So much has happened the last few days that I am just completely overwhelmed. My life has just blown up around me. I don't mean to sound soo dramatic but I am just wiped out. In another thread I had posted what happened to me and thought the JW was involved. Of course she proclaimed her innocence to H and he believed and even defended her to me. I have since learned she has a very LENGHTHY crimininal record that supposedly H knew about. They win. I am broken. I can't do anything but sob and think. How can my own H do this?? What kind of power does this maniac have over H?? Thanks for all the prayers and good thoughts. I do not know what I am going to do now.
No, they have not won. The game is not over. You are the one controlling the game now (your life) and only you can affect the outcome.
I am not here to tell you everything is going to be alright. No need to blow smoke where it doesn't belong.
Just understand that "they" do not get to determine how you move forward. Take a deep breath and go for a walk or do something to get your mind off sitch for as long as you can.
It may seem impossible, I deal with it in my sitch every day, but you can be strong for you.
Me: 41 W: 36 M:9 yrs Together: 12 yrs Kids S7 S4 BD: 01/13 W filed 5/13 D final 8/13
You are going to pick up the pieces and take care of your self. I still remember feeling so lost and hopeless, sometimes it still creeps in. If you are "right" you are right. He will do what is is going to do and chances are it will not be nice over the forthcoming weeks. It does, however, get better! You learn to love and like yourself again and that is something only you can do. Sooner or later, you will look back on this from a higher - healthier vantage point. Right now you are in the "tryanny of the present."
One of the ole timers offered me some very succint and sagely advice over a year ago - " It [censored] till it does'nt." (something like that - lol)
Hang in there!
Me: 44 Bomb: 11/27/11 Divorced:6/12 Life goes on: 6/13
Limbo, the story of what happened blew me away! I'm affraid for you...i can't believe your husband defended her to you for what happened. Disgusting!! You deserve better, you deserve to be safe. This chick is a loser nut job!! I'm so sorry you are hurting, and I totally understand the overwhelm. I'm on moderation & my posts take days to show. If you see this, feel free to pm me if you need to vent. I'll listen. I know how badly I need to vent &i have no one to talk to. I don't wish that kind of loneliness on anyone. Hugs.
H48 M46 T26 M25 S25 D21 10/4/12 BD - ILYBINILWY, S 10/7/12 H Leaves, works 2 hours away H Done 1/13 H tells S he wants D 2/13 NO R talk since - nothing filed We live together weekends
Limbo, Don't give up.....I know you can do this, pick up the pieces, and make a good life for yourself. One step and decision at a time. Please hang in there. Keep posting and draw off the strength of others and your faith. It must be so hard for you but you can make it. You've showed compassion and have given me strength at my lowest point. It's meant a lot to me.
Oh Limbo, what a terrible thing to happen. I'm so glad your daughter heard your screams. Have the police charged JW? Have you obtained an Order of Protection against her? Your other thread sounds as if your H was horrified. What happned that caused him to turn on you and take the Junkie Whore's side? I hope you punched her in the eye!
I'm sorry, I did not realize you had started a new thread and knew nothing of this assault. I hope you are feeling a little calmer now. You are a very strong woman, and you will rise above this.
Linda
Me 65, Ex 64 M 38 y 2 adult S, 4 G-Kids MLC 11/07 BD 12/09 D 3/14 Dating nice guy 7/14 Engaged to nice guy 12/17
Sorry to hear that limbo. There is nothing much you can about it other than keep working on yourself. As much despair you have now, it can only get better.
I asked this in your other thread and you didn't reply- have you given OW's info to police? She is obviously a major suspect. Report her to the police and let them do their investigation. Whether your H thinks she's innocent or not is immaterial. As long as OW is loose (if she was indeed guilty of this) then you are not safe.
I'm still on moderation, so you might not see this right away, but I just wanted to offer my support and remind you that they haven't won. Not sure if this is helpful, but when I'm feeling particularly overwhelmed and depressed, I try to focus less on the bigger picture and focus on small things. For example, I might feel so overwhelmed by everything that I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to do anything, so my therapist suggested setting concrete goals. So maybe my goal one day will be to go outside and walk to the mailbox (for example). Sometimes life seems a bit more manageable when we handle it in smaller chunks. Not sure if this is helpful at all, but I just thought I'd share anyway!
I just read your other thread and I'm so sorry that you were assaulted The JW sounds like a nutjob and rest assured that her nutty behavior will catch up with her and bite her in the butt. The important thing isto take care of yourself and certainly follow up with the police and etc. to make sure that you are safe.
I cannot tell you how sorry I am that you had to go through that.
Please, please take care of yourself. H and his JW can go rot. And please ensure the police are aware of your suspicions. It is bad enough she came after you but you don't want her coming after your daughter.
The JW sounds like a nutjob and rest assured that her nutty behavior will catch up with her and bite her in the butt. The important thing isto take care of yourself and certainly follow up with the police and etc. to make sure that you are safe.