Twitched my nose all day - the only time the work left my desk is when I opened the back door and the wind blew it off my desk!
I dropped out of sight for a little while after my D and my friends understood. Your friends will be there for you when you are ready to shoot off an email to them.
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Has family come into play in your sitch? how connected are you to that background? I have a hard time imagining what it would be like, at least in comparison to how my classmates speak.
My parents came here over 40 years ago - initially to study and ended up staying. I was born here and for the most part raised here. I speak Bengali fluently and was raised on Indian food. We use to call Western dinners - special dinners when I was growing up.
My parents are divorced.
My father grew up in a very rural part of Bangladesh (when it was India) - but is very open minded. He is open to arranging our marriages if that is what we want. And he had no problems with The X being German. He was here for me after bomb #4 and helped me get to the point where I was ready to push the D through. He literally carried me at one time where he cooked for me and listened to me go on and on... He actually said after my D that he was okay with me living together with someone w/o getting married and is very supportive of with me adopting as a single parent. He use to spend 6 months here and 6 months in India every year. He bought a place outside of Kolkatta a couple of years ago - but is getting restless! LOL! I am planning on flying him in to Cambodia and meeting him there for our Angkor Wat vacation.
My mother's side of the family - I have uncles that immigrated to Sweden, Germany and here - also roughly 40 something years ago. I have aunts that are of Swedish, German and Dutch nationalities. The X use to be best friends with one of my German cousins - that is how we met when I was in Germany during spring break. She is also open minded in the sense she didn't care that The X was German or that I am D. She is also okay with me adopting as a single parent.
We eat everything - including beef.
Most of my parent's friends are the same way. I think some of the Indians that immigrated here around when my parents did are more open minded - or perhaps they are friends with my parents b/c they are open minded.
The X worked with a lot of Indians. I was always a little surprised at how conservative they were. In some cases - I think it depends on what part of India you are from - some regions are more conservative than others. Some people are more religious than others.
I am afraid I probably haven't given you much insight into your Indian friends... There is a movie Namesake that has a story line that probably parallels more of what my upbringing was like = those of us that were born/raised here are well are both here and there and at the same time neither here nor there when it comes to heritage. We get to make it up as we go along.
I know Soup - back to basics... It always is - isn't it... Thanks for reminding me.
Hey N_Hill:
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Thats why God made apples, microwaves, and made it difficult to burn water.
Hee hee... Apples and microwaves are essential surviving the big D tools! I haven't burned water - I have burned a pan while boiling water...
I am not really a junk food person but that first year post D - I lived on Domino's pizza, Chinese take out and Dunkin' Donuts! Thank goodness for that post-D metabolism where you gain no weight - I lost weight on that diet.
Sadly - metabolism is back to normal - ice-cream is my comfort food and I pay when I indulge!
Work is work... Procrastination is the bain of my existence...
So far - plans for the weekend include my cooking class on Sunday - this week's topic cocktail mixology!
I would like to garden a little this weekend. Need to trim shrubbies and clean up my main bed - maybe plant a few perenials - things go on sale now! I may plant a tree or two - but small ones - no humongo rootballs this year. I also want to spend some time at Borders planning my vacation.
A silly story... I drove past Young TJ Man several weeks ago in my new car. And then I bumped into him a week or two ago and he ignored me. Now I am not interested in him - he is just too young for me. But I thought - cool - I can tell my C he was wrong. I should have disclosed to YTJM that what appeared to be his crush on me was based on misinformation. YTJM thought I was in my early 30's and that I worked for minimum wage at TJ's and I use to drive a '88 Honda Civic. Well...turns out he didn't recognize me with my short hair! LOL!
I reaized that when two other people looked at me blankly when I talked to them! The Captain at TJ's - he happen to be in on Sunday and b/c I worked there at one time - we always chat. I walked up to him and he did that polite conversation with a stranger tone. I was a little confused - but thought maybe he was busy - or had perhaps forgotten me...
And then the waiter - the one I set a boundary with at the Chinese restaurant walked up to me after I was seated and asked "will it be one today?" I try to get out for lunch everyday - and usually go somewhere and it is usually alone - I was surprised that he asked. And then I looked at him - he didn't recognize me! LOL!
Normally I wore my hair twisted up - well now it is too short to wear up. I didn't think I looked all that different - but apparently I do! And apparently my haircut has taken a few more years off my appearance! I may have to tatoo 1965 on my forehead so people know how old I really am. The secret to looking young - not Botox - it is short hair.
