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A Message from Michele
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Re: Online Affair [Re: Olivia1] #2785477
04/15/18 10:34 PM
04/15/18 10:34 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
V
Vanilla Offline
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Vanilla  Offline
Member
V
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
Thank you for the compliment, I have no truck with OP at all (says she with heavy sarcasm whilst writing). I might run them over with my big wheels of exposure.


This is about romance scamming, there are two types the online boiler room kind from Nigeria or Russia or where ever....

They approach older men or a yoke vulnerable on line in western cultures and offer the promise of romance saying things like

"You are my sugar bear bo bo"
"I need to be with you big time, you sex lurve snugums"

They work out what to say to suit the victim and it's about money and western telegrams. Cash, luca lots of it.

Then there are the poor whittle scampies in foreign offices and hotels who meet the (mainly guys) peeps and latch onto someone else's good husband thing. These types don't put out initially but do use the same tactics for 'real online scammers' and they want a better life with someone else's snookums honey bunch.

Tactics are the same, it continues until the scammers gets what they want, usually everything the other has got. This is a love bombing scam. There is loads of it out there. Sometimes the little minxy poo with her lush nether sucking venomous tongue will hang on untill they have a home and can inherit stuff. That's called hypergamy, it's a real thing. If you are in Russia there are courses telling you how to do this to get a better life for yourself.

Trouble is snookums honey bunny falls for it, after alll the seducer is cute and has her knickers off (or even worse pretends to have them off). Why do men fall for this glitter ball sparkled turd? This question is asked often on line, why did I fall for it? It is digging into fantasies.

It's not real, but it is for sugar daddy at least in his entitled little noggin. And he won't believe you he is being scammed because not his little cutie bear, she is extra special when she promises to 'take him to the pinnacle of heavenly delights' as she 'caresses and loves his impressive manhood'.

I kid you not these are real words from texts, just google it. And these are tame.... as a crocodile would bite it's prey that impressive manhood is getting bitten. Even catching VD from special snookums delightful love delight won't stop it, after all there is fermented oatmeal.

That's why it's best when big daddy is involved with snookums con girl to get your share of assets and run. Before its all gone to 'pet that cute whittle belly'.

This won't break the spell until reality bites and dear olde snookums hears that schmoopie love alot has moved on to the next target. Darling.....

And it's high risk for the LBS to hang around, especially if snookums big daddy with the impressive manhood is hooked on this hokum.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Re: Online Affair [Re: Vanilla] #2785478
04/15/18 10:43 PM
04/15/18 10:43 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
V
Vanilla Offline
Member
Vanilla  Offline
Member
V
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
If you ever saw an officer and a gentleman with Richard Gene, there was a delightful leach in it who wanted to marry an officer. Excellent portrait and the recruits were warned at outset.

A pilot. He killed himself after discovering she wasn't interested when he didn't get his license. She wanted an officer, excellent acting.

This stuff is seriously scummy.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Re: Online Affair [Re: Amazona] #2785487
04/16/18 01:12 AM
04/16/18 01:12 AM
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 6,893
S
Steve85 Offline
Member
Steve85  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 6,893
Originally Posted By: Amazona

Can I sue facebook? Because of facebook, a lot of families have been destroyed and having an affair is as easy as calling on your cellphone.


This is America. Anyone can sue anyone for an any reason. Whether the courts will hear it is another issue. I'd love to see someone sue Facebook and other social media for this kind of thing. My wife had an online EA in 2005 through Classmates.com.

The problem is no matter what, if someone wants to look outside of the MR for something they feel they are missing, they will do that. Would you sue a bar/club because your cheating H met the OW there? Most here would say you are focusing on the wrong thing. The problem is your H's mindset, not the OW or the method he met her.


M(51), W(52),D(16)
M-20, T-23 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Re: Online Affair [Re: Vanilla] #2785488
04/16/18 01:19 AM
04/16/18 01:19 AM
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 6,893
S
Steve85 Offline
Member
Steve85  Offline
Member
S
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 6,893
Originally Posted By: Vanilla
Thank you for the compliment, I have no truck with OP at all (says she with heavy sarcasm whilst writing). I might run them over with my big wheels of exposure.


