Alive and Kicking!!!!! (CM # I lost count)

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

So... I get a call from my babysitter who tells me that Cros is unable to focus on her homework and after 45 min she decides to ask her if she took her pill this morning. nope.

I call and talk to Cros and she asks right away "Am I going to your house tonight?" I told her no, but tomorrow she would. She said she really misses me.

I asked if she got to go to recess today and she said no. She didn't finish her work. I asked if she was doing a good job on homework and she also said no. I asked if she took her pill..

"no mommy said she was in a big hurry b/c her boss (couldn't understand her) and the airport."

I went into daycare this morning to pay for next week and I was very careful to make sure that caeson didn't see me. The director said she hadn't seen him unless he snuck in. I look in the book and once again she hadn't signed him in or out this entire week. she was pulling in just after I left putting on her makeup.

I have emailed her about the meds and I tried my best to be polite. I didn't mention the daycare thing. I then sent her a text to tell her to check her email and not to forget the meds tomorrow.

I do not care to talk to her right now. I'm over this sh*te. Her being irresponsible is driving me insane.

grrrr.... I think I'll take my aggression out on the dryer this evening.

[attorneytom]

Hey CM !

Just for the record.. you are on Thread # 43.3 x 15... I remember the first one.. we had to walk to school up hill both ways.. etc.. sigh..

Tom

[12102006]

Ty

Good Lord...do you ever get any peace? Just where was Caeson, if
not in daycare - who was watching him?

I never realized, giving a child a pill took so long, that it had
to be skipped.

Ty, I give you kudos for keeping your head straight...what an
absolute, aggravating situation, at times.

YEAH!!!! Maybe you'll fix the dryer...then onto the coffeemaker.
At least you can fix things...Michael picks up the phone and then
calls one of his friends...personally, I call the maker of the
appliance to come and fix it.



HS

...eewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

AT- We didn't have a sense of direction then either did we?

1210- The aggrevation only helps in a sense. And like I told Ian in a post yesterday, it is better now (for me) to see all this, then for it to come out 20 years down the road.

HS- I can only do what I can do and I will continue to assess each and every situation as it comes.

I found the issue with the dryer last night! I took the entire thing apart only to find out that it was the thermal fuse. Sheesh... I could have left the drum in! Oh well... It should be a cheap fix, but it could be a long process putting it back together! Maybe I'll let the kids put each other in the drum tonight and roll down the street!

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

Hola peeps.....

Back to the grind. I took Friday off and fixed my dryer. (After giving up, taking a nap, waking up and doing other things it was completed on Sat.) Worked on the shed on Sun.

I received a phone call on Sat. from Cros. She had her mommy's phone and I asked if she took it just to call me. She said "No, mommy got mad and threw her phone out the window. She gave it to me so she wouldn't do it again." I asked about that and Crosby started to talk about it then said ..."nevermind, nevermind..." I asked if her mommy was telling her to say that and she said yes.

I got the kids back yesterday and of course we had Crosby hanging on mommy and Caeson was starting to cry. Cara and I went of the schedule rearrangement for when I take the kids to Boston and were in agreement.

After she left I asked Cros about the phone incident and she said she didn't want to tell me b/c mommy told her not to. I told her that it isn't good to keep secrets from her mom and dad and that it isn't fair to her to have to keep a secret. She told me that her mom got mad at the OM and threw her phone out the window and asked Cros to hold it so she wouldn't do it again.

I called Cara after that and told her that it wasn't fair to Cros to make her keep secrets and she shouldn't keep them from us. Especially if they concern another adult. Cara of course took offense and said that it was none of my business. We argued back and forth for a bit. I just kept explaining about how this was for Crosby's protection and I could care less what she was mad about.

Crosby wanted to call CL again so I let her. Then all hell started to break loose. She pushed Caeson off the chair with her foot and wouldn't apologize. I made her apologize. Then she started to get mad at me for changing the schedule and her not being involved. She wants to go every other day to the other person's house. I explained how that wouldn't be fair to anyone.

