Keeping my spirits up

[sofaraway]

Well, I file the sole custody papers tomorrow. I have to be at my lawyers at 11:00 am to sign off on everything. Lots to think about tonight.

If anyone can see any reasons not to move forward with this, please feel free to express them now. I am not having doubts so to speak, merely needing some validation that I am doing the right thing here. I try very hard to make sure I am putting my kids needs first and even though I believe I am, I still get doubts once in a while because I know that I still have some anger in me.

Anyway, any input would be appreciated..... rough daytoday.....


Ian

[frank_D]

I think you are doing the right thing.

She will either be shocked into changing, or she will fight about it just to fight, but not change.

[fig]

of course you aren't doing the wrong thing

snap out of that funk puddin' head

sole custody doesn't mean she can't see them or work her way back to being a mother

sole custody means you are taking care of your kids right now

no upset tummies
i hate when you get all pukey

i will be thinking of you tomorrow
(it's my prep time;) )

[ernest88]

dude..you're being a great dad..I agree with Fig and frank..

snap out of it..

if it's about the kids and you're putting them first then in the end..you are right.

and you can't drink moonshine on an upset tummy.

[sofaraway]

Carrie sent Tawny this text today:

I hope u r doing well. Know that I love you & my door is always open, if you decide to start treating people differently. I hope that day will come.

So she is putting this off on my daughter, she is blaming Tawny for this situation and trying to make her feel guilty. She is nucking futs

I have my answer on how to proceed. She will not make my daughter feel guilty for having ethics and morals. I will simply not allow it.


Ian

[Purple]

Oooh...I hate that sort of passive aggressive "u know i love u but you don't love me - poor me - i've not done anything wrong"

hugs 2 u ian

[BethM]

Hey Ian,

If there was any other choice I'm sure you would have found it by now, afterall this hasen't been a hasty decision. It's sad that with everything else C has done,that she has also put your back against the wall concerning the kids.

You may not be able to save your marriage but you can save your Babies. Someday you'll look back on all of this and know without a doubt that you did what was right.

Love,
Bethie

[ernest88]

Carrie sent Tawny this text today:

I hope u r doing well. Know that I love you & my door is always open, if you decide to start treating people differently. I hope that day will come.

So she is putting this off on my daughter, she is blaming Tawny for this situation and trying to make her feel guilty. She is nucking futs

I have my answer on how to proceed. She will not make my daughter feel guilty for having ethics and morals. I will simply not allow it.


Ian

holy chitt...batchitt crazy she is..

Laying guilt on a child..that stuff drives me crazy..uses guilt as a weapon..

looks like you for sure have your answer.

[fig]

raspberries

she is a punk

and

you know how I deal with punks

twist their arms
while telling them to knock it the f off

and then

face plant them on the wall or floor

its called nonviolent crisis intervention

and

im trained
(just sayin)

and

i do have that stare thing

[sofaraway]

Well, it happened. I signed the papers today at 11:30am. When I dropped off Ross at Carrie's house she sent him up to the apartment and she got in my car. I will try and quote but my memory is not the best:

C- WTF is wrong with you?
Me- Ummm nothing that I know of.
C- You filed a motion to stop me from moving? Why the F did you do that?
Me- I did not sign to prevent you from moving, you can move wherever you like. My petition clearly states that I want primary custodial rights for Ross so you cannot enroll him in school in Mississippi. I also am concerned about the drive to school every morning.
C- What is your problem I just want this over with. I would never enroll him in school down there. Don't you trust me?

Me- Are you kidding me? No I don't trust you, you have given me no reason to and so I will protect myself and our children. If you want this over then tell your lawyer to quit milking you for money and actually schedule the mediation instead of making me ludicrous offers of settlement.
C- What do you want, how do we end this because I am sick of you.
Me- Give me sole custody of Tawny, take half the debt, and primary custodial rights for Ross and we are good to go.
C- No, I will not take half the debt.
Me- ok, so schedule the mediator and they can decide.

It was craziness. I asked her why she took Ross to OM's house Monday night when we agreed not to introduce other people to him until the D was done. She said it was just dinner with a friend. I said a friend who you told our son you were dating. Which by the way you failed to tell him the truth.

She rambled on some more, at this point I was simply sick of listening. She is twisted and just doesn't get that this crap is of her own doing. She still thinks I am hanging on and merely out to get her. It's just pure insanity. I smiled throughout the conversation. Didn't lose my cool at all. She got out of the car angry as hell and slammed my door.

I figure blow up number two will come when she sees her new child support amount with me having Tawny full time. She already threatened to stop making her payment to my mom for a loan she gave us. I will take on that debt myself to save face with my family. I guess she is going to lash out at this point and do whatever she can to hurt me now.

Should be a hell of a ride coming up y'all.....Stay tuned......


I am sorry I haven't been posting much on other threads, I just am having a hard time being empathetic and offering up positive solutions and advice right now. I like to think I know when to keep my distance on here. I will be back to it soon, just need to get over these hurdles presently in my path.

And Bean, a special thank you for what you did, it meant a lot to me.

Ian