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A Message from Michele
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Trials and tribulations of dating #2882846
01/29/20 03:02 AM
01/29/20 03:02 AM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 5,374
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Ginger1 Offline OP
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Ginger1  Offline OP
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Posts: 5,374
Previous Thread:

The odd one out

In case anyone is interested, here is a recap of my date:

Physically, I was attracted. I dont have a type, something usually does it for me. Hes 58 which is a hood match for my 53 . Does not look his age of 51. Maybe looks 43. Thin, but fit as he plays basketball and tennis every week.

He had made a comment I know Im thinner than my pictures.... he told me I was actually thinner than my pictures. Which is true as I do not photograph well, and I have been losing weight. You could tell he was attracted as he told me I look very nice right when he saw me and I saw the wandering eyes. Kept checking me out.

Conversation: so good. He is a great conversationalist which is important to me. Hes got a great sense of humor. We kept it light, talking about some funny like stories, dating stories, tallied about books, musicians, work, travel, kids, but not too much kids. I honestly felt so incredibly comfortable with him. It was easy and flowed. We had a drink and a bit to eat. I had to be home by a certain time due to the mix up with thinking my daughter was spending the night at hers dads. We could have made that date last very long, but I had to go.

He walks me to my car and kisses me. Kisses me a sweet kiss, no tongue. Gives me the best hug. Oh my, its been a while. And we have a few more kisses during an extended goodbye.

When he got home he told me he had a really nice time. I said I did as well and we said goodnight to each other.

I forgot what this felt like. My best friend told me she had a good feeling. My coworkers said they have a good feeling about this one. A was smiling while texting him yesterday and they made me fess up and asked who it was. You guys said you had a good feeling. And so did I.

But it was one date. And it was quite honestly just as I hoped it would go. And I do hope there is another one and we will see where it goes from there

One day at a time, no expectations. But its been a while, so Im just going to enjoy this right now .

Last edited by job; 01/29/20 05:34 PM. Reason: added link to previous thread
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882857
01/29/20 05:57 AM
01/29/20 05:57 AM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 16,374
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kml Offline
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You need to see tonights episode of This Ia Us - theres a scene near the end that will speak to you.

Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882860
01/29/20 07:33 AM
01/29/20 07:33 AM
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 5,619
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LH19 Offline
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G,

All sounds great! A first date that actually meets expectations is even better. I woke up at 2:30 to urinate and had to look at my phone lol.

Keep us posted on when you hear from him again because you will.

Last edited by job; 01/29/20 05:35 PM. Reason: edited a word

M:51 W:46
T:22 M:16
S:15 D:11

Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who really belong in your life - will come to you and stay.- Will Smith
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882865
01/29/20 10:45 AM
01/29/20 10:45 AM
Joined: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,086
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pinn Offline
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Sounds like a good first date! Let it flow G!

Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882874
01/29/20 12:09 PM
01/29/20 12:09 PM
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 5,374
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Ginger1 Offline OP
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Ginger1  Offline OP
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Haha! It was good. I smiled the whole way home. And it really was what I see as the ideal first date. Im guessing the text when he got home was a good sign. Im hoping he asks for a second date. I dont see why not.....

I was thinking about those who said I want to blown away. I think I have a definition of blown away. Someone I can have great conversation with and feel comfortable me with and am attracted to blows me away this time I didnt look at him as this guy I put on a pedestal. I viewed him as someone I connect with and is smart and funny. I felt more in control and just legit enjoyed my time.

So, hes been dating for 16 months. Hes had his fun. He told me he honestly went on a date 2 weeks after separation. I was getting the feeling his marriage had been one of those over for a while. He said the woman he went out with lectured him the whole time. He said because there was absolutely no possibility him and his ex were getting back together, he went for it. It was only a 2 hour first date, but I get the idea it was a low conflict divorce of a marriage that was probably dead for a while and they went on their merry ways. Which after M, I could only
Hope for. I am no conflict with my ex so that would be nice.

It was just so chill, and so fun. He poked some fun at our age difference, but to me its nothing. Hes 11.5 years older. Ive dated older.

Im hoping for a second date for the pure reason I just had such a good time.

Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882878
01/29/20 12:27 PM
01/29/20 12:27 PM
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TBSakaJ9 Offline
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Sounds like a win G......he is also 11 or so years older than you so that is working in your favor as well.

Congrats on a normal, successful, first date!!


Married 14, Together 17
M: 44, W: 43, D: 8, D: 6
M: 46, W: 45. D: 10. D: 8 (CUR)
Bomb Dropped: 5/28/2017
Separation Date: 6/17/2017
Divorce Filed: 2/7/2018
Divorce Final: 4/12/2018
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882891
01/29/20 01:46 PM
01/29/20 01:46 PM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 1,854
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JujuB Offline
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That is awesome Ginger!!! So happy for you. The daughter thing actually worked out great because guys need to know you are not so readily available anyway.and yeah - Im sure hes getting an ego boost dating a girl 11 years younger.
Fingers crossed and cant wait to hear about your 2nd date..


M: 42
H: 43
Twins age 5
WAH in summer
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882915
01/29/20 03:26 PM
01/29/20 03:26 PM
Joined: Apr 2016
Posts: 3,446
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AndrewP Offline
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Don't sit on the divan pining and eating bon-bons. "Thinking about our awesome time and can't wait to see you again" is a non-stalker way of saying you'd like a second date.

As my daughter often says "don't ask - don't get".


On BD
H52, W50
T27, M26
S21, D23
BD-9-Mar-16
D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18
I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good.
But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: Ginger1] #2882917
01/29/20 03:32 PM
01/29/20 03:32 PM
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 5,619
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LH19 Offline
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I would just like to add that as a 51 year who looks 43 there isnt anything that I cant do at this age as that I did in my 30s.

I can still go beer for beer with my 20 year old nephews occasionally.

Age is just a number.


M:51 W:46
T:22 M:16
S:15 D:11

Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who really belong in your life - will come to you and stay.- Will Smith
Re: Trials and tribulations of dating [Re: AndrewP] #2882919
01/29/20 03:45 PM
01/29/20 03:45 PM
Joined: Feb 2016
Posts: 1,854
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JujuB Offline
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Originally Posted by AndrewP
Don't sit on the divan pining and eating bon-bons. "Thinking about our awesome time and can't wait to see you again" is a non-stalker way of saying you'd like a second date.

As my daughter often says "don't ask - don't get".



That only works with some guys. I think that if she responded with a nice I had a great time too after his text following the date - thats enough. I personally, would let him be in the driver seat as I would want a guy that likes me enough to make effort. A lot of guys (not you Andrew) feel like they are getting more value when they have to do the work in courtship. If ginger hands it over and does the work it kind of changes that dynamic I believe she is seeking. It sounds like he is already smitten so give him the opportunity to court instead of taking on that role.


M: 42
H: 43
Twins age 5
WAH in summer
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