She was getting more upset by the minute and she was raising her voice with me. I said "Crosby you are screaming at me." She rolls her eyes and says "yaaaaaaa" ...like "I know dad and I mean to do it."

She went to her room right after that. She was begging to call mommy again and I told her that if she stopped crying and screaming she could. I let her. Afterwards I talked to Cara and she said she wanted to swap weeks and have the kids again this week. I explained that I missed them and wanted them till Thur and then she could have them till Sun, b/c of our trip. She said she misses them too and "I never should have left. I never should have. Now that Val is coming down it really is over. If she makes you happy Ty then I am happy for you." I told her thank you and I hope she gets some help someday. She said she realizes she has glaring character defects, but everyone does. (typical response)

In my mind this needs to stop. She comes crying to me about her mistakes after spending 9 hours out on a boat with our kids and her bf? She is having problems not having a crutch when things aren't right with whomever she is with. Looking to run maybe again? Who knows.

I do get the feeling at times that she might be telling Cros that I'm the one who doesn't want us together as a family and that Cros needs to protect her. I don't want that put on my D. She is 7. Cros said her and her mom were talking about her feeling sad b/c of the D. Cros said her mom was sad too. I need to watch this. Cara is taking Cros to the therapist next week. It will be interesting to see what comes of it.

On a good note... Crosby stayed in HER bed all night!!!

[Jen_Jam]

OMG Ty I'm sorry you're going through this.

I often approach your posts looking for humour - I like your humour - but this just isn't funny.

I have no advice on what to do with the kids cos I don't have any myself ... But I'm so sorry to hear of the poor little thing going through this

just wanted to offer a bit of support.

[Fender]

Crosby wanted to call CL again so I let her. Then all hell started to break loose. She pushed Caeson off the chair with her foot and wouldn't apologize. I made her apologize. Then she started to get mad at me for changing the schedule and her not being involved. She wants to go every other day to the other person's house. I explained how that wouldn't be fair to anyone.

She was getting more upset by the minute and she was raising her voice with me. I said "Crosby you are screaming at me." She rolls her eyes and says "yaaaaaaa" ...like "I know dad and I mean to do it."

You have a lot going on however I wanted to say something about this issue.

You need to set some boundries and do it right now with Cros. You don't make deals with 7 yr olds. You tell her the way it is and that is that. You have to show her you are in charge, not that she can manipulate you by throwing a fit.

One thing GF has told me and I have come to see it, kids need structure and they need us to be in charge. Lack of structure, lack of firmness on our part leads to them wondering who is in charge which leads to more problems.

Cros is challanging you to step up and give her structure, to show her you are in fact in charge. Trust me, making deals with her will lead to many problems down the road.

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

JJ- Good to hear from you and don't worry. The humour (your spelling) is still there! However, I have lost my pants!



Fender- Don't get me wrong. I am the "hammer" so to speak. I feel that this is part of the reason she tests me. To see if I'm still going to be strong. I gave in last night, b/c I was on my last nerve. I probably shouldn't have, but it did stop the crying!

My babysitter says that it is almost to the point where I have to set boundaries for two parents. She also enjoys Cros on the weeks that I have her b/c her behavior is different/better. I work hard at setting boundaries with her and she respects them most of the time. She is becoming more well behaved and more of a joy to be around... we just had that issue last night. Other than that and the sleeping (which I hope she is getting) we are doing well. She is a great big sister and fun to be around.

Thank you both!

[swashy]

Stay strong Ty. You are doing great. You can't control CL. You can tell her what you would like to see out of her but only she can control the type of mother she is. So if she is going to throw you under the bus..she will. In the end Cros will know how great of a father you are.

[Tiara Boy (CM)]

So after two wonderful nights of no child waking up, it happened again last night. *sigh*

I have a feeling that part of it is sleepwalking.

Tonight is my last night with the kids until next tues. Then we head up north for a bit. I am getting them on Sunday for the day which should be fun. They are so much fun (and such a pain at times) but that is all part of raising a spawn!