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Joined: Jun 2015
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A few things that can be done to help a depressed spouse.

If you are able to take over preparing meals, you can make some dietary changes that can help your spouse to get out of the depression. A quick internet search returns many great suggestions. Add some dark, leafy greens or some walnuts to the diet.

Sunlight helps to fight depression. When W was relatively normal, she acknowledged this. If your spouse will leave the house, plan more outdoor activities. Take a walk together, take the kids to the park, etc. If they won't leave the house, do your best to keep the living areas as sunny as possible. Open all the shades, try to get some fresh air moving through the house if the weather allows it.

These things certainly won't fix your spouse, but it may just pull them far enough out of the black pit of despair for them to find the strength to seek help.

If you find that your spouse has lost the zeal for life, arm yourself with as much information as possible. Not just in the signs of depression, but in the ways that you can help.


M: 38 W: 37
T: 20 M: 19
Kids: Stepson?20, S19, S16, D12
BD: 02/19/2015 (She moved out)
PA Confirmed: 02/22/2015 (She is now living with OM)
Dazed and confused: 09/13/2015
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 28,300
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job Offline OP
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late30's,
The info you have provided is useful in a normal setting whereby your spouse, family member or friends is going thru depression.

However, when you have a spouse who is going thru a MLC, they do not think that they are depressed, nor do they want us to tell them that they are. In fact, they don't want us to provide guidance on any health issue. If they come to you and discuss their health issues or ask your opinion, then the door opens and you can tell them your opinion.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Joined: Jun 2015
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I agree with you, Job.

I think I should have included a disclaimer to that effect.

My hope is that someone may find themselves in a situation where they are able to implement things like this to aid their situation. Maybe before it reaches the point that so many of the situations here have reached. I know that I lurked on these forums for a long time before I ever posted anything, before I even registered.

By the way, Job. You offer excellent advice. I have never personally said that to you, but I have read a lot of it.


M: 38 W: 37
T: 20 M: 19
Kids: Stepson?20, S19, S16, D12
BD: 02/19/2015 (She moved out)
PA Confirmed: 02/22/2015 (She is now living with OM)
Dazed and confused: 09/13/2015
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