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A Message from Michele
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Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917921
04/18/21 02:36 PM
04/18/21 02:36 PM
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I wonder where CMM would be if it weren't for you. I don't think he would have made it this far, or would have had such a good quality of life if it weren't for you. I hope one day he truly appreciates it. ANd if not, know you have certainly changed a life.

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917927
04/18/21 03:46 PM
04/18/21 03:46 PM
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kml Online OP
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He definitely appreciates it. And he does everything he can around the house, including cooking me dinner every night, because he knows there will come a day when he canít, so he feels like heís ďbuilding up creditsĒ.

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917943
04/19/21 04:27 AM
04/19/21 04:27 AM
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kml Online OP
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Ok - so, during the last lockdown, I didnít see my hairdresser for a few months. Thatís when I learned I donít have my momís silver hair but snowy white, Emmy Lou Harris/Mike Pence hair. (This also runs in the family - my brother and one aunt). Now that Iím fully vaccinated, Iíve gone back to my hairdresser, but my hair grows so fast, by the third week I have a big skunk stripe, that really contrasts with my brown hair.

Today I ordered some rugs from Amazon, and at the same time, a cheap white wig (apparently itís a cosplay thing). I want to see how it would look if I really let my hair go white. I donít think I will, but I did just watch a documentary on Prime called Gray is the new blonde and it did get me thinking about what a hassle the non-stop coloring is. However, Iím pretty sure the Snow White hair will just make me look old, not special like Emmy Lou. (Maybe if my hair was coarser and thicker, but itís fine and straight. ) Not sure I can make it look as fabulous as hers.

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917948
04/19/21 12:34 PM
04/19/21 12:34 PM
Joined: Jun 2015
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yeah - tough call this. i have been playing the same debating game. my grays/silver/whites are at the temples and around my face. there's this entire movement, which i'm sure you've heard about, prompted by the late, lovely Cindy Joseph of BOOM! fame.

A dear friend of mine who was practically all gray in her early fifties adopted a strategy of changing her hair color from brunette to blonde, then letting her hair evolve to a natural silver/white mane. It's beautiful and was a graceful transition once one became accustomed to her blonde locks.

after letting mine go for months I opted to try a new hairdresser, and a new line of organic haircolor. I've seen her twice and I like the product and her approach very much, so will continue to color for now.

I like that you got the wig to test drive the look. It's obviously a very personal decision, but you will look beautiful regardless. I have no doubt about that!


M 20+ T25+
S 15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
H moved out 4/24/15
D Final 12/23/16

Everyone is doing the best they can, even if it's a lousy job.
Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917950
04/19/21 01:03 PM
04/19/21 01:03 PM
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I have very few actual gray hairs and the few I do have are more silvery/pale gray. I have a big "swoosh" of white hair at my temple on one side of my head which sounds kind of odd, but the rest of my hair is light enough that it isn't terribly noticeable. My dad's oldest sister had the exact same thing in the exact same place, so I have decided not to color mine as an homage to her. My hair is thick and curly and I honestly just don't mess with it much, other than to wash it regularly and get it cut pretty often because it grows so fast. Trying to keep the silver and white covered would be a nightmare and rather costly as fast as mine grows. But, then again, I'm the one who never ever wears any make-up either, so I'm probably not the best judge of beauty standards. LOL Do what makes you feel good, I say.


Me 51, H52
Bomb drop 9/29/2014
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
7 grandkids
Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917958
04/19/21 02:16 PM
04/19/21 02:16 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 17,087
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Dawn - apparently thatís called a Mallen streak - just learned that!

Bttrfly - my sister is a natural blonde, and when she decided to stop coloring her hair blonde and let the gray grow in it was pretty seamless. Not sure that it would be wise to try to make my hair blonde though - itís long and that would take a lot of processing, which would likely damage my hair. My hairdresser did discuss possibly putting highlights by my face to help camouflage some of the gray roots though.

Thereís a couple FB groups of women growing out there gray, and really, for most itís a couple years of awkwardness before itís done (except for the ones who opt for a two inch pixie cut - but Iíve never had short hair!).

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2917963
04/19/21 04:47 PM
04/19/21 04:47 PM
Joined: Jun 2015
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bttrfly Offline
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check out the boom! cosmetics website there are videos where women discuss this exact thing.


M 20+ T25+
S 15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
H moved out 4/24/15
D Final 12/23/16

Everyone is doing the best they can, even if it's a lousy job.
Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2918113
04/23/21 06:28 PM
04/23/21 06:28 PM
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Saw a beautiful picture of a woman on the FB page for going grey that had white roots like mine and fuschia colored hair and they blended together really well. It looked awesome! And looked like it would still look good even when you got down to mostly white hair with pink tips. Not sure what my patients would think of it but most of them have known me for years so I think they could handle it. I might ask my hairdresser how hard that would be to do. I know she is the colorist for famous designer Zandra Rhoades who is known for her flamingo pink hair. It would be a lot less stark than a sharp line between white and brown hair.

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2918115
04/23/21 07:02 PM
04/23/21 07:02 PM
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kml, sounds fun! When I've dated women with greying hair--the 30s MsRebound not the 40s ExGF--most of the time I saw them with between 1/6th and 1/3rd grey hair. It's funny, they chose colors based on how they looked freshly colored, but most of the time their grey roots showed! ExGF said she had grey hairs but I never saw them. She added highlights, which at least with my vision made the few odd grey strands impossible to detect.

I have a grey beard but no grey in my hair. I've considered shaving my beard off to look younger--I grew it 20 years ago to look older--but my hairdresser is adamant I should not, which gives me pause.


May'19 - separation. | Dec'19, Oct'20, Jan'21 - painful breakups. | Jan'21 - freedom!
"We the ones who play hard, we live hard, we love hard, we light up the dark." -- Kesha

Re: Medicare, here I come! [Re: kml] #2918116
04/23/21 07:25 PM
04/23/21 07:25 PM
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Guys are lucky, you get to look "distinguished" with gray hair. Mine is completely, Emmy Lou Harris/Mike Pence white under the brown color, so it has the potential to just make me look like an old lady. But with white going into fushcia I might still look like the punk rocker that I am! I like my current color (which is identical to my original natural color) but it's getting to be so high maintenance now that I have white roots everywhere after only two weeks.

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