Well my own dad was also the best dad in the world!
The other problem with having such a great dad was that he was totally devoted and loyal to my mom, and I was left with the false illusion that my own marriage was going to be the same way.
Oh well!
Survival Goddess "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." -Alice Walker
Hi, well I'll chime in for a while. SG, you sound really good and that peach tree story is the best. Just an allegory of how things grow and change for the better when we do not even know it's happening around us until we are able to see. Awesome progress.
Hi Wonder!
Thanks for noticing the whole point of my story! LOL!
I am glad things are going well for you also. Please give us an update!
SG
Survival Goddess "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." -Alice Walker
I think I got a pretty good deal, but my alimony isn't forever, just until "I marry or his retirement". It just floored me that there were never any kids and she never worked outside the home, but still you think of it as a no-brainer. Guess I was wrong again! Story of my life!
I haven't read all this but SG what do you mean in CA you do not get alimony? You mean because you made equal to your ex?
I live in CA , you know that lol I was granted, oh this is gonna make some curdle, but hey not my decision alimony for life OR till I remarry, live with or ever end up making equal to my ex. Won't happen, as he makes significant. We were married 18 yrs and I didnt make any where comparable to what he did as he had been at his career 20 plus years.
Always told ex,I wouldnt want him to pay that long and it wasnt my intention and would rather not. Even when I worked 40 hrs I still rec'd it as it wasn't comp. to his wage. AT first when ex heard he of course said, if I knew this i wouldnt of left ya ( jackass) I said Yea well I would of left YOU! lol I know, lame response but i was hurt and angry.
So just wondered what you meant.
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
I think in your case, because you were basically a full time SAHM you were able to get that deal. Also, (in addition to the reasons stated in my answer to Beth) at the time of our negotiations I had just landed a big time corporate job, and my salary was equal to Xs. So there you go!
SG
Survival Goddess "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." -Alice Walker
I told ex also didnt like, which I really don't being somewhat dependent on him, he said he realizes the alimony goes to pay the mort. on my way too high priced CA house, so he said he was ok w/ it, and he gets a chunk of change on this house when I sell, EVEN tho he walked away and let it go into foreclosure saying he didnt care, he wanted to be free, free , free as a bird! ( again, thank God for parents help!)
I do not get your friend tho B, I really do not feel WA should be entitled at all, but JMHO, and in the decree I would get alimony only until K retires.
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
K, California like so many other no fault states, doesn't care who did what. I'm sure the judges love it since it saves them from sitting there and listening to the same story they heard the day before and the day before that...etc.
I agree though, when someone makes a choice to end a marriage, then they should be honorable enough to make and easy and graceful exit. But hey, we're talkin' NUTBAGS here ya know?
