peace, Hooray for getting the book. Let me know what you think of it. I have also found "The Power of a Praying Wife" (by Stormie Omartian) very helpful. Having the structured prayers which cover the many aspects in my H's life really helped me pray effectively and I have seen answers to my prayers. The author also wrote "The Power Of a Praying Husband" for men.
I got it from Amazon.com (where I get most of my books because it's cheaper than the bookstores).
Wow, sounds like your H has been waiting to hear from you and wanting to make plans for the work in the basement next week?
It's interesting you say that he was waiting to hear from me. It's interesting to note that my email (which consisted of an email exchange over a couple of weeks with the boys), covered quite a few topics - boys promising to email me before V-day, boys hoping I have a nice "festival", me telling the boys about the driveway "miracle", me attaching a picture taken at a work event, me bringing up that he reminded me twive about the basement and me saying to just let me know what suits him (in terms of his schedule).
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BTW, did you book a vacation yet?
What a coincidence you asked! I JUST booked it last night. I am going to that place - really looking forward to 1 week of it.
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My cousin has the same dog as you and she told me she has to put him down. It's so sad and made me think about you today.
Oh, so sad. Why did he have to be put down? It's sweet of you to think of me and of my dog who passed away. You know, my baby's 1st anniversary of being gone is exactly 2 weeks away. I think I am going to email about it on that day to remind my H.
BTW, V-Day is also a very significant day to me for another reason. This year, V-Day will be my 7th anniversary of my cancer survival. I am thinking of celebrating it somehow - maybe go out to lunch with a friend. If not, I'll go out by myself.
Yesterday, it was nice going out to lunch with some co-workers to celebrate a festival. Today, met up with a group of former co-workers. We had some good laughs. Tonight, I went to the dance studio for ballroom night. I had to force myself to go because it seemed such an effort to drive there and walk around in the snow. BUT, I had an awesome time there. It was Tango lesson tonight - nice dance. Also danced Rumba, Cha Cha, Waltz, Fox Trot, East Coast Swing, Lindy Hop.
Hope all is well with you too. Hope you got in to your singing class. Hugs, PH
Yesterday evening, my H was later than usual. I sent him a VM to ask if he was still planning on coming over. H: Just gotoff the train in <my town>. Do you want to still do tonight? It's up to you. Me: Sure. H: I'll be there in half an hour. Me: Oh, you don't have to stop to get a bite to eat. I cooked something you something you can eat. H: Great.
As we sat down to eat, he thanked me for dinner. He never used to thank me when I cooked a meal, something that hurt me deeply. I was touched by his thanks this time.
Steelers, he loved what I cooked him. It was a spicy marinated beef roast I got from a store. I put it in a slow cooker so it was all ready when I got home. He even asked how I cooked it and insisted I showed him the packaging (because he wanted to get it). I told him he could take the rest of cooked meat with him. He was thrilled.
Anyway, he took his time working on the basement. It was great team effort. When we were done, I asked if he wanted a back massage. He said he wanted a neck massage.
So he got a very long neck and back massage. He was in NO hurry to leave, unusual because he used to say he had to leave to get up early for work.
Anyway, we had a good "together" time after that. He fell asleep at 11:30pm. I let him sleep and did some work until 2am. ------- BTW, while working on the basement, I told him I was going on vacation and he asked why I picked the destination. Me: I heard people say good things about it. H: I tell everyone that our cruise was the best time I ever had. Me: I know. . . Me: My sister has been pestering that I should go on a vacation. H: She's looking out for you. Me: Yes, she wants me to relax. . . During his back massage, we talked about watching movies and DVDs. Me: Last weekend, I saw a wonderful movie "P.S. I Love You". I cried the whole time. H: I remember how you'd cry watching "Below Zero". I was thinking you might like the movie "Puppies" but not sure. Me: Is it on now? H: It's coming, I think. Me: I might like it. Me: I need to order some more DVDs. H: I used to love watching those DVDs with you. Me: Did you really? H: Yes. Me: Would you like to watch them with me sometime? H: That would be nice. ...
Sounds like a great exchange of words between the two of you as well.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Oh, so sad. Why did he have to be put down? It's sweet of you to think of me and of my dog who passed away. You know, my baby's 1st anniversary of being gone is exactly 2 weeks away. I think I am going to email about it on that day to remind my H.
