o Carrie came to get Ross tonight, everything seemed as normal until ross went in to get his school work.
C- Where's tawny? Me- At Molly's house. C- How is she doing? Me- Not great right now. C- Is she ok? (her eyes starting to tear, looking down) Me- She is struggling, I was going to talk with you after I meet with pupil services tomorrow. C- I would like that. (staring directly at me, tears now coming) Me- I will call you this weekend and we can talk about it. C- Thank you....
It was strange y'all. No, I am not making a big deal about it, it was just odd and for a brief moment, I saw the woman I knew and loved. It was heart wrenching.
She then asked me why I was dressed so nice...wierd...... I told her I had interviewed this afternoon. I also mentioned that I may need her to watch Ross at some point if I need to go out of town to interview as two companies I am interviewing with are based in different cities.
She then asked me " Are you looking at jobs outside of Memphis?"
I told her no, that I didn't think that was an option and it had never crossed my mind.
Strange questions, strange conversation, and I don't really know what to think about it.......
Ian
why think anything??
sounds to me it was status quo for a WAW..
I would not put very much into it...you know actions speak louder than words..
Sending good luck and best wishes your way with little telekinetic twinges encouraging the potential employer to call you.
It's hard when the spouse seems vulnerable. It's amazing how I respond. Then I remember.. I am an unpopped bag of popcorn and he's no longer my microwave.
Yeah, don't think anything. Don't try to read anything into what you are saw or heard. Perhaps it was just regret for how she has dropped the ball so badly with her D?
Yeah, don't think anything. Don't try to read anything into what you are saw or heard. Perhaps it was just regret for how she has dropped the ball so badly with her D?
also..I would like to know if Carrie knows that you broke up with your Girlfriend?? and what is carries status with OM??
Yeah, don't think anything. Don't try to read anything into what you are saw or heard. Perhaps it was just regret for how she has dropped the ball so badly with her D?
also..I would like to know if Carrie knows that you broke up with your Girlfriend?? and what is carries status with OM??
No Idea Mike....
My thoughts are not about us, just to be clear. My thoughts are about the amazing mother she used to be.
Remember y'all, Carrie hasn't communicated with Tawny since August 08 except for maybe 2 or 3 texts and 1 phone call that was a disaster.
I want my daughter to have a mom. I want her to have a female adult in her life. I want her to have the mom that I believed she would always have when I married this woman.
I could give a rats asss about whether Carrie has any thoughts about me, that boat has sailed. What I want is to see her get her act together. Get healthy and make better choices. I want to see her work for a relationship with Tawny.
My daughter deserves to be pursued by her mother. She deserves to know that no matter what is going on between them that ehr mother loves and adores her.
Do you have any idea how fricken hard it is every single night knowing that right now I am all Tawny has. Do you know how many times I sit and cry because I am fully aware that I cannot be everything my daughter needs.
The flash that I saw yesterday was not about me, what I saw was a mother who's eyes welled up with tears because inside she does love our daughter. I saw the first sign of emotion, real emotion, from this woman in regards to our child.
My heart hurt because I sat there wanting so bad to shake her and tell her to just reach out to her child. Tell Tawny that she loves her unconditionally and that Tawny is her priority in life. Tell our daughter she is sorry for what she did to her. For God's sakes Tawny deserves to know that she is loved by her own mother.
Every day that goes by where Carrie does not step up to the plate is another day that she loses with an amazing young lady. Every day is another day that my daughter does not have an amazing mother (because yes she is capable) in her life.
I'm rambling, but it has been on my mind all day and I am just sad and sick about it.
Maybe it is time to be a little brass tacks with Carrie in regards to Tawny. As a mother, I could not imagine turning my back on my child--and D17 has definitely put me through the wringer in the past year. I would tell email her exactly what you just posted. Look, you do not want to reconcile, why candy coat things with her anymore?
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
This is just my $.02. And it's based on my history, so take it for what it's worth.
My mother divorced my father when my sister was 16. Things were rough between them after that. Did my sister deserve a mother? yes. Did she have one? No. Was my mother a bad person? Well, that one is hard to answer. My mother certainly feels guilt now, though the guilt is buried beneath layers of hurt formed from poor communication between the two. I also have layers of hurt but that's a different story. Point is, they never figured it out.
Tawny doesn't have an adult woman in her immediate life right now and that's just the way it is. She may identify someone as a mentor in her social life, she may figure something out with Carrie, or you may meet someone new that she bonds with. But it is going to be her responding at the pace of her own needs. The only thing you can do is be the best father you can possibly be. Which you're doing.
I know it's frustrating, but you don't have control over the relationship between tawny and carrie. They have to work it out and you have to take a supporting role. And be damn good at it. IMO.
So, Carrie showed up this morning with a Valentines present for Tawny. She had Ross bring it in the house.
The card she got T-bear was one of those speaking cards. On the front it said "What would Valentines day be without Family?"
When you open the card it is Napoleon Dynamite and he says "The worst day of my life what do you think". There was a short note for Tawny saying she thinks about her every day and hopes this doesn't last long.
I am in tears. You and I both know what a huge step this is for Carrie to reach out to Tawny and I hope that Tawny receives it the way it was intended. I see Carrie trying, a huge way beyond what she was doing just a few short months ago. I will pray that the two of them can rebuild the fragile mother/daughter relationship that they BOTH need in their lives.
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
