This is going to be interesting when he finds out the locks have been changed. I expect him to explode at the thought that you did this. Oh, what nerve you have--NOT!!
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
If he's anything like my xh was, he'll say his lawyer said I had to give him a key and that he's entitled to come and go as he pleased in his home. Funny, my lawyer said differently and I told him that. I even went as far as to advise him that he needed to advise his lawyer to check out the MD laws on such things. Did I hear anything more about it? Nope.
When he starts to spout spittle to you, just be firm and calm. You don't have to justify why the locks where changed. Keep the conversation short and sweet. Gosh, I'd love to be a fly on the wall when he does find out.
Mrs. H, please take care of yourself and try to enjoy your weekend. Do not let bully get to you. You've come too far for him to rip you apart now. I'm glad your lawyer is right there by your side.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
How are you doing? Is everything calm at your house.
You were strong enough to take a major step in protecting your rights and privacy.
I guess I'd like to know that you're okay, and haven't had to deal with an angry man who may just have found out he doesn't have the 'entitlements' he thought he did.
I hope you post to let us know that you are doing alright.
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
I also changed the locks when ex left. I found him coming and going at all different crazy times. One morning I awoke to find him in the kitchen looking through the utensil drawer. He seemed to have no clue what he was doing. I also changed the garage code. He was so pissed. All that anger is gone now. He is very mellow and nice to me most of the time.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
My L took care of things right away. He right away sent a letter over to JA's L and I guess JA's L got a hold of JA pretty fast. The reason why I say this is because JA called me up the next day and said he was going to mail me the money he owed me (really my father) for daycare.
He also would not take my word that I actually paid it to the daycare so he called them up to confirm. The head lady who runs the program told me this. She told him "Of course she paid it."
The preschool/daycare can't stand dealing with JA because he is really difficult. They can't exactly put him in timeout like they do to a child that misbehaves.
My L also requested that JA give me back the garage door opener.
Oh yeah, I had also sent a written request to my L that I would maybe like to have my support checks directly deposited into my account from H's pay checks. Yesterday I got a VM from JA saying that he was thinking of having my maintence/child support come right out of his paycheck and directly deposited into my account and to call him back if I thought it was a good idea.
WTF? Why would he directly throw himself into the fire? I think it's more along the lines of him saying that he would do it instead of someone telling him he HAD to do it.
Ok, enough about him.
Today I went to a baby shower of a friend that I went to high school with. I have not seen her in about 6 years. I got to hang out with a few other girls I went to high school with so it was nice. We had a good time.
School is keeping me VERY busy. I am enjoying it for the most part but I do not like my hybrid course (half online, half in class) I am taking. Never again will I take an online course. They pile on the work!
I have to get the house on the market but quite frankly I don't know when I am going to get a chance to do it. Like I said, I have been so busy. I don't have the time to get it ready. It's making me a little stressed as the judge wanted me to immediately put it on the market.
JA isn't making a move to get it on fast either.
Well, off to bed. Hope you all have a wonderful Sunday. I am sorry I haven't posted much to you all as of late. Hopefully I will find some time soon.
Maybe they ought to give him a bumper sticker for his car that says: I need timeout for bad behavior
Just Kidding!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am glad your lawyers are on top of things.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
MrsH, I took an online course last year and I won't do it again either. I thought it was so much work and then the participation in dicussions so many times a week. I found it very stressful to keep it all organized on top of my job and the class I was taking at the college.
Your L is on top of things! I think that is great. Having support taking directly out of check is the best thing for you...that eliminates one interaction you need to have with him. Let him think it was HIS idea...who cares??
Hopefully you can get your house on the market soon! JA should be helping so don't bust your behind trying to get it done alone!
On a fun note: Went to see Jimmy Buffet last night in downpour, wind driven rain for the entire show!! We were soaked! Great show though!!
Mrs. H, JA didn't think up having the money directly deposited into your account. If he had, he would have done it months ago. I suspect his lawyer advised him to do this after receiving your lawyer's letter. You've got an excellent lawyer and I do believe that JA is going to have to learn that he needs to do what the court has mandated.
I'm glad you were able to attend the shower. It's nice to have a break from all of the madness. Online courses do have a lot of work with them, but at least you can pace yourself and get them done in your own home.
I do hope that today finds you well. Please take care of yourself.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I called JA today because I wanted to find out what day next week would be good to meet with a realtor to get the house on the market.
I told him I would like to bring in 3 all together. I plan on calling up 2 and I told him if he would like we could meet with his.
He told me that he was seeing his realtor tonight because he was once again looking for a place to move, so he can ask her tonight which day worked good next week.
I asked him "How can you afford a place when we didn't sell the house yet?"
JA: I am not buying, I am renting.
(He is already currently renting)
Me: Oh, so they're kicking you out, eh? (I said this in a joking manner)
JA: It's not really important why I have to get out.
Me: I was only joking and besides you brought it up.
JA: Let's just say too many late night parties at 3am.
Me: Ok (whatever)
He sounded really grumpy and down on the phone.
My thinking is, he is looking for a place that has more room so the ow can move in with him. I think he is feeling it in the pocket and NEEDS her to share a place with him so he can afford it.
He's just too chicken sh!t to tell me.
Honestly, I don't really care anymore that they are together. It just bothers me because I don't think living with your girlfriend is going to teach our children any morals.
Anway, he is going to try and get his realtor here next Wednesday. I asked him what other days worked out so I could get 2 more realtors to come.
He said "why don't we just start off with next Wednesday and then we will work from there."
Me: Ok, but we can't wait too much longer as I need to get the house on the market. Are you still planning on coming up and taking care of the outside?
JA: What needs to be done, really?
Me: The gardens need to be tended to. They are full of weeds and I don't have the time to take care of it.
JA: Alright, I will see. My realtor seems to think we will get about $450,000 for the house.
Me: You realtor is mistaken. Maybe last year, but the house have decreased a lot in value in our neighborhood. The house across the street is only asking $380,000 and it is a bigger house than ours.
JA: Well I am not taking a low ball offer for that house just for the sake of selling it.
Me: I didn't say I was either, but the bottom line is that the market is not what it used to be.
JA: Well I think we should ask a lot for our house because I have a feeling in 6 months or so the market is going to go back up.
Where is that rolling the eyes icon? Because that is exactly what I was doing as he was talking.
He really is in for a big surprise.
Dumb ass.
I went out shopping with S4 to get him and S7 some new sneakers. JA called while we were out to ask me a dumb question.
I made the phone conversation quick, like I had no time for him. Actually that is the truth. I don't have time for anymore of his BS.
I am done with him.
I don't even think I love the guy anymore. And that is the God's honest truth.
