Just saying hello.

[~ kd ~]

...I happened to have the bottle of St John's Wort pills that i have started to take to try and combat my moodiness.

I don't know if the pills are helping but my mood seems to be getting slightly better. I have been taking them for about 10 days now. I am still terribly sad but it seems a little easier to maintain my composure.

Once you are sure you are taking an appropriate "dosage" of any homoeopathic remedy, then make sure you keep with it. Like many things (DB included) it takes time and even though things seem "better" does not mean one should stop. You may want to keep doing those types of things for at least 3 to 6 months before considering adjustments. Also, be sure to get regular dr checkups and advise dr of anything you are taking if you have prescriptions or any health concerns that might require prescription.

If it's working, keep doing it. And like Kate mentioned, be sure to include at least some amount of cardio (appropriate for you), how ever that might look.

[~ kd ~]

...I happened to have the bottle of St John's Wort pills that i have started to take to try and combat my moodiness.

I don't know if the pills are helping but my mood seems to be getting slightly better. I have been taking them for about 10 days now. I am still terribly sad but it seems a little easier to maintain my composure.

Once you are sure you are taking an appropriate "dosage" of any homoeopathic remedy, then make sure you keep with it. Like many things (DB included) it takes time and even though things seem "better" does not mean one should stop. You may want to keep doing those types of things for at least 3 to 6 months before considering adjustments. Also, be sure to get regular dr checkups and advise dr of anything you are taking if you have prescriptions or any health concerns that might require prescription.

If it's working, keep doing it. And like Kate mentioned, be sure to include at least some amount of cardio (appropriate for you), how ever that might look.

[PatientMan]

My cardiovascular fitness has improved out of sight, and i have stacks more energy. Is that the kind of progress that you mean? Gotta run for gym now....never thought i would hear myself saying that!

Yep. 45 minutes 3x/week sounded like a cardio regimen, which in and of itself isn't bad, I just wanted to encourage you to strength train as well. It sounds like you've figured that out, though. Congrats on your success and keep up the good work.

-PM

[prometheus]

Once you are sure you are taking an appropriate "dosage" of any homoeopathic remedy, then make sure you keep with it. ... You may want to keep doing those types of things for at least 3 to 6 months before considering adjustments....

...If it's working, keep doing it. And like Kate mentioned, be sure to include at least some amount of cardio (appropriate for you), how ever that might look.

Hi KD! That is a nice insight. I DO want to drop the dose to 1 pill per day rather than 2, so i will bear that in mind when i action that. I think that the cardio is going to be key for me.

Finding time/privacy/impetus to do cardio can be an issue for me though. I don't want to be in W's face with this. Skipping works for me. I am not a fan of running, although i do note that i find it more enjoyable and easier these days. I am a little concerned about the impact on my body from running. It would allow me to not be in W's face though. I'll work something out.

Also, i don't want to try too many things at once in case i can't work out what is making a difference. I suppose that would work with DB as well.

[~ kd ~]

If you have any long, hard surfaces, you might try roller blading. Less impact and works additional muscles in the legs which can speed you to optimum heart rate. Alternatively, try cross country running as the softer ground is better for you in a standard shoe, or get a proper air or gel filled sole for hard surface running.

I've actually picked up a pair of barefoot (five toed, minimal sole) running shoes. Takes a bit to get used to, but I love it. Also, if you are going to be going to the gym, running mills will do in a pinch.

lol, yup... not too many changes at a time, like DB, otherwise you won't be able to tell what works and what doesn't.

[prometheus]

...I just wanted to encourage you to strength train as well. It sounds like you've figured that out, though. Congrats on your success and keep up the good work.

-PM

Yes, that is why i am going to the gym. I am hoping that strength training will result in some weight gain. Is that why you would encourage it? I started off training at home, following a plan i found on the internet by a guy called Scooby Werkstatt. I came across him when i was looking for something suitable for an older person. I am 48. Although his stuff was working for me, it was becoming uncomfortable doing it at home with my wife around.

I was losing so much weight - as everyone who hadn't seen me for a while kept remarking - that i began to worry that i was going to end up skin and bones. I never intended the strength training thing when i started, but i am going to give it a go and see how it works out.

All this fitness stuff has never been my bag. I am more your hippy/bohemian type. I am not afraid of broadening my horizons though! Especially if it furthers the cause of getting me to a happier and more puposeful place...or something like that.

[prometheus]

Well....the St Johns Wort that i have been taking DOES seem to be making a difference. I am still very sad....but detaching. My moods seem more stable, and i haven't cried at all...only welled up with tears once or twice. That is a big improvement for me.

I am still procrastinating over discussing finances with my W. Speaking of which - W is being a little friendlier too.

I think that she has noticed that i am doing my best to keep my distance because she told me last night that..."you are allowed to touch me you know. I won't self combust." (i think that she was a little drunk, though i can't be sure)

The reality is, that i want to do more than just touch her. How can i strike a balance with this that won't see me back on the rollercoaster?

[prometheus]

I feel like i am walking on eggshells over this. I don't want to cause any fights or trouble but i have to find out where things stand...it is hard to raise the matter when my W does not want to talk about it.

I am still feeling very gutless in talking to W about finances. She left our housing lease out for me to sign last night. There was no discussion around it except to mention that the property managers do not have my mobile phone number. Also, a month or so ago i mentioned that i thought that it might not be prudent to sign another lease, given our circumstances.

So, I was finishing at the gym this morning and found a text on my phone from W. She asked "is there a reason that you didn't sign the lease or are you just being difficult?"

I replied to her text later saying "Good morning. Yes. No."

How should i approach this in a loving detached way? What have i done wrong? Help would be most welcome.

[prometheus]

I just wanted to add that with all of the stuff that W has "surprised" me with lately, i am not feeling very trusting of her, and i guess that is part of the reason why i am agonising over this.

Any thoughts?

[hotwheelsaust]

I can only empathise with what's going on in your mind prometheus. I am in the same boat. I have two big surprises in the last 3 weeks: the no transfer, and the solicitor letter. I also cannot trust my W at the moment. Who knows what is coming next.

All I can suggest (since you are at least communicating, lucky bugger) is to maybe expand on your answering back to her. Rather than good morning. Yes. No. Maybe a better answer would have been to at least state some of the reason why you didn't sign the lease and added "can we talk later about it". Also rather than saying no, you could have validated the answer. "I didn't mean for it to cause difficulty to you, can I hear later the reasons you feel it was causing difficulties". Something along those lines anyway.

With regards to the weights with cardio. One of the main reasons it is suggested is because the bones and muscles deteriorate more as we age. The weights are believed to reduce the level of deterioration. As a PE teacher I should know this and do this, but after losing nearly 20kgs on the separation diet, I am showing a huge loss of muscle and simply look like skin and bones. On the positive I am starting to show a six pack. Or at least a very good 1 pack.