my story adventures of a WAW!

[christarn]

Thanks B I agree I am going to hang in there as well. I truly believe God is working to restore my M, it will just happen in His time; and I'm sure the same holds true for yours as well.

I to am repairing two relationships. One with God and I feel once I amwhere he feels I need to be both spiritually and mentally, he will bring my H back into the picture. A friend once told me God does things in his specific time not to make us wait or to hurt us, but so things will be better or close to perfect. In mycase I see myself growing as a person more and more and when He feels the time is right He will lead my H back to me, as He will lead your W back to you.

Hugs
Christa

[christarn]

Just an update...no contact with H in two weeks now A couple that we used to hang out with is now going thru a D; I have been told by several people that my H and the H from our friends going thru this have become inseperable. I feel bad for our friends going thru this as they have two small children to put in the middle. I have also heard that the other guy has been staying some with my H, so I feel this is probably keeping his mind preoccupied for now.

I have scheduled a DB coaching session for tomorrow! YEAH!! I had paid for 3 more sessions last fall and was "saving" them hoping I'd be using them by this point for piecing....instead I'm using the first session for "stuck in a rut!!!!" LOL!!! I am hoping my coach can point me in some direction to get out of the rut and get going again!!! keeping my fingers crossed and saying some extra prayers tonight!

Hope all is well with everyone!!
Christa

[Jay Scott]

Christa, I admire your devotion to your situation and pray that God will bless your efforts.

[ping1]

Christa, I hope things begin to go your way. I am sure that right now it doesn't help matters that your H has someone he is close with that is going through this also. Keep your head up and stick with what you are doing. Good luck.

[christarn]

JS and Ping...thank you both for checking in and for your encouragement! It is much appreciated I plan to stick with my plan and continue to fight!!! Thanks again for the encouragement!!! Always needed and very thoughtful of you!!

(((hugs)))
Christa

[Jay Scott]

I think that is the greatest thing about this place, is people in similar situations encouraging each other. Our situations are some difficult life experiences and it helps to have folks who KNOW what you are going through, share with you and encourage you.

[micoms]

Christa,

Has your H been seen in any of your local hangouts lately? Maybe seeing what his friend going through will make him think about your sich. Started reffing again, 6 games Saturday, I felt great. Thanks to cardiac nurses like yourself!!

Mike

[christarn]

Has your H been seen in any of your local hangouts lately?

I wasn't able to go out this past weekend as I had to work However, I will be out in full force this weekend I am hosting ladies night Sat. and we are heading out on the town after we start the night right at my place!!!!!!!!

Maybe seeing what his friend going through will make him think about your sich.

As awful as it is to see another couple go thru a D, I have thought the same thing. I have a feeling this couple's D will be rather nasty. They have children involved and multiple other issues. I think the W in this sitch will have a lot of anger/resentment if the H is out and about with my H partying all the time...could make for a nasty situation...which might make my H open his eyes a little. Or it could work just the opposite. I am praying for the best. I am also praying for the other couple. I would like to talk with them....I think once they get past the anger, they are going to think what did we do??

Started reffing again, 6 games Saturday, I felt great. Thanks to cardiac nurses like yourself!!

Thanks for the AWESOME complement ....I have a very rewarding careeer. I am thankful that during this crazy time in my home life I have been able to throw myself into my career and really excell at what it is I have a passion for doing!

Mike, as always, thank you for your kind words and encouragement. It is nice to have met a friend like you on these boards! Jodi is my coach as well. I am looking forward to our chat. Will post what her ideas/thoughts/advice are!!

Take care
hugs,
Christa

[christarn]

Today I had my first coaching session since August, I feel very encouraged by what we talked about. We went over the 4 stages. She feels he and I somewhere between 1 and 2, she said he is showing signs of "control". So, she also gave me pointers in how to deal with those. As hard as it is, I need to start acting like a friend, not a wife, and put past memories away. Show him a "no strings attatched" friendship is ok...nothing more and nothing less. If there is no friendship there is no way to move onto a romantic type of involvement, so this is very important.

I am happy with how the session went. I learned new things, and somethings I was already doing she validated. She agreed that with our friends going thru a D, that my H and the other H hanging out together, was probably a "misery likes company" type of friendship. I told her about my H being at my local pubs a few weekends in a row, she agreed that he was trying to "accidently" run into me.

All in all good stuff. Now it is more of the same from my side...PATIENCE, and waiting!!

hugs to all
Christa

[thegoodfight]

Your post on the 4 stages and the friendship thing really helped me refocus. Thanks so much for sharing, great information.