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Originally Posted By: Strngr!
Ive been dipping my feet into the online dating pool. I realize its not the best idea because i often find myself feeling worse after talking/chatting with the girls i meet on there.


So what is your goal in talking to these women?

What is your goal overall?

Do you think talking to these other women is getting you closer to your goal of reconciling with W?

Also, do these other women think that you are an available male? Are you?

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Azz,

The support i was speaking of was with regards to me giving her more emotional attention. Ill need her to help out around the house more and be more independent in order for me to have the time and enrgy to give her that attention.

I hear ya about that next point. I just felt like shes reaching out to me for the first time in a long time. I agree though i will be careful to just listen and validate.

Thanks for your feedback Azz hope things are going well with you and your new love interest.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
EA/PA Confirmed - Oct 30, 2015
Confronted W about the A - Nov 1, 2015
W asked for seperation - Nov 22, 2015
W moves out of house - Jan 3rd, 2016
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Originally Posted By: Azzork
So what is your goal in talking to these women?
What is your goal overall?

Do you think talking to these other women is getting you closer to your goal of reconciling with W?

Also, do these other women think that you are an available male? Are you?

Im not sure what my goal talking to other women. Maybe my brain is moving further and further away from wanting to or beleiving that i can work things out with the WW. I guess maybe im trying to see how the playing feild looks. Im not 100% sure.

I think my goal is still reconsiliation but im having my doubts these days and losing hope.

Talking to the other women has made me realize that there are certain attributes my WW has that i will have a tough time finding in other woman. However at the same time its made me realize there are certain atributes i need my wife to have that would be very easy to find elsewhere.

I have been honest with any of the women i chatted with about my situation. I suppose im not availible but my wife did tell me one time she wouldnt blame me if i was to start seeing another gal.

Im just a bit confused right now need to get some direction in my life.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
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"Im just a bit confused right now need to get some direction in my life."

Talking to other women to get an ego stroke is not the way to get "direction".


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
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Originally Posted By: MrBond
"Im just a bit confused right now need to get some direction in my life."

Talking to other women to get an ego stroke is not the way to get "direction".


Not i know its not the way to get direction and i realize its not where i should be putting my focus. I been thinking alot today and i think i need to get back to basics.

Get A Life
Detach
Have No Expectations
Beleive Nothing
Take Care Of Me (breath eat sleep exercise)

To be clear the intent wasnt to have my ego stroked it was to see whats out there for me if my R goes the way of the doedoe bird. I realize now its not the right approach here.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
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Confronted W about the A - Nov 1, 2015
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Originally Posted By: Strngr!
Originally Posted By: MrBond
"Im just a bit confused right now need to get some direction in my life."

Talking to other women to get an ego stroke is not the way to get "direction".


Not i know its not the way to get direction and i realize its not where i should be putting my focus. I been thinking alot today and i think i need to get back to basics.

Get A Life
Detach
Have No Expectations
Beleive Nothing
Take Care Of Me (breath eat sleep exercise)

To be clear the intent wasnt to have my ego stroked it was to see whats out there for me if my R goes the way of the doedoe bird. I realize now its not the right approach here.


I have been doing the same thinking today. I think I felt everything was hopeless so see what is out there. Not my best choice. I like the back to basics. Took the words out of my mouth.


M 37
W 34

T 12
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S 4

Need break 4/12/15
W no ring 7/7/15

Separate room 4/12/15
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I forgot one thing have patience lots and lots of patience!

Back to basic starts tonight back to ths gym for the first time since christmas. Its amazing i havent gained 10-20 lbs im holdind strong at 188ish target is 183 then get ripped bruce lee style.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
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As far as your W saying she wouldn't blame you if you looked for another W, don't believe it. That was her way of making her feel better about her choices. And if you would follow through it would give her justification. Don't fall for that bait.


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Thanks mvgfwd makes total sence.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
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Confronted W about the A - Nov 1, 2015
W asked for seperation - Nov 22, 2015
W moves out of house - Jan 3rd, 2016
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Just an update:
I am doing well staying posative. Work is a freaking sh!tshow right now its so busy so that definitly helps keep my mind off things. I have done 4 swimming classes with s1.5 its nice to do something like this wth him beats staying in and chilling in the house. If recomend it to anyone whos looking for something to do with their little one. Its a swim class where parent and child go in pool together because the little one is too small to swim on their own. Its good bonding time for parent child IMO. Wife also came over to talk about her pregnency and "taking care of it". I just basically said that must have been a very difficult time and asked if she thought it might be a good idea to see s IC she said yes. We did talk a bit about our R but it was same old re-hashing of old convos and getting nowhere at all. Dont know why i even bothered engauging in convo about us. Maybe I should have just said in not inferested in talking about those things right now. Anyways thats my update for now hope all is well with everyone who follows my thread. Ill post again soon.


M30 - W29 - S1.5
EA/PA Confirmed - Oct 30, 2015
Confronted W about the A - Nov 1, 2015
W asked for seperation - Nov 22, 2015
W moves out of house - Jan 3rd, 2016
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