Moving Forward,......taking baby steps.

[PMA_Baby!]

Good for you bud. Sounds like you are making the best decision for your family. I will be there right along with you pretty soon Good luck. BM07

[~Sol]

OK, going through some weird times now.

I go and pick up my daughter just about every day after work. I arrive at her place and I wait outside. Wife usually invites me in but now I am just telling her "thanks but no thanks" (I hate her place). She always kisses our daughter "bye". Some days I am able to leave without any response from her - I am not expecting anything.....but some days she reaches out for a "hug" and even a "kiss".

I am not being turned by her, I have made up my mind, and the reasons are stated above (gotta love the boards for re-reading my posts!) I just find it weird that she wants to keep me guessing and acting warm to me when in fact she lives in her own place. Just freakin nuts I think!!! And I know she is still not right in her head........

Anyway, I am happy that I have direction in my life, even with a divorce that's waiting to happen. I am doing better at work, and doing a good job of not thinking about my wife since I made a personal choice to move on.

[~Sol]

My crazy wife is now referring to me as her XH. Not H, or separated, but already calling me her X. How weird is that? Not much, considering she is not right in her head yet....she's bitter, jealous, and is still not happy - yet she acts "normal" around me, but I can sense when she's upset about something - she'll quickly get angry, raise her voice, and start blaming and lashing.....of course she still believes everything's my fault....she's not to blame at all.

This is what I am putting up with. I'm just trying to be the sane parent for my daughter. W is still confused about where my daughter will go to school. I told her that she needs to be in her current school, where her friends are, she gets good grades, and they identified her as being gifted. The city schools here are much better than the next city where they are struggling in the school system. Where my D is at is a much better school. W still complains about not having any gas money to pick her up (lame excuse), she's complaining she's broke (she has money in the bank - I saw), and she refuses to take my daughter when I need time to study - but I can fix this easily.

All in all, she's still nuts. Doesn't look at herself at all, and even her own co-workers are starting to see her irrational behavior regarding her marriage. Her own kids don't like being with her, so that should tell her something - she pointed this out to me one time and said she can't figure out why her own son doesn't want to be with her, but prefers his step-dad: Me.

I'm doing better at detaching, sometimes her craziness is too much for me, and that's when I need to ignore her more. My biggest concern will always be the welfare and care of my daughter, she's way too young and she needs her mom and dad, or at least one sane parent. I'm just trying to do the best, sometimes I wonder if I can do more.

[~Sol]

I am starting divorce proceedings. I am also in a financial mess, and I want my W's name off of the mortgage or I want to sell the house. I cannot afford to buy her out, and I want to divide everything once and for all.

I am seeing my lawyer again next week and paying for the service. My W just cannot keep her word, and she constantly lies about her own finances.

I know that I should try to keep the house and keep my daughter in the same area. I just want to let go of my wife for good. As long as we stayed married and separated, she will keep using my daughter as a pawn against me.

I just need more advice about whether I should sell this house or not. Again, I cannot afford to refinance it and buy her out.


Just wanted to add that I am moving back to SURVIVING. I no longer want to be with my wife.