C2 I feel for your parents not being able to be as involved in your childrens lives because of the D. It must be hard on them, I know my parents are the same w/ Ry, well all the grandkids but my mom watched Ry for me since he was 3 months old till i left work when he was 5, they are very close and it would of be awful for them. Boy D just hurts a lot of people dosnt it?
Good that your parents will be able to spend more time! yeah!! no one can replace grandparents.
and whewwwwww on the win! close one! nighty night sweet C2
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
Your really a stand up guy C2! It takes a lot of grace and control for you to act the way you do around x and mr x. I know others who have successfully put the past behind them for the kids sake, but it took years of healing to get to that point. You were able to do it in such a short period of time. It's really impressive to see that.
It also looks like you were rewarded with a rare Laker's win!
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
We post so much about our's and our children's pain and yet we all know how much the D hurts our family and friends and others such as our church family.
Monday night I was having coffee with a friend and ran into a pareent from my son's school. I mentioned to him I saw his wife at church the day before (they had been starting to go to church, searching for their own relationship with God) and before I could say anything else, he introduced me to his OW and said they had been kkeeping it quiet but that he and his wife were divorcing. He is an acquaintance, not a friend but yet it grieves me and any and all who will find out about it at the school. I am praying for him and plan on calling him but out of his mouth, in his introduction of OW was a comment about being together for 1.5 years so he has moved down that path and it will likely be like talking to any of our WAS's when they were committed to their stupidity. So sad.
Giving God thanks for the healing ATGB,
Thanks you for your kind words. So many of us undertook DBing because we wanted to "do the right thing, right?" Then when we realize the marriage is really over, we desire to heal and hear that we have to forgive but it just seems so incredibly hard. I have shared this journey and am indebted to those who have gone before me and those who have come along side me to help in this healing process.
I truly thank God that the healing that has taken place has come as quickly as it has compared to how long so many have suffered. I am also very aware that because of on going interaction and future challenges and disagreements (heck, we didn't agree with out spouses all the time when we were married, why would we expect to be in agreement after a divorce), bitterness and resentment will always lurk at our doorsteps seeking to take us captive.
Spiritual warfare I do believe in God and the bible so I also therefore believe in the enemy and his forces. I believe our spouses were tempted to pursue their own desires, seeking their own selfish happiness at the expense of ALL who suffer in the aftermath (incidently, we are all seeking our own happiness except when we sacrifice to do for others. I happen to look at my "sacrifices" as doing them because they please God, which pleases me so even my sacrifices are for my own ultimate happiness go figure!)
Back to "warfare"-
So I share all these thoughts and their biblical basis for them because I see this battle for healing and forgiveness as one that is really being fought in the spiritual realm which leads me to the only weapon (according to the bible) that is effective in the spriritual realm, PRAYER.
So I commit to prayer for myself and those who come to mind as well as those affected as a result of the the D.
Stand up guy?
ATGB, again, thank you but the only reason I might be viewed in any positive light is because I realize I can't do the things I need to do on my own and therefore I fall on my knees in confidence that God will hear me and that He will give me the strength and direction to do the things I need to do to live a life that is pleasing to Him.
May God bless each and everyone who ever comes upon this post and may He touch our X's, and all of those affected by our divorces.
And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away." Then He who sat on the throne said, "Behold, I make all things new." And He said to me,"Write, for these words are true and faithful."
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
Everything has all been said. I know that I've said this before but you are our example on how we should all live our life. I haven't been in the position you have YET, but when I am, I hope that I have total recall as to how treat ex and the situation with grace.
Keep those prayers coming C2. There are still lots of us here struggling with being the person we want to become, and the prayers are a constant reminder of the path we need to stay on.
Love, Bethie
Boston 2 / Lakers 1 - I think I'm going to mass before the next one!
Boston 2 / Lakers 1 - I think I'm going to mass before the next one!
The pole spinner giveth and she taketh away (there went my smile)
Dear Bethie you've given me PLENTY in this healing journey, really you have and I love you for it.
lnf you are frequntly specifically on my thoughts each morning on my prayer drives to work.
cat, you too re my prayer drives to work. Yes, our guard must always be up because our foe will never quit and is only going to get nastier as the clock continues to tick.
God never ceases to amaze me In August of 2006, one month after X moved out, I was listening to my favorite pastor on christian radio and he quoted a verse that I abolutely needed to hear at that time. It registered so deeply with me that I got my bible, marked the verse with the date, higlighted it and wrote the pastor's name: Isaiah 26:3
Quote:
You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You.
Fast forward to today. We have been going through the bible chapter by chapter on Wednesday nights in the book of Isaiah and today was the day we covered chapters 25 and 26 including the above verse. As I saw the highlight and then looked at what I wrote, marvelled at what God has done in my life in only 22 months. Yep, amazing!
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
At the time I received that verse, I was just discovering the extent of X's "friendship" with the future Mr. X yet I was attempting to "stand for my marriage." My first post after coming back to the board came a week later (see thread All things... 1).
I had also just lost my job two months earlier after pouring out tremendous effort for that company and of course, I was missing having my kids live under the same roof with me.
So, receiving that verse assured me of a promise that "God would keep C2H in perfect peace because his mind was focused on God and he trusted God."
Nearly two years later, God's promise has been demostrated to be true in that I have been focused on Him, my trust did not diminish and, overall God has moved me in the direction of "perfect peace." In the 2,000 or so posts since returning to the board 8/23/06, there have been plenty of heart aching entries about the fruastration of dealing with X and the aftermath of destruction caused by the D, BUT the gradual movement towards genuine forgiveness has demonstrated a direct correlation between forgiveness and attaining that "perfect peace."
My God's promises are reliable and I love Him so!
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
.........and this is why you have a harem. You got it all goin' on Man!
Excuse me, "imaginary harem" but I'll take what I can get at this point (now, never one to look a gift harem in the mouth, As far as imaginary harem's go, NONE compares to this one, couldn't ask for a better one and so, my imagination is thoroughly content and satisfied for what I have )
Quote:
Thank you for your wisdom, friendship, and above all your prayers. It doesn't get much better than that!
well, one more Laker victory tonight, followed by two out of the following three, wouldn't hurt (love ya, even though you follow THAT team
I can just hear them playing I Love L.A. after tonight's game, Jack Nicklson, Denzel Washington, Leonardo DiCaprio, C2H, Magic Johnson, Jeffry Osborn, all the biggies enjoying singing along with stupid grins on our faces (er ummm, no, not going to the game, just seeing if you are paying attention).
(by the way Jeffry Osborn has always been our good luck charm when he plays the National Anthem. Don't know who played it Tuesday but we are not above using him when we really need a win. He was there in the 80's and the 90's for our last championships.)
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
He is an acquaintance, not a friend but yet it grieves me and any and all who will find out about it at the school. I am praying for him and plan on calling him but out of his mouth, in his introduction of OW was a comment about being together for 1.5 years so he has moved down that path and it will likely be like talking to any of our WAS's when they were committed to their stupidity. So sad.
go figure!)
)
