPERIENCE (how could she?) with practicing and playing with her sexual nature. But if you won't start being open to the idea that she even feels this way, how can SHE be open to it at all?"


I will tell you a related story later.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

OK.

Please do keep in mind that I vent worst-case stuff on here. I really did do a lot of naughty, outta-the-box talk with wife weekend before last, and really am trying to keep an open mind with her.

What do I get by holding on? It's a great question. I guess what I get is some sense of "This won't be my fault if this doesn't work out," combined with "At least my heart won't hurt THAT much again," if I don't FULLY open back up to her again??

[hoosiermama]

But here's the thing. At some point, and this is admittedly much easier said than done--you have to decide if you want to be right, or if you want to be happy. Being right will only provide temporary satisfaction.

[Sugar and Spice]

It's once we get outside of the bedroom that she has a hard time keeping this funspirited play going. Saturday, when we went bikini shopping, we drove past a local dog track/poker room. I suggested that it would be fun to go there sometime. She said she didn't really enjoy playing poker, so then I suggestively said "well you can just dress up, and hang on my arm, and be eye candy." She laughed at first, and sorta seemed to like it, and even added "You mean I could dress in a short sexy skirt and all that?" and I said "Mmmm, yeah," and then she thought a minute and said "well, I don't really play poker," very serious -- sort of a "final say" on the matter.

JMHO...but maybe Mrs. Puppy is having a hard time allowing herself to be someone else with you. She has locked herself into one role and is having a hard time letting it go. She wants to, but maybe shes afraid of what letting you see "that" side of her will do to your relationship. Not realizing that letting you in will only deepen the relationship. Exploring your sexuality with someone also lays your innermost feelings, desires, etc...bare to someone else and I think she fears that most of all. Someone who knows her secret desires and loves her anyway, warts an all.

[hoosiermama]

Or maybe this is just too public a thing to do. Might be an interesting role-play, tho.

[hoosiermama]

Not trying to be a smart a**--just that it might be worth letting go of that "not my fault" thing, 'cuz it won't serve you in the long run. Recognizing it is more than half the battle, tho!

[oldtimer]

And the naughty stuff worked, right???

[oldtimer]

From S&S
"JMHO...but maybe Mrs. Puppy is having a hard time allowing herself to be someone else with you. She has locked herself into one role and is having a hard time letting it go. She wants to, but maybe shes afraid of what letting you see "that" side of her will do to your relationship. Not realizing that letting you in will only deepen the relationship. Exploring your sexuality with someone also lays your innermost feelings, desires, etc...bare to someone else and I think she fears that most of all."

This is what I'm trying to say, in a much more concise and tactful manner. :-)

[Sugar and Spice]

Puppy have you gone out and bought her anything to enhance your "role-playing?"