I am afraid I probably haven't given you much insight into your Indian friends... There is a movie Namesake that has a story line that probably parallels more of what my upbringing was like = those of us that were born/raised here are well are both here and there and at the same time neither here nor there when it comes to heritage. We get to make it up as we go along.
Oh, I wasn't looking for insight. Just curious. Nosy, I guess.
It has been very interesting speaking with my co-worker and classmates. I guess what struck me most was how much change they've witnessed in their lifetimes - a lot has happened in India since the 60s. As Americans, I don't think we're able to understand how those big, societal changes affect families, children, marriages. I'll check out the movie.
I guess what struck me most was how much change they've witnessed in their lifetimes - a lot has happened in India since the 60s.
My parents were born in British India - so when I hear their stories - the changes are unbelievable.
And more recently outsourcing has recently changed India on so many levels. That being said - many of the conditions in rural India remain unchanged - i.e. caste system, women's issues, etc.
I have not been back since 2002. I am probably going to try and combine the Cambodia trip with a trip to India to my cousin's wedding. The wedding is in a small city at the foothills of the mountains (near Darjeeling). Too cold to go up into the mountains in January. But it will be a very traditional 3 day wedding - actually all the fun lasts 6 days if you include pre-wedding festivities!
Now I am off to prepare invoices. I have been procrastinating by posting all evening!
I have a deadline - so no more procrastination by posting today... There was a ton of work on my desk w/o pressing deadlines - it was fun not working for awhile!
I did forget to pick up the envelope with the documents that show I won that membership at the gym. They should be arriving in the mail today or tomorrow - so I will join when it arrives.
GAL: This weekend will be cooking class and gardening and planning trip to Cambodia.
There is a black tie event for the humane society in a week or two - but I don't know who is going and well unless I have friends going I don't really feel like going to it alone. Maybe next year I will have a date.
Now they also have wine tasting events to raise money - I have jotted those down in my calendar.
There is a Illinois patent law association dinner coming up in two weeks. I am going to see if my friends are going. People bring spouses - but I don't mind going to that one stag.
I did think about going last year - but wasn't ready yet. There is a part of me that is a little angry at times that I had to go out on my own to be successful. But lately, my focus has shifted to those friends that have helped me get where I am - instead of the old boys network. And recently it feels like my age group is slowly moving into positions of leadership. The world is changing. I need to let what was go and embrace what is. And in this case what is - is good.
I am lucky. Kitty Kat usually wakes me up very early to early in the morning by meowing at the door. He was a feral kitty so is a little afraid of hanging out in the open during the daytime. He is my little vampire kitty. Well the night before last, I was half asleep and missed the last step on my staircase AGAIN and ended up on my rear. Doesn't feel like anything is broken or twisted this time! Nothing is swollen or really hurts. But I am a little sore. Silly staircase has a design flaw - the bannister ends one step before the last step - so if you aren't paying attention - you think you are at the bottom... I need to look into getting that fixed...
All in all life is good! Work will be a priority today - nothing like accountability and/or a deadline to light a fire under your you know what.
Every time I think I have survived - there is a new stage that is better than the last!
I think I will call this phase the Giddy Phase. This is the phase where The X doesn't matter. This is after you have rebuilt your life again. This is the phase where you can laugh again for no reason at all! This is the phase where you once again want to explore the possibility of an R - not to fill a void - but b/c you want to share the good things in your life and maybe get a little support during the rough spots.
I found out today that pictures from that fundraiser will be published in our local suburbian magazine. I think that now makes me a socialite! I live in the most married suburb of it's size in the country (according to the US census) - so won't get much exposure as single and available...
And my brain is working AGAIN! Since August - I felt so sluggish. And I dreaded answering the question "And what do you recommend?" - b/c I was tired and losing my nerve. Today - I am okay with there being no right answer - just the best one that i can make up.
And I feel all silly and relaxed while I am working.
GAL - GAL - GAL - my new panacea for all that goes wrong inm life! Sometimes you need to take a break when you feel like you can least afford to take one.
I am off to write nonsensical things about things that really don't matter - but someone is willing to pay me to write.
I may plant a tree or two - but small ones - no humongo rootballs this year. I also want to spend some time at Borders planning my vacation.
There was a ton of work on my desk w/o pressing deadlines - it was fun not working for awhile!