This is about romance scamming, there are two types the online boiler room kind from Nigeria or Russia or where ever....

They approach older men or a yoke vulnerable on line in western cultures and offer the promise of romance saying things like

"You are my sugar bear bo bo"
"I need to be with you big time, you sex lurve snugums"

They work out what to say to suit the victim and it's about money and western telegrams. Cash, luca lots of it.

Then there are the poor whittle scampies in foreign offices and hotels who meet the (mainly guys) peeps and latch onto someone else's good husband thing. These types don't put out initially but do use the same tactics for 'real online scammers' and they want a better life with someone else's snookums honey bunch.

Tactics are the same, it continues until the scammers gets what they want, usually everything the other has got. This is a love bombing scam. There is loads of it out there. Sometimes the little minxy poo with her lush nether sucking venomous tongue will hang on untill they have a home and can inherit stuff. That's called hypergamy, it's a real thing. If you are in Russia there are courses telling you how to do this to get a better life for yourself.

Trouble is snookums honey bunny falls for it, after alll the seducer is cute and has her knickers off (or even worse pretends to have them off). Why do men fall for this glitter ball sparkled turd? This question is asked often on line, why did I fall for it? It is digging into fantasies.

It's not real, but it is for sugar daddy at least in his entitled little noggin. And he won't believe you he is being scammed because not his little cutie bear, she is extra special when she promises to 'take him to the pinnacle of heavenly delights' as she 'caresses and loves his impressive manhood'.

I kid you not these are real words from texts, just google it. And these are tame.... as a crocodile would bite it's prey that impressive manhood is getting bitten. Even catching VD from special snookums delightful love delight won't stop it, after all there is fermented oatmeal.

That's why it's best when big daddy is involved with snookums con girl to get your share of assets and run. Before its all gone to 'pet that cute whittle belly'.

This won't break the spell until reality bites and dear olde snookums hears that schmoopie love alot has moved on to the next target. Darling.....

And it's high risk for the LBS to hang around, especially if snookums big daddy with the impressive manhood is hooked on this hokum.

V


Again, what V describes isn't just foreign women doing this across the internet. There are women in bars every night looking for a sucker to become their sugar daddy. Sometimes it isn't just for his money. If you've ever seen the movie Harlem Nights, you saw this play out so that a gang had access to the cash a drop man was handling.

Men fall for it because deep down they want it to be genuine. Just like we go into denial when our WAWs/WWs start sleeping with someone else. "She'd never do that!" etc.


M(51), W(52),D(16)
M-20, T-23 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Re: Online Affair [Re: Steve85] #2785504
04/16/18 02:32 AM
04/16/18 02:32 AM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
V
Vanilla Offline
Member
Vanilla  Offline
Member
V
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
I am unsure Steve giving space to scammers and con men I think social media is partly giving a platform.

Anyone know the jerk on Ashley? She is a nice girl.

Besides both of our lovely LBS are referring to foreign scuzzies not home grow ones.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Re: Online Affair [Re: Olivia1] #2785579
04/16/18 12:15 PM
04/16/18 12:15 PM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
A
Amazona Offline OP
New Member
Amazona  Offline OP
New Member
A
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
Hi Olivia,

Brace yourself.
The pain of EA being a full blown affair is too visceral.
Is this the first infidelity your husband ever had?

Looking back, of all the things I ever went through, if I could do over, these are the things I would do:
1. Have your husband sign a paper saying your demands if he make physical contact with the other woman. Meaning to say, if you end up in Divorce, you will get everything he have. Make him sign and notarized the paper. Make sure you have a divorce lawyer read the draft so this would hold up in court.
2. Make it very clear that if he leaves, there is nobody to come back to. (this would save you from a lot of lies and abuse)
3. Make a new life for yourself. Make new friends, develop a support system, you will need them. Hug yourself and your children often. Pray and tell yourself "this too shall pass"

I hope and pray that you don't go through where I've been.

