Thanks Lin. I don't know what to think about myself tonight. I am okay one minute and falling apart the next. I almost scare myself, so maybe it's a good think nobody is around but you guys.
I understand what you mean about using excuses, expecially being tired, for missing services. I let my weakness over surgery and returning to work Monday be my excuse and I shouldn't have. I sure want to go to revival next week. In the past, going during mid-week would do a number on my energy level the next day at work. But, like you said, we usually do what we truly want to do.
I guess if I ever needed anyone to hold my hand for the next hour...it is now. I going back over old posts and re-reading them.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Hey AnyC, where are you? Haven't heard from you in a few days. You sure helped me that first time you talked to me. Would like to hear from you if you have time.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
I guess if I ever needed anyone to hold my hand for the next hour...it is now. I going back over old posts and re-reading them.
Hey Sandi I know what you mean, we all need that at times!
cire
A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside.
"Your son is here," she said to the old man.
She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened.
Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed
Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.
The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the
young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength. Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine move away and rest awhile.
He refused.
Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients.
Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.
Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.
Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.
"Who was that man?" he asked.
The nurse was startled, "He was your father," she answered.
"No, he wasn't," the Marine, replied. "I never saw him before in my life."
"Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?"
"I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just
wasn't here. When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed."
The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay.
*********
WE ARE NOT HUMAN BEINGS GOING THROUGH A TEMPORARY SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE.
WE ARE SPIRITUAL BEINGS GOING THROUGH A TEMPORARY HUMAN EXPERIENCE.
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Thanks sire2. That was a touching story. Sometimes we don't know what to say, but just being there is the main thing. I hope we can help each other. I will read your story in a second and it will help me think of others and keep my mind off myself. I keep reading other people's stories and coming back to check and see if anyone has responded to me. Like I said, if I can get through tonight, I will feel like I have accomplished a lot.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Good plan of reading the boards. You are doing what most here do and I think it really can help at times. Just be careful not to get overwhelmed by all of the stories.
Also, don't worry about anyone feeling over looked. It is hard to catch up with everyone.
Is there anything else you like to do that can occupy your mind and hands?? Hehehe. That sounds bad but that's me. I didn't mean it that way but you do know what I mean???
Hey Trip....I needed a laugh. Don't worry about offended me. Thanks for jumping in tonight. I have been reading and it kind of scares me when I hear of so many wives the bounce back and forth in the MR. I don't want that for me and H. I don't think I can take that. I have to go one way or the other. That is once reason that I couldn't handle a secret EA or allow it to turn into a PA. I knew I would have a nervous break-down. I'm not made for those kinds of R. As one has already told me the first time I ever came on board...I can't love two men at the same time. So, I had to make a decision. It was the toughest thing I ever did....sad, isn't it? Now, the toughest thing is not backsliding and going back and contacting the OM. I have gone since last Thursday without talking to him....yea!!!
Anyway, even though my emotions are still on the rollercoaster I know in time I will make it. It just scares me to read some of the other stuff people have gone through repeatedly and so sad.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Cire, I have read your stitch and I would cry and then (don't take it the wrong way) I would laugh at the way you would say things. Bless your heart! God, I hate that great guys like you get hurt by wives (like me?). Well, I don't have the problems that your W has had. Gee, what a mess she has gone through! I don't know how she would ever stand a chance at a solid R without a lot of C. IMO, she would have to get herself healed before she can have a R with you or she will continue to distroy both of you. And you are just like my H, you will probably never love anyone like you do her.
I don't know if I got through to the updated stitch or not. I saw myself when you were telling about the online and OW. See, that is how I got involved with a OM online. He fed my poor ego. I was having a very hard time turning 60 and he would see me on my cam and tell me how "hot" I was...well....of course my heart melted. How often did I hear that? It is not that my H never tells me that I am not attractive, he does, but this was coming from a stranger! That turned me on and fed my ego...as awful as it sounds. Anyway, I could see your situation and how the online OW was a "rebound" for your hurt...and then I saw my own self....just a little differently. I was lonely, felt unattractive, no sex, no male attention...like I craved anyway. So, it can happen very easily.
If I didn't get the update on your R, I hope you can tell me how it is going. I wish you could move on in life and get over your W....for your own sake. I just admire your patience. I don't know that I could do it if it was turned the other way around.
Take care of yourself and I hope you will talk to me again. Thanks for helping me make it through a bad night. I will be okay for the rest of the night.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
sandi you impress me.......I wish that my WAW was getting all of the advice that you are getting. It does help me to see your thinking in all of this too, some of it is hard to read. But I think that you are making the right choices.
