Climbing out of the swamp

[frank_D]

Although I do have one question for you its been bugging the crap out of me.

How can you scold your daughter for not doing her school work when you aren't doing so hot with your client's work?

That would be like me scolding my boys for a dirty room when I have clothes all over mine.

You don't flunk your class and have to repeat 8th grade if you don't clean your room.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

True but the bank forecloses the house if you fail your clients.

Our children, as much as they might not like it, are reflections of what we teach them and show them...sadly they learn much of their failings through following our own.

A true leader leads.
A bad leader directs.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

By the way...nice (almost) redirect by choosing the clothes on the floor as the example. Almost a good deflection of the message.

[frank_D]

By the way...nice (almost) redirect by choosing the clothes on the floor as the example. Almost a good deflection of the message.

I thought it would work.....

[2ndChance]

Yes, I do want to be happy. I have been such a freaking Wuss.

I think my counselor would say it's a form of Codependence. We talked about that last meeting.

I'm committed to breaking it. I started yesterday.

That's great Frank. By acknowledging your issue, you've apparently taken the first step. Now what? What's your plan? What are you going to do that's different from what you've been doing?

I remember when my M was in crisis, and I was served with those divorce documents. I realized that it was "now or never". It was not about me understanding or determining when I developed my self-sabotaging issues. I understood that I needed to change my ways, and I knew I needed to change them immediately! But. you can't just snap your finger and expect everything to change, now can you? In my case, I made a list, in my Palm Pilot, of all these things I needed to do, in order to turn my sitch around to (GAL, Stop the Pressuring, Act Happy, Stop being a Wuss, etc.). And I use to look at this list constantly, and especially before any anticipated interaction. I use to repeat it to myself as if it was a mantra, until it started to finally sink in.......

Maybe you can compile a list? Maybe you can share it with us?

Peace.

[frank_D]

Focus on my work
Go for walks
BE happy. Fake it till I make it.
Do one 'social' thing per day
accept what is, no analysis by paralysis
Live in today, instead of fear for tomorrow
Spend some time with each of my daughters every day.

[Nutty Chick]

Although I do have one question for you its been bugging the crap out of me.

How can you scold your daughter for not doing her school work when you aren't doing so hot with your client's work?

That would be like me scolding my boys for a dirty room when I have clothes all over mine.

Ring.
Ring.
Ring.

Hello? Hold on a second.

It's the pot Frank...you're black.

I have a similar question .. how can you moniter your w movements and moods and have no idea that your daughter hasn't done her HW??

IMHO you are watching the wrong person.

Nutty x

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Focus on my work
Go for walks
BE happy. Fake it till I make it.
Do one 'social' thing per day
accept what is, no analysis by paralysis
Live in today, instead of fear for tomorrow
Spend some time with each of my daughters every day.

Your list, just a reminder.

[frank_D]

Just got back from buying D18 a new car. She paid $1,000 and I paid the rest ($3,000). She's pretty happy with it.

Still working hard on catching up projects.

[AmyC]

She paid $1,000 and I paid the rest ($3,000).

Well if all your other bills are caught up, I reckon that makes sense.