Re: Online Affair [Re: Amazona] #2785599
04/16/18 07:42 PM
04/16/18 07:42 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
V
Vanilla Offline
Member
Vanilla  Offline
Member
V
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
Originally Posted By: Amazona
Hi Olivia,

Brace yourself.
The pain of EA being a full blown affair is too visceral.
Is this the first infidelity your husband ever had?

Looking back, of all the things I ever went through, if I could do over, these are the things I would do:
1. Have your husband sign a paper saying your demands if he make physical contact with the other woman. Meaning to say, if you end up in Divorce, you will get everything he have. Make him sign and notarized the paper. Make sure you have a divorce lawyer read the draft so this would hold up in court.
2. Make it very clear that if he leaves, there is nobody to come back to. (this would save you from a lot of lies and abuse)
3. Make a new life for yourself. Make new friends, develop a support system, you will need them. Hug yourself and your children often. Pray and tell yourself "this too shall pass"

I hope and pray that you don't go through where I've been.



Amen

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Re: Online Affair [Re: Steve85] #2785739
04/17/18 05:20 PM
04/17/18 05:20 PM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
A
Amazona Offline OP
New Member
Amazona  Offline OP
New Member
A
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
Hi Steve,

I think aside from "reverse psychology" one has to learn to love ones self more. A good friend once told me, pretend it is not you and you are giving advice to yourself. It was easy, but when you are still hurting, it is hard to follow what your rational brain is telling you to do.
It was only when I was finally able to get a hold of myself that I found leverage.
My husband would use to tell me "you would never see me again when the morning comes"
Finally, when I was asking him to leave, words easily came out of my mouth, "I don't need you"
"Do you think I will not survive without you? That I won't live without any men in my life?"
Perhaps with a matching determination on my face, my husband knew I was not bluffing and after that he was "with the program"
He has changed a lot, every time he does something that hurts me, I would let him know. I would tell him "You cannot abuse me anymore, I will not give you a chance to hurt me anymore"
I got the fire back in my eyes.
No, I do not wish to control him. I simply put a stop to the emotional abuse.
I do not know where our marriage will be months from now.
All I know, I am happy because I treat every interaction I have with him as my last.
No regrets, no worries about tomorrow, just enjoying what I have at the moment.

Re: Online Affair [Re: Vanilla] #2785742
04/17/18 05:47 PM
04/17/18 05:47 PM
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
A
Amazona Offline OP
New Member
Amazona  Offline OP
New Member
A
Joined: Apr 2018
Posts: 15
Vanilla,

I have spoken to L's, and because I am in a no fault state, H does not get penalized for having an affair.
For those that are thinking of D, cost can go up to $20,000 and D is still not done.
I am the bread winner, so financially, I will loose a LOT, big time if Judges get their way.
H agreed that if we end up in D, he will not take anything, he does recognize that I alone worked hard on what we have today.
For that I appreciate him and can see a glimmer of what used to be my honorable husband.
But why would I give this OW/prostitute a free pass on a green card?

He is keeping in line, trying not to upset me in any way.
I have told him that our 18th anniversary is coming soon.
Including my birthday.
I told him that if he is only going to hurt me with disregard to those occasions, I would rather that he leave.
He did not leave.
What used to be more than 8 hours of him talking on FB with this OW on a daily basis becomes almost maybe none.
This is why I hated FB so much!
I used to feel like I was the OW, begging for his time & attention.
Now the situation has changed to my advantaged.
It is true, the experience will make you strong.
I know what I went true is painful but every time I reached out to those painful feelings, I cannot grasp them anymore.
I know there is hope, there is a bright future.
How I wish I have a magic ball to see what's beyond.
I missed my old self, but I liked my new me.
More mature, more understanding, and yes, I'm still a fighter and I will always be.

Re: Online Affair [Re: Amazona] #2785743
04/17/18 08:11 PM
04/17/18 08:11 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
V
Vanilla Offline
Member
Vanilla  Offline
Member
V
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
UK
If he really has remorse at this stage, get him to sign a post nup.

Before he changes his mind.

This is likely trauma bonding.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


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