Stillme's Chapters Continue

[stillme]

You are the queen of everything!

SD, how did you know?! When I'm messing w/the kids (a/o trying to make a Mommy-point) I make them call me "Mother, Queen of the Universe". LOL. D does it; S not so much, but it always gets a laugh out of them.

I have no idea how you find the time.

I type fast; and I don't sleep. Actually, I'm finally back to sleeping pretty much thru the night most nights. Feel like a newborn AND it's new parents all at the same time!

Okay, more stuff re: kids & H:

H came by about 8pm to p/u the kids. Now HE looks fashed! (He drove 4.5hrs up from Miami & went straight in to [local] wk.) I'd been debating w/not to talk to him about what the C had said about the kid stuff - Was it pressure? Whould he see it as Control that I've taken them to see her again? Did I want to deal w/another Talk? Would it be more of making him out to be the Bad Guy? How should I word it so it doesn't go bad (as 98% of our convos lately have)? ???

In the end, D brought it up by waving her pink blanket (YAY - it was found yesterday!!), saying how she was sad that it was lost for 2 days, & that it has to come "to your apt & then back to mommy's house" w/her. H just said, "Oh, okay, baby." and when D skipped off to outside, I told H the kids had seen the C the other day - He interrupted: "Again??" I said "Yes" and started to tell him about how I was called in the office after 45 min. & the C encouraged D to tell me wht D had said to C (that D missed me when she was at H's apt, etc.) In the middle of my sentece, H squints his eyes looking over my head and says (not loudly but w/emphasis like a bad taste in his mouth) "Did you PAINT D's room?!" I stop probably mid-word, tilt my head to the side, pause and say simply/calmly "No." After a pause, H says, "I'm sorry. Go on." and I continue. I tried not to be confrontational or blaming, but H still said (and this is all calm-voiced and pretty quietly) "Do the kids say they miss ME when they are w/you?" "No, not unless you're traveling for a while -", H (interrupting) "Do you know how that makes me feel?! Me: "- but then you're good about calling them when you're away." H: "Do you ask them if they want to call me? Me: Yes, you know there've been lots of times I call & say 'The kids were just missing you', or 'the kids wanted to say good morning' or 'S or D just said or did something...". He said that he made it a point to call when he was away, and felt guilty when he wasn't able to do it EVERY nigth he was away. (I was thinking: We're not even talking about the same thing, and he's turned it around to all about HIM again.) I told him I was talking about the kids missing me on the days they were w/him & that I'd been not calling b/c I didn't want to get in the way of HIS time w/them but I realize that it wasn't a good thing for them at all. That that I learned that D cried at night for me or she couldn't sleep, but that I wasn't even called & I didn't even know about it until C told me. He said something about how HE was doing the best he could. . .I said "I know, but D wants me to call when she's w/you, so that's what I'm going to do." Also said that the calls would be during the day, & explained why. He nodded, said "Okay".

I also told him about the C helping the kids choose a special thing to take to his apt & back, and that for D it was her pink blanket and S would have his white seal here and a blanket H had bought him at the apt. H said, "Yeah. The Softest Blanket In The World" (like it was a title, or how S described it.) S brought it home once. It's a huge brown chenille-y thing, and VERY soft. So, the convo was not bad; & hopefully good.

Oh, when H asked if the kids had talked about anything else w/C I said how, tho D wouldn't usually talk when I asked her a ques. about how she was feeling or the sitch in gen'l, she'd bring up out-of-the-blue questions like - and I told him she'd asked today about when he & I were going to be living together again & I told him that she said (her friend) A's parents were D'd and now they love each other & live togehter again. He wanted to know what I told her, and I said that I tried to be vague but talked about how we needed to be apart b/c we weren't being nice to each other & we needed to figure out how to be nice again. I said "I don't know what you told them [kids] about why you're not living here, so I didn't know how to answer except that way." He said "I haven't told them anything. They can't understand, so there's no reason to try to explain it to them." I said "Okay." and I think that was the end of that talk.

On the financial side of things: H dropped his check onto the counter & I saw that it was $100 less than normal. (Remember he said, during my ease-the-financial-stress offer something about me taking on $100 of the bills, or him paying $100 less, and "You want to do that? Fine! But know it's a drop in the bucket. . .!!!" He saw me glance at it on the counter. Thinks he's waiting for me to say something about the figure? See if I was serious about my 'offer'/willingness to help/180??

Ok, think there was more I wanted to journal, but can't think of it now. . . Maybe it'll come to me.

[Nomopo]

Please go see Sunny now! I'm on blackberry, and I'm worried about her.

Thanks,
Andy

[ItsKat]

Still-

All I can say right now is that your H is a piece of work.

OK, I can also say that I am always impressed with how well you handle such a piece of work.

[stillme]

OK, I'm now LOLing about this:

In the middle of my sentece, H squints his eyes looking over my head and says (not loudly but w/emphasis like a bad taste in his mouth) "Did you PAINT D's room?!"

OBVIOUSLY, my many & varied GAL & 180's have been noted & now H has no idea what to expect next! He wouldn't have put it past me to paint D's bedroom b/c - even tho he hasn't said Word One about 99% of them, he has NOTICED
-the new curtains & the rod I hung (w/help) over the bare living room sliding glass doors (He said it made the room look smaller; I said it looked cozy, lol)
-the chandelier I hung in the Master Bath (I'd bought it a few yrs ago; he didn't like it & we fussed about that stupid thing until I couldn't stand the sight of it. THEN he hung it.) Now it's up in MY bath.
-the flowers I planted in our bare-since-we-moved-here front garden (HE had to be involved in the planning/execution, but never had the time)
-my new red lipstick, trendy clothes, sexy look & happy w/myself attitiude
-my so-very-busy life; I'm hardly ever home (or usually coming or going when he calls/comes by). Does he wonder what I get up to w/friend (A) [the 34yr old beautiful, together SINGLE chick I introduced to him once]
-the various pictures, framed photos of me/kids, vases of flowers, furniture moved around, beach lounger on the patio (working on the tan I've never had) things done w/o his opinion, input or by-your-leave!

Yeah, he's gotta be thinking: What will she do next?