custody hearing on friday -- so scared

[NikB]

I forgot to add - sounds like everything is going very well with social services. You'll be fine!! Just a few more rough days until this part is over and taken care of.

((Mary))

[spark]

is it going well? I don't know nik -- he said the fact that I'm still getting my scripts from dr. in nyc is a "red flag". but I have TRIED to find someone up here to no avail.

I feel like I'm fighting for my life here.

[Sara]

Red flag just means that it is something that calls their attention to an item. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with that item. Document the doctors you have called trying to get appointments and what their responses were.

This is something that will blow over. It is not a big deal to drive a distance to see a doctor, unless that doctor is famous for writing prescriptions for pain killers or something unusual like that. People very often are loyal to an established physician and don't change if they don't need to see him often.

[spark]

OK, NOW the next thing is h told them the story about 2 months ago when he was living at a condo with an older prof. from his school, I went to pick up d. I got in the area a little early and called from my cel. h acted wierd right away - like, "you can't come to the door!". the friday before we made an agreement that on his time with her he wouldn't have her around ow as it was too confusing so early in the game here and he agreed.

when I got there, he was obviously hiding something and was blocking a bedroom door. someone was in there. I did get angry. I didn't throw anything or punch anyone but Idemanded that the door be opened.

anyway, when that was getting nowhere, I took d5 and left. I know, not my finest moment, but he obviously broke our agreement and I was angry.

he "claimed" he filed a police report, but I never heard from the police.

so I had to explain the whole freakin' story to social services. why the f am I on trial here???? I'm so sick of this. h is pulling out everything he can. that's what lawyer told me.

[Sara]

And so your crime is.....what? Going to pick up your daughter? Walking into the apartment after he opened the door? Asking him to open a door? Where is the crime?

He needs to get a life. Anyway, if the police didn't investigate it, they didn't see a crime. He is just a troublemaker.

[Virtually_Handsome]

It's simple. Your H is deperate to be in control, and for once, you are not letting him. So, he is trying to manipulate you any way he can. Stand firm Mary! It isn't going to be hard for Social Services, and the judge, to see what he is doing. They've seen it before.

Are you green, Mary?

[spark]

I love that you remember the "green" comment from my lawyer!! thank you for that. h is obviously trying to make me out to be a nut case. lawyer told me to stop talking to social services, they have enough info. so I will stop. we have the hearing on friday, but it doesn't look like social services will be done by then. so more waiting, I guess.

I can't believe h is playing so down and dirty. I hope the judge can see the obvious. if he was so concerned with my "mental state" why did he leave BOTH me and d5 when he left? that's what my lawyer keeps coming back to.

[Virtually_Handsome]

And I am sure he will remind the judge, too.

[spark]

I know I need to calm down, but it's so hard. my lawyer said that is the key, for me to be calm.

I just miss d so much. she's my family, my life. guys, I need all your prayers here.

[NikB]

That's absolutely right Mary - stay calm.

I was afraid he'd throw that incident back in your face, that's the reason I've been emphasizing "stay calm!" ever since then. I wish it hadn't happened in front of your D. Nothing you can do about it now though, and as Sara says, if there were anything to investigate the police would've done so.

It is not a big deal to drive a distance to see a doctor, unless that doctor is famous for writing prescriptions for pain killers or something unusual like that.

Sara - very good point. I work with a number of people who've been relocated from an office about 3 hours away, and MANY of them work from the other office every so often for doc appointments (one even continues to travel to see her hairdresser!). It's not unheard of or even all that unusual.