Lola, I am just saying because you were going into stage two which is friendship. I know it is exhausting but you don't want to undo any good work you have been doing these past months.
It wasn't my choice. Trust me. We were there, and it was him that backed off. I don't know what happened. I just know that my heart can't take it anymore. I don't want a divorce, and I do want my H. It's just that he seems to be deadset on this divorce.
The best thing I can do for the both of us right now is take a break. I cannot trust myself not to break down, and either yell or cry. I need to get myself together, and then concentrate on this. I am not saying I am writing him off, just taking a break from the drama for a while. He needs to miss me. I am always there, I am always doing for him. Yes, he has done a lot for me in the last month, but to end the trauma of that month with I want a divorce was just a little more than I could handle.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I understand you needing to take a step back Lola. Do it for you and gain your strength back. I'm sorry he brought up the dreaded D word again. I guess if he really wants it, he is going to have to do the work for it.
Don't do what I did though. My STBX filed and then dropped everything but didn't withdraw it from the court. I had a L on retainer and continued it on my side to try to gain some stability financially and in visitation for our son and look where we are now.
(((((Lola)))))
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
It would be really easy for me to file with my legal background, but I have decided that I am going to wait 30 days (from last Friday) before I decide anything, period. There are times when I want to file and just get it over with, and times when I say no its not time. I want to be absolutely sure before I do anything, and right now, I am not. I don't really feel the necessity to get divorced, I am not dating, not planning on it, but if I wanted to, I could do that too, so it really doesn't matter. I just want to get my feet under me first.
But I still miss him every day.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Missing him every day is all the more reason NOT to file. You love him. 30 days isn't going to change that. Only he could change that really. He would have to do something pretty haineous(sp?) to change that I think.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
It would. I do love him. I have just hit the limit of what I can handle now. Honestly, I am actually in a good place. I am content with my life. Things are going well, and I think I just want to focus on that right now. I want to be financially stable, I want to be able to make sure I can do all the things I need to do. And if somewhere along the line we reconnect, great. If not, I will cry, but I will be okay.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
So the first dark week went by, and my tooth broke. Seriously. Since the health insurance is through the DAM's job, I had to text him to ask if we had dental.
I can't wait until I have my own insurance.
I hate this. I miss him, and alternate between loving and hating him at the same time. The acceptance of all of this is the hardest part.
But I still ain't filing.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
No it just happened last night. I am trying to be good and floss every day, and for that I get part of my tooth breaking when I was flossing!!! It isn't noticeable, but I want to get it fixed before it causes more damage.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