The dog had cancer. I told my cousin to be grateful for the time she had with him as the average age for a Rottweiler is 8 years and she's had him for 12. Nonetheless, it is not easy to say goodbye and do what is right for the dog as we tend to want to hang onto them.
As for your evening with your H, it sounds like it went very well. Let's see: - he enjoyed the dinner you prepared - he thanked you for preparing dinner - he accepted your offer to give him a massage and enjoyed that - enjoyed your company and conversation
You did well.
I bet he will be thinking about you while you are on vacation. He will remember how well you got along that evening and I'm sure he'll contact you as soon as you get back.
You are truly amazing and demonstrating that your life is not at a standstill because he is gone. Good on you!
Hugs, ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
Sounds like a great exchange of words between the two of you as well.
Yes, it seems easier for us to talk these days - ever since that day I told him how hard it was for me emotionally to be intimate and then see him leave. The R talk then seems to have made it easier for us to talk.
The dog had cancer. I told my cousin to be grateful for the time she had with him as the average age for a Rottweiler is 8 years and she's had him for 12. Nonetheless, it is not easy to say goodbye and do what is right for the dog as we tend to want to hang onto them.
Yep, 12 years is a long life for a Rottweiler. I hope mine lives that long. Agree that no matter how long they live, it is still hard to let them go.
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As for your evening with your H, it sounds like it went very well.
Yes, my post may not have been clear. He actually slept over as well.
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You are truly amazing and demonstrating that your life is not at a standstill because he is gone. Good on you!
Thanks for the kind words and "pat on the back".
BTW, I forgot to post that he brought the Audrey Hepburn book (gift) he mentioned 4 weeks ago. He'd bought it for me. I was impressed that he remembered to bring it with him. He also brought me an article about a Rottweiler trained to track down whale faeces in the ocean - amazing.
I am actually contemplating sending him a VM explaining that I didn't invite him to go with me on vacation because I didn't think he'd be interested. Also contemplating apologizing for asking him to leave (before the S). It's a balancing act for me... I think I need to let him know I am not being vindictive... (since he didn't accept my Rocky Mountains trip invitation).
Quote: As for your evening with your H, it sounds like it went very well. Yes, my post may not have been clear. He actually slept over as well.
Yes, I picked up on that.
The book is a sign of the love he still has for you but in a safe way without opening himself up too much, JMO.
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I am actually contemplating sending him a VM explaining that I didn't invite him to go with me on vacation because I didn't think he'd be interested. Also contemplating apologizing for asking him to leave (before the S). It's a balancing act for me... I think I need to let him know I am not being vindictive... (since he didn't accept my Rocky Mountains trip invitation).
Please think long and hard about this. Why would you think that he thinks you're being vindictive? You are going away on vacation because you need to take time to relax. You don't have to explain this.
As for apologizing for asking him to leave, I wouldn't do this via vm. I think it can be said when you have another opportunity like this last one where you can express that you are sorry for ever asking him to leave. I think it may be more appropriate. It would seem to me that if you left a vm just to say that, it may scare him away if he isn't ready to get closer.
Things are going well, don't change the course.
Hugs, ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
ISLH, Yep, I will re-think what you said about the apology, and the vacation clarification.
I nearly fell off my chair a few minutes ago. I received an email from my H on Valentine's Day. It was neither romantic nor mentioned V-Day. But he didn't avoid contacting me today. He may have remembered my comment in January (4-5 weeks ago). My comment went "You seem to avoid me on holidays)" and his response then was "You think too much".
His email: Subject: Thank you
Thank you for dinner the other night.
I got an e-mail from S16#2 who said he has not been writing much. He said he is doing fine and bought some fun stuff at the convention. The time he sent his letter was 1AM.
Today is my 2 year anniversary at <current workplace>. I cannot believe it has been 2 years. The 1 terrible year I spent at <old workplace> seems much longer than these 2 years.
I do not know if I mentioned that my old boss at <old workplace> was fired.
so sad. Why did he have to be put down? It's sweet of you to think of me and of my dog who passed away. You know, my baby's 1st anniversary of being gone is exactly 2 weeks away. I think I am going to email about it on that day to remind my H.
