Get the kiddies back Wednesday and getting house ready for their return. I took Thursday and Friday off so we will have a nice long weekend of fun!
I have lined up a play date for D6, birthday party, and play date for S9. How about that. I also have our bikes ready and we will check out a new bike path, feed the ducks and make a day of a local Lake.
Applied for a new job at work, my boss retired so I put in for it. I jazzed up my resume and cover letter. Fingers crossed everyone.
Lets see what happens.
I have now decided to work with my door open, I want to see people and talk with people. My tears have pretty much dried so I don't cry at inopportune times like before. Now, if I well up, I can just excuse myself. I think that means I am a little stronger.
I will try out the new George Foreman grill tomorrow for dinner of cicken and rice. That sounds like something everyone would enjoy. I picked out some new home furnishings and rugs for the house to make it more "mine". I like it.
Last edited by Cadet; 06/09/1505:46 PM. Reason: link
Since my diaster this morning at coffee - I have been reflecting on where I want to be in a year. I will be single, I will be Mom, I will still be me. A different version of me but maybe a new and improved me - thst is what I am working towards.
I am reactivating my gratitude journal. And today's gratitude was the beautiful California weather. For those of us lucky enough to experience this, just wow.
I am going to Hawaii with my family and two kids for a few weeks in summer. How is that for gratitude? I am so thankful that I have a family. that brings me to a question - how does one refer to former family? After a divorce does one still refer to the family as family or not? I am sure that there are pros and cons each way but just because you are divorced does that mean you are no longer family? Or does D destroy a family and now there are two families where there just used to be one. I will have to think about that one. Maybe it evolves over time but for now I consider us to be two families.
Heavy those are good questions. It can only be answered on a case by case situation. Some keep exs family very close others dont. It depends on the ex. A divorce destroys many things. My ex FIL died last year. I loved him. He was like a father. I heard of his death via a text my daughter sent me the day of his wake. I did not attend. My ex never communicated. So in my case im a former family member.
Hope you are taking good care of yourself
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
Another funny moment from this morning - ex accused me of timing the tax returns to coincide with my attorney representation letter. Wow now I control the IRS too!! Hahaha
I think how you refer to W's family is personal and depends on your relationship between you and them. D doesn't have to remove them ad tour family if you don't want it to. If you want to continue to call them family and they want to do the same, that's between you and them. W has nothing to do with it.
In my case I'm closer to almost all of W's family now than she is, except the sister recently removed from banishment. That won't be changing unless they decide they no longer want me in their lives or me theirs.
Good luck on the job
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
Heavy pay no mind. My ex said "you don't need a lawyer. We will sell the house and we can be best friends". Well when she signed off the house to me the mortgage almist had to call the cops. She became unhinged. She said while screaming "what am I getting from this deal". I said that is divorce
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
Hawaii for 2 weeks???That's awesome. My envy radar just went off:)
In regards to referring to former family members, each case is different. I might be in a bit of a unique sitch in that my x-ILS refer to me as their daughter in law. I am close to them and my x BIL still refers to me as his SIL. I don't know. You will feel arrive at what feels right for you.
Good luck on the quest for the new position!
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
Good luck getting the new job! I don't see anything wrong with remaining close with in-laws, if your ex doesn't like it too bad. As long as it's for the right reasons why not?
Heavy, Good luck on the new job. I really dig your PMA and am a little jealous of your extended weekend/Hawaii vacation.
I agree with everyone in regards to the ex-in laws. As long as you are able to stay detached, it's totally your prerogative.
Me:35 W:30 D:4 S:1 Bomb: 01/08/15, discovered EA & PA In House Separation: 01/14/15 W moves out: 04/05/15 I tell OM's W about A: 04/15/15 W serves D papers: 06/19/15 Mediation: 09/16/15 D final: 12/